I'm Yours [h.s]

Chapter 27 ~Deeply, madly in love~

Chapter 27~ Deeply, madly, in love.

“I think it’s time” I say to Lea calmly while keeping my gaze on my fingers instead of her eyes.

“Time for what?” she asks with her professional tone.

“To tell Molly”

-

It has been about three months. Three long months. Three agonizing months. I spent them mostly talking to Lea, my psychiatrist, or locked in my rented apartment.

I can’t find the strength in my bones to go searching for an apartment and making it a permanent place to live in – all by myself.

After my last encounter with Molly I was stressed. Really stressed. I’ll never forget the look on my best friend after I punched the living hell out of him. The broken nose, the busted lip, the bruised eye. Blood everywhere.

I did that. I would never hurt a fly yet I practically deformed Louis’ face.

I sat around in my mild living room, on the comfortable single couch, watching TV. There was nothing to watch anyway. I should cook something for lunch. I got so frustrated with the TV; I threw the remote control against the counter where the TV was seated. Picture frames placed there all fell on the ground and broke.

Cursing under my breath, I ran over to the broken frames and carefully picked up the glass and threw it in the nearby trash can.

One of the photos caught my eye especially. It was the group photo we took on our last concert, at the party. I looked at our group, scattered around with the rest of the crew. I was standing between Molly and Lou Teasdale. A smile overtook its place on my face immediately. My hand was around Lou’s shoulder and my other one was around Molly’s waist, while Molly’s small hand took its place at my chest.

My heart is aching. It felt like someone was squeezing it really hard, about to destroy it.

I have come in terms with myself a month ago, that I am indeed deeply in love with Molly. It killed me to realize that because I could do nothing about it now. I walked away from her while she stood there waiting for me to turn around with open arms. She accepted me at my worst, yet I walked away from possibly the best thing that has ever happened to me.

I winced as I felt stinging pain in my palm. I was holding the broken picture frame too hard that I didn’t notice the glass has scraped my palm. Blood dripped around on the floor.

That reminded me once again of Molly and the day where she bandaged my hand after my little incident in the hotel room.

I carried on cleaning the floor, and then washed the blood away from my palm, bandaging it.

I don’t believe in stupid myths of fate, but on my way to Lea’s office I couldn’t help but think this was a sign. I’m ready. I’m ready to speak to Molly again. I’m ready to tell her about my locked up feelings. I’m ready to give her all the love she needs.

-

“Are you sure?” Lea asked, taking me away from my trance. I took my eyes away from my injured palm and looked at Lea nodding, “Good, you should do it then” she smiled reassuringly. “So how are you and Louis?” she asked doing her job. We had twenty more minutes left together anyway.

“We’re on good terms I guess?” I rubbed my face with my hands, “I miss being best friends. I don’t want to be just friends Lea, it’s like awkward hellos, and I can’t handle it”

“You did smash his face”

“Jee, really? I forgot!” I rolled my eyes at her. She let out a chuckle at my sarcasm. I am not usually sarcastic, but sometimes Lea can really be a bitch.