I Came Here For A Quick Fck But Got Married Instead

Chapter 4

Levi made an effort to go on the app at least once a day, just so Hanji wouldn't feel the need to keep bothering him, and also so he could avoid anymore sad speeches. He'd already gotten another three from Hanji in the two short weeks since she broke into his apartment, and Erwin had even called him to tell him how much he needed a partner.

Levi let out a sigh and put his phone down to make some tea, he was getting real tired of deleting dick pics from wrinkly old men.

That was seriously all he was getting, barely anyone tried to start a conversation by saying 'hello' or 'how are you', not that it really mattered, he was only looking for sex, but still. Even when they were polite, they were usually unattractive, or at least they were to Levi, and when they were attractive, they ended up being boring or they lived too far away for Levi to meet up with them.

Levi resettled himself on the sofa with his tea and hummed, trying to decided whether he should watch TV for a bit, or continue on his quest to find someone to fuck. He placed his cup down on the coffee table and picked up his phone, and just as he did it started ringing.

The caller was Hanji. No surprise there, she'd been calling Levi as often as she could.

Levi briefly considered ignoring her, but knew that wouldn't work in the slightest, so he answered and held the phone to his ear. "What four-eyes? I'm busy."

"I'm sorry, am I not allowed to call my friends now?"

"Not when they're busy."

"You hurt me, Levi."

Levi just knew she was pouting, he could almost see it.

"Alright, I'm hanging up, bye Hanji."

"Wait! Levi!" She screamed, "I just wanted to know if Erwin and I could come over for dinner, and also so you can update us on your progress on Grindr."

"I don't understand why I can't just tell you that over the phone, I haven't made any 'progress' Hanji." Levi sighed for the second time that day.

"Because we need to see you, c'mon! I haven't seen you in two weeks, and Erwin hasn't seen you for at least a month. Erwin said he'd cook too."

"Fine, come over in about an hour, and don't be late, you know I hate waiting."

"Yes! Thank you Levi! See you soooon~!" The woman sang before hanging up.

Levi let out a growl, Hanji knew he loved Erwin's cooking didn't hesitate to use that fact against him.

Ah well, his two closest friends were coming over now, so he might as well tidy up his apartment a little bit. It wasn't really needed, the apartment was always kept in pristine condition, Levi couldn't stand dirt, but he was bored and cleaning would take his mind off of Grindr.

~~~KMD~~~

Exactly an hour later there was a knock on the door and Levi hurried to get it, half expecting Hanji to just burst in if he took too long.

Hanji's huge grin was the first thing he noticed when he pulled the door open, and not long after he noticed Erwin standing behind the woman, struggling to hold what must have been at least six shopping bags. Levi stepped aside and allowed them in, Erwin headed straight toward the kitchen to set the bags down, and Hanji followed, taking a seat at the island.

"So..." Levi muttered, moving to sit opposite his friend.

"So tell us everything!" Hanji said excitedly, "Have you had sex with anyone yet? have you met someone you'd like to have sex with? Have you met anyone you want to have a relationship with?!"