Asteria's P.O.V.
Adriaan walled away from me very slowly, he turned once and threw me a most dazzling charm, filled smile as he rounded a corner, leaving my line of sight. I stood still, he was the most charming noble I’ve ever met, and he didn't seem to know who I really am. That meant that everything that transpired between us today was true. The friendship and kindness he'd shown me was actually how he felt. I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming amount of foreign feelings course through me at once. I was still frozen in my place, unsure off what expression my face was projecting when I heard am icy laugh from behind me. "oh my, my, my, so you are still alive and actually showed up to watch the tournament. I must say I'm surprised, I thought you’d run away. Kind of wish you had too." the words slithered from a venom tipped tongue, filling me with loathing and hatted and hurt. It hurt because the voice came from the one person who should feel connected to me, the one person who should care even a little. Shouldn’t the fact that we are connected by birth give him even a small amount of love towards me, his twin?
“I can't believe you're even still hanging around, your such an eyesore. You my dress like a pretty young noble woman, but you cannot hide you're hideousness, it still shines threw. God, your unnatural eyes are the most hideous part of you. Hey! Don't you dare try to speak in front of me! Don’t ruin my ears with the sound of your hideous voice!" Lark was beginning to fume, I made the mistake of opening my mouth to tell him to leave me be, but he cut me off with cruel words. Was I really such a hideous creature that my own twin loathed my existence? But if I was, why had Adriaan treated me like a beautiful woman? Was he also blind? Or was he able to see past my face and see a beautiful woman deep down inside my broken heart? All I knew was that I really wished to see him again, he filled me with feelings of hope, hope that someone my care for me.
Lark stared at me with fuming eyes, such hatred consumed them, I did not know or understand what had caused the emotions in the depths of his light blue eyes. He reached up and ran an aggravated hand threw his thin, dark brown hair. His face was twisted with so much dark emotion that it frightened the heavenly light out of me. He clicked his tongue at me and barked a short malicious laugh, "Your not even worth the effort of arguing, you mindless mute." he threw the words in my face and marched away from me. I tried hard to hold in tears. Why did I feel like crying so? I haven’t felt the need to cry in many years, due to me not taking heart of his words. But today, after my encounter with Adriaan, and the kindness he had filled me with, hearing these words now were crushing the happy spirit inside me that had begun to emerge. His words torn the spirit apart and left it tattered and falling back to the dark pit inside me.
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The night was dark, no festivals where being held for the rest of the tournament, just large feasts where ever citizen, noble, duke and royal person alike could eat in the same presence and toast to the winners of the first round of tournaments. Tonight was dedicated to Prince Rafe. But I hadn't the appetite. My insides where still constricting painfully after my encounter with my brother earlier. I still felt the need to cry but unsuccessfully still could not let the tears fall. I was beginning to become a retched mess. Sleep was not coming to me. I needed to distract myself, if I kept dwelling I’m sure I’ll fall apart. I decided to visit spirit. He always seemed to calm me with his presence. I put on the riding gear and walked out the stables.
Once there I started hearing restlessness in the barn, it was spirit. He knew I was here to see him and his whining made me believe he also knew I was hurting. I ran in the direction of his cubical, threw open the gate and hugged my dear horse close to my chest. He was so much bigger than me, I couldn’t really even link my arms around his neck, but I tried anyway. That’s when I began to cry, spirit bent his neck down for me to hug and rested his ear near my shoulder. I believe I stood like that with him for a very long time, maybe even an hour or two. His proximity healed my hurt and I was able to clear my mind.
Bringing new thoughts to my mind, these thoughts consisted mainly of the mysterious street man and the gentleman Adriaan. I mainly thought of Adriaan. As soon as he had told me he was a participant I straight up wished he were a jouster. As much as I don’t like to admit this to myself but I knew why I wished he was a jouster. It was in the hopes that I might be lucky enough to have a kind and caring husband. Someone who could be a friend, someone who would care for me even though everyone else didn’t. Love wasn’t needed, I knew neither of us would feel love but a strong friendship would definitely be welcomed. But, he did say he knew the Prince of Veritas, meaning that’s the country he’s from. Meaning, his parent’s probably wouldn’t approve of me, due to my family lineage. Why couldn't you have been a Jouster? Why, why, why? Was life against me being happy? Against me being cared for? Why couldn't I be lucky for once? But even if I were lucky enough, it doesn't change the fact that he probably already has a kind, beautiful and wealthy woman his parents want him to marry. I was out of luck, I would just have to wait and see what the Jousters where like.
My eyes had now dried up, but I probably looked a mess. My hair was out loose no doubt full of horse hair and possibly covered in any hay that was on spirits neck. I also had not bathed yet for the day. And I was wearing my oldest set of clothes, they looked so old and weathered but I didn't care. I let go of my gorgeous horse and walked over to a clean pile of hay, laying down on my back in it I let the hay surround me, at this moment it was as comfy as a feather mattress. Spirit walked over towards me and bent his head to start nudging me. I laughed at first thinking he was playing a game. But then his nudging became wild as a warning. This shot me up from my resting place. Terrified of what my horse was warning me about I moved closer to spirit and peered around his protective neck to stare at the stable stall gate.
Instantly my mind filled with terrible fear as I stared at the form filling up the gateway. The middle-aged man stood tall with a medium build that was slightly shaking with rage. His dark thin locks that were the origin of my own, His light brown eyes pierced me to the core. The man was angry. Not just a little angry but aggressively angry.
"So this is where you’ve been hiding? Hmm? Have you forgotten you are supposed to be presenting yourself at this tournament?" My father was beyond fuming with an unquenchable rage.
"seeing you in this sorry stated is beyond what I need you to be doing, but you know what? Seeing as this is how you want to spend your time and how you wish to look, I hope it’s a peasant that wins the jousting or just a regular knight. You don’t need any finery you ugly swine! Did you even bother to watch the sword tournament? Hmm? Or did you spend your time rolling around in the hay with a horse!?" fathers words were getting faster and angrier by the second," you were supposed to at least show up to the royal box to watch you-" but then he abruptly stopped and looked at me. He was no longer shaking with rage. He seemed delighted like he had had an epiphany.
"Actually change of plans, you are no longer invited to join any of the royal feasts or to join the royal box, its your choice if you watch the games or not. If you don't that is your problem not mine. You are not my problem now and soon won't be anymore once you are won and taken away. I will be happy to never see you again." I was stunned, with those knife cutting words my father turned and casually strolled out if view. I was really shocked, father never generally bothered to even talk to me let alone lecture me. Tonight though, he had clearly disowned me. I always knew they wouldn't miss my presence in the castle, but to actually hear this from their lips hurt so much more then just being cold shouldered. I felt my insides tearing up for the second time tonight. Never in my life had I felt the need to cry so much. I generally didn’t let their words affect me. But somehow after the kindness I had received from two virtual strangers in this town hearing these cruel words cut deeper than they ever should.
