Sometimes people asked me what it was like to loose him and Id tell em , I cant remember. .
But I can. .
It was like breaking,
Body and mind for that split second of eternity, disconnected
3 words
"What the fuck"
Time ticked slowly by for that one, single second,
And then..
Reality,
Suddenly im connected again emotions freely flowing through my body
Im finally able to process it
Lurching forward
Gagging, trying to get it out
Eyes puffy
Tears wont fall
And it happens again,
This time a little stronger,
This wave of emotion brings me to my breaking point,
I scream, and I cry
My heart fucking aches,
Its like suicide
Trying to pull the remnants of myself together as fast as I can so I can just be there for myself but he had taken them all.
My heart was aching, head was throbbing, and suddenly I felt lost, trying to hold on to what no longer existed
Drowning in self pity and inadequacy, but none moreso than disbelief.
Disbelief was the killer,
I was never prepared for the moment.
I needed time to grieve
A catharsis
So I put pen to paper and I wrote
I wrote it all out
Praying that I wont get weak and succumb to the emotions
I held on to my pen for bare life, and I worte, and kept my sanity in check till better days came
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A/n when ya think about ur ex who is bare rubbbish and ya get a piece in less than 5 mins lolol
Thanks for reading lovies
