The princes as my mates.

Dreams, Visions or Nightmares?

I wasn’t strong enough and my people were paying for it. Everywhere I looked blood was splattered, leaving everything a sickening crimson color. Bodies lay everywhere both people I knew and one’s I didn’t. Wolves’ that fought with me and other creatures that didn’t. Creatures that came to our aid and paid with their lives. The angels had won, because I had failed. When I wasn’t strong enough I doomed them all to death, the men, women, and children regardless if they fought or not, no matter what species they were. A gooey wet substance dripped down in my face, I reached up and looked at what was obviously blood but from what and who I didn’t know. It was a light purple color that remindied me of a rare flower out in the castle garden. Nervously I looked up and gasped as tears sprung to my eyes and my hatred toward the angles grew. A petite fairy girl about sixteen was pinned to the tree by her translucent wings, the only thing holding her up was the two angelic blades dug into the same tree and her wings. Her face was locked in a horrified pose, her eyes wide and her mouth open. Blood was slowly leaving her body from the many cuts that split her tan skin. Her black hair was sticking to her face and she seemed to be pleading for help, or at least she would be if she were still alive. The poor girls name was unknown but she probably had no family or royals left to tell anyway. The fight was over the hangels had won and all that was left was to wait. My mates were the first to die, their painfilleed faces will be forecer etched into my mind as they begged for me to run, like that would have changed anything. Ally and Hunter were next, their heads ripped from their bodies as they clutched at each other’s hands, determined to die together, they too begged me to run. The king and queen died soon after but how I do not know, thank the demons I wasn’t there to witness that. I had lost the will to fight, everyone was dead anyway, it was too late, we couldn’t win and even if we did we had lost too many to be able to defend the next attack which would undoubtedly come within a few days. And we had nothing to do but wait, wait for the next blood bath and our deaths.

I shot out of bed, sweat dripping down my body in rivers tears streaming down my face. Jake and Josh were frantically trying to calm my, sandwiching me in between them and wiping my face, trying to fight the continuous tears. The cooed and spoke to me in soft tones like I was made of glass while I stared vacantly into space. The fairy girls’ face still etched into my mind. I didn’t know if that was a vision or just a dream sent to scare me, if so I was terrified. If I didn’t learn how to control my powers and fight that would be our fate and it would be no one’s fault but my own. Slowly I let my eyes drift closed and relaxed into the bodies of my mates and floated away into yet another nightmare. One that was almost a reality.

I was floating, I looked around and noticed I was in one of my old rooms, from my fifth family. I saw a body laying on the bed a black note book next to the obviously female person. She was fuzzy and I couldn’t pick apart colors and features. Everything was in black and white but suddenly I remembered. I knew that notebook because I brought it with me everywhere I went including the castle. It’s something I never shared with anyone, one thing that if it ever went missing I would fall apart. The notebook had pieces of me that no one should know. I try to focus on the page and wince as I see the first paragraph, I remember this day. This is the day I almost died; this was one of my suicide attempts that almost worked. If it wasn’t for my adoptive brother who was the only one who didn’t seem to like to see me in pain I probably would have died. I sigh and start to read the page, the words I wrote only a few years ago.

                            The pain becomes more then you can bear and your faith in humanity starts to tear. The voices grow louder and cover the sound of your breaking heart, and you don’t even know where to start, to end the pain and stop asking why, and once again you start to cry. You’ve tried and you’ve tried but you just can’t die, so once again you continue to cry.