I forgot to not care

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Hardened heart n darkened soul
Actually caring takes its toll
I forgot for a moment and let you in
That's was a mistake to begin
Fuck I'm stupid, why do I try
I just always end up alone to cry
I need to accept I'll always be alone n not to care
Then keep my heart welded right there
High on a mountain no one can reach
Safe from all the pain that wants to leach
But I forgot and I cared and I cried and I hid
I want to yell, "look at what u did"
But I'd alone hear my cries
So let me just hang here with no goodbyes
Because I am alone and always shall be
And caring has been locked away from me
I forgot and cared again for a moment
I got hurt
That's why I just don't care
Why would I when the results are always the same
Me sitting alone left to drown in my solitude
Dammit I'm done

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