Worlds of Thought

chapter 2

daryl trudged along in the light of dawn, a few people scurried by here and there, eager to start their work. he didn't feel quite ready to face maggie, and he was too sore to go out hunting again scared of being too stiff and fail to take any walkers out. so, he decided to walk around the inside of the perimeter, try to explore a little.

hours later as the sun peaked over the walls more people woke and the community became busy. daryl didn't fancy the noise from all the bustle but he didn't mind watching people work, they all looked like honey bees buzzing around.

he soon stumbled upon an area he avoided when he first got here from the sanctuary.
the cemetery.
he stared down at his best friends graves and chewed the inside of his lip. damn he needed a cigarette, anything to keep his emotions at bay. sadly he only had one left, but figured this was as good a time as any to light it up.
after a good while of thinking and straining to hold his tears back he decided to was time to go, and put his cigarette out on his hand, much like he had done when beth had passed. it wasn't a healthy way to cope but daryl didn't know any other way.

"daryl, hey" paul's soft voice called from behind him. daryl wondered how long he had been standing there. "i don't know why but i was a little worried you weren't there when i woke up" paul chuckled, "but it didn't suprise me i guess."
paul had been worried? about him? but why, daryl had only left to get an early start and clear his head. even then why did paul care about him?
paul didn't have to see his face to know that daryl was still struggling to process everything, hell he'd even realized daryl hasn't had the chance to. he hasn't had time to himself besides the days it took to get from the kingdom to the hilltop. although it worried paul, he respected that daryl needed to cope on his own first.
"anyways," paul looked at his feet,"maggie sasha enid and i are having breakfast together in their trailer, it's just a little thing we've started doing every once in a while, you wanna come with me? maggie uh, knows you're here sasha gave in and told her." daryl just stared at him and chewed on his thumb, "she really does miss you, enid too, only enid doesn't know you're here yet... sorry i'm rambling"

"nah you're fine," daryl didn't know why he felt the need to reassure the younger man but he did anyway," yeah i'll come" he grumbled hesitantly. he didn't know if he was ready to face them but he know he needed the push.
paul's face lit up," great let's go!" and he led the way.

the scout led him to a trailer quite close to theirs and knocked on the door. sasha opened it and greeted them with a smile. as they went in daryl hung behind paul, his hair covering his eyes.
"daryl dixon you son of a bitch you could have died or gotten hurt getting here by yourself and no one would have known where to look.." maggie's spiel went on as she pushed paul aside and pulled daryl into an embrace much like the one when the younger man first brought him back to hilltop.
he winced and flinched away from her touch at first but allowed her to hug him. enid hurried over and greeted him with a hug as well.
it was only brief though, because daryl chimed in,"thought there was gonna be some damn breakfast" which got a giggle out of the girls.

they sat around the small living room and chatted and laughed, daryl still sticking to himself only partaking in the conversation when others talked to him.
he was glad maggie didn't seem mad at him or blamed him for what happened to glenn, even though he blamed himself enough, he wouldn't know what he'd do if she had. and if she did, she kept it to herself and didn't let it show.

paul noticed daryl keeping himself distanced and scooted closer to him on the floor where they sat. he smiled ,and daryl looked at him and looked down back to the floor.
soon after, they all cleaned up and headed out, everyone had work to do.
except for daryl and maggie.

paul decided it was best to head out without daryl, he considered waiting outside for him so he wouldn't have to walk around hilltop doing nothing all day, perhaps hanging out with paul. but he deemed that silly and that daryl wouldn't want to hang out with him, and he and maggie deserved some time to actually talk about things.
and they did, and things were okay.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
one afternoon a couple days later paul was climbing down the latter after his watch shift to be met on cue by daryl. he'd start meeting him after his shift was over.
"oh hey how's your day going?" paul chirped as they started to walk
"ts fine, bored as hell." daryl kicked at a rock as they headed towards the trailers. daryl had amen up the role as a handy man in the short time of being there. he'd do odd jobs here and there for some of the residents, and in return got a jar or jam or fresh vegetables. but today there was no chore for him to do.
"well sometimes i go read by a tree behind the barrington house, you wanna come? its quiet and no one goes back there." daryl nodded, he was glad paul was nice enough to drag him around places when he was between shifts. he liked being around paul and found the man oddly comforting, like paul could sense daryls anxiety and discomfort and made him feel normal.
plus paul had helped calm him down after he woke up screaming the other night. he's burst into daryls room to see him with his knees to his chest huddled in the corner. he put his hands on darlys shoulders,trying to get daryl to focus and calm down. he then moved his hands to hold daryls face and forced him look at him in the eye, whispering reassuring words and helped him up and back into bed. it surprised  paul that daryl had let him touch him like that. he left he door open in case anything else happend so he would be able to hear and help.
daryl had felt ashamed but he knew the younger man wouldn't judge him for it.

"i need to stop by the trailer to get my book and a blanket to sit on." daryl waited outside while paul went into the trailer.

they turned the corner wind the Barrington  house and daryl was surprised how much noise was muffled by the big brick building. A group of trees with thick trunks and large low hanging branches, surrounded by soft grass that was littered with dandelions.
daryl sat in the grass next to paul, who leaned his back against a tree. daryl picked at the ground, letting pieces of grass fall through his hands with the nice breeze.
as time passed the breeze grew stronger and made paul's hair get stuck in his face, so he put it up into  a bun. daryl couldn't help but to stare. paul was very nice looking and liked when paul would wear his hair like that. he felt so peaceful here with his friend.
paul must have felt daryl staring because he looked up from his book and caught Daryl's eyes.
quickly, an embarrassed daryl looked away and lie down on his back arms under his head, looking up through the swaying branches.

after a while movement caught his eye as paul stood up and without saying a work, hoisted himself up onto the tree branch above daryl

"you fucking ninja" daryl laughed. paul giggled and peeked his head down to look at him and saw a genuine smile on his face. "you're cute when you smile daryl, you should do it more often." paul spoke without thinking.
Daryl's cheeks were rosy red and he looked away. his smile turned into a smirk and the smirk faded to a solemn face. he quickly got up and started to leave.
"daryl wait," paul hopped down from the tree, collecting his things," is didn't mean to upset you i.." paul stuttered out apologies as he ran after daryl.
they reached the corner of the barrington house and paul decided to just leave it, and let daryl have some space.

and to think, they were having such a lovely afternoon