Chapter 1
In the darkness like of the night the blackest thing we know to be in this world, surrounded me. No one around me but the warm smell of the breath of my trusty dog. As it comes to the mist of civilization I am alone. My eyes wonder in the darkness of this small confined space as if to find something. In this purest of all darkness I struggle to use my eyes, as I look for a sign, a sign of nothing, of anything. It is so dark that I can't even see my hand, even with it pressed up against my nose it is still hidden from me.
I just so much want to know, to understand. I try to think were I am and how I got here and why. Nothing comes to my mind on that thought. There is no logical explanation for why I would be here or even were the hell I am. I'm like the mind of a child. As if I was wiped of everything, everything I have lived, everything I am. I felt as if I had a clean slate. This is not all it cracks out to be. It's really a horrible feeling. I know that something is there. I just can't bring my mind to remember what it is, no mater how hard I try. No lights go on inside my head. No connections are made inside my mind. No trail of thought, as if I were a raging retard. My mind is dead. It is worth nothing to me. Do I even remember how to stand? I ask myself, scared that I would die here, die all alone.
At first I could not even move my hand. I must be paralyzed for sure. I felt worthless as if everything that I had been taught was all for nothing, as if my life was nothing. The lives of my parents and the lives of all my teachers also worth nothing, less than garbage.
Then as I thought there was no hope at all I felt a nudge, the nudge of my dog Yankee. As was his way of wanting me to get up. I just know that's what he wanted of me. If he could open his mouth and speak to me, it wouldn't have been anymore clear than it was at this moment. Great, now I understand the mind of a dog, as well as a child, and a raging retard. I thought in my mind, as I moved my hand thinking about each move to be made before it was slowly accomplished. I moved my hand slowly over a hard bumpy surface, I recalled it as concrete. Maybe my mind was not all gone. I do remember my dog, I remember concrete, I remember what love feels like, and yet, I still don't know what it is. I am all right.
Maybe I just don't want to remember what happened. What ever happened last night, if anything had happened? Maybe I am smarter than I think? Smart enough to blocks off my own thoughts from myself.
Finally I struggle to get to my feet. I feel that the concrete is wet. With this new perception, a serge of thought comes into my mind, I realize, I must be in the water drainage tunnel. The tunnel is only six blokes from my house. I must have fallen and hit my head on the wet, hard concrete surface of the drainage tunnel.
I am now as the mind of me. I'm not a genius anymore I am nick. I don't have to worry so much about anything bad going on after all but, I will keep the thought in my mind just to be extra safe. Hey, it may not be a bad idea to also call frank, he is my friend on the police force, if anyone would be able to tell me if anything has ever happened in this water drainage tunnel, it would be him. That would surely put my mind to ease.
Though on the other hand, hitting my head would also explain me not remembering, me thinking weird thoughts. Yes that's it; I must have slipped, that's the only explainable resign for me to have been passed out here. In the wet concert tunnel, the place that I come to be along and get away from it all. There is nothing strange about me being here, I come here often.
As I get up, I forget that it is only four feet tall. I stand up all the way, slamming my head into the hard, bumpy, and thinly moss covered concrete water drainage tunnel. It gets darker and yet even darker, all is unclear. It is blacker than the night, it is so dark that it can only be one thing, it must be the spirit of dea . . ..
