i gush out every emotion that i've held dear within me, to this complete stranger without any second thought.
he sat still taking in every word, sometimes politely asking questions for further clarification in the middle of my ramblings.
we sat in silence for a few minutes after my spoken diary entry.
"this isn't your fault," he says, clasping his hands he lean forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
i look at his face this time, taking in the kindness that radiated from his round eyes. the bony structure of his face shone defiantly against the gray fluorescent lighting of the hospital. "why do you say that? didn't you hear what i did?" my voice rose an octave as i try to remind him of the terrible incident.
"yes, but..."
staring at him straight in his eyes, through blurry vision, i spoke. "i left him alone, by himself. i promised never to do that. we promised never to do that to each other! and, i did, and nothing can change that." i sigh heavily, feeling worse than i felt before, my eyes filled to the brim with burning tears.
"you ran away because, you were scared right? of your ex?" the guy turns to face me.
"yes,"
"you ran to prevent any type of conflict between you and your ex,"
i nod silently. a lone tear falls hotly down my cheek. i don't move to brush it away.
"and modere. you didn't want him to get into the middle of it either. so you ran away before your ex saw you, and then saw you and modere together,
which would probably make your ex jealous of the "friendship" or whatever."
i raise my eyebrows at his quotations around friendship. who is he to assume more than what was insinuated. "anyways," i roll my eyes.
"but you understand that you protected him from an even worse situation than what did happen. you have always cared for him, so just because this happened once doesn't mean that it erases what he and you already know,"
i realize what he's saying, smiling despite myself, i nod in agreement.
"thanks, who ever you are,"
he laughs, and watching him makes me smile even more, so, i laugh too.
"so," i sit up straight, "why are you here?"
he looks at me for a while before answering. "my brother ran into a pole at almost full speed, he needs several stitches in his face. and maybe a few new teeth,"
