Playing With Power

Sweetest Place on Earth

"Glasses or contacts??" I called out to Val, who was sitting on our sofa.

"Contacts, definitely. Don't want to lose your glasses on the coasters again!" Ugh! That had been a nightmare! And you'd think I'd learn after one time, but nope! Not this girl. Twice!

"Good call!" I laughed and poked my finger in my eyeball, putting in the thin, corrective films. I flutter blinked several times until they settled in place.

I tied the strings of my bikini up, slipped into my pink, thin-strapped dress, made sure everything was waterproof with my makeup (didn't want to end up looking like a troll) and went out to get my bag together. TJ and I had a date at Springtime In the Park. It had to be perfect.

I was such a mom. I had to laugh at myself as I dug through my little faux leather park backpack which had: sunscreen, aloe, Band Aids, Neosporin, sunglasses, extra flip flops, hair ties, lotion, pads and tampons just in case, an Eos pod, my wallet, my badge, a spare battery pack for my phone, and if the sink would have fit, it would have been in there too.

TJ and I had been texting and video calling for a few weeks and we thought it'd be a good time to try an actual date. Until this point, it had been mostly Skyping from bed while watching the same movie together on our laptops-it happened to be mostly Star Wars- or gaming together, or me saying good morning as it was time for him to say goodnight on the other side of the country. Regardless, though, he made time almost every day, even if it was two minutes. I was grateful for the technologies of this century that made it possible to do that kind of stuff. I wouldn't have made it if I had to wait for a friggin' carrier pigeon to and from Cali.

I was super interested in him and where things could go, and I assumed he felt the same. I wasn't ready to jump in bed with him any time soon, but I definitely felt a connection and owed it to myself to at least try. He was sweet and nerdy. And sexy as hell, but I was going to try and not think about that-boy was I doomed if we went swimming.

TJ had a little time off so he was coming back to Pennsylvania for our "date". I could have went to him, but he insisted.

I hadn't told Rolland I was seeing someone yet. For one, it's not like we were anything official, but I also didn't know how to bring it up to him and wasn't ready for that conversation yet. But, TJ was sweet and asked about him every time we talked. It was adorable and kinda made my heart melt. Rolland never had a male figure to look up to and care about him. I hoped that even as a friend, TJ might kind of act as that positive male role model for him some day. I mean, the kid already bounded around the house dabbing and putting knee bars on his plushes. He knew who TJP was, and loved him because of his theme song. Only Yoshi was safe from this kid's wrath.

I checked myself in the small hall mirror again and sighed. "Maybe this is.... maybe I shouldn't Val...." My nerves were setting in.

"What?? Why?!" She turned and looked at me, eyes huge. She knew how much of a fangirl I was.

"I don't know... I just...." I sighed gently as I sat down, dropping my bag on the floor. "It's scary... after what happened last time?"

"Kenz, you really think Teddy is like that asshole was?" She gave me a look and I smiled a little.

"No, but... Vallie, I have a kid... it's not fair of me to put that on him... no man wants that responsibility, especially if the kid isn't theirs..." I chewed on my lip a little. I have to admit a little bit of my self consciousness was kicking in.

"You told him, right?" I nodded as she kept talking. "Then there you go. I don't think he'd be doing this if he was bothered by you having Rolly Polly Ollie... I mean, the guy lives in California and he's spending his time off coming to visit you rather than relaxing. I know you've only been talking for a few weeks, but-!" She wiggled her eyebrows at me and I laughed as I also blushed. I knew she had a point.