I Have No Excuse

Untitled Part 35

The first thing I did when I got in my car was scream. Then when I got home I screamed again. Loud. Pissed and without a care for anyone within range. My parents had done some really messed up and manipulative things, but This. This takes the cake by a landslide, eats it, and spits it out in my face. I had never hated them more than I did now. I had never hated Anyone this much in my life. This must be what all of their 'partners' felt like. The ones they screwed out of their business and or all of their money. Hatred. Defeated. Just plain out stupid. Of course they wouldn't keep their end of the bargain. Of course they would screw me over. Of course they would go and do this to their kid without even a hint of remorse.

"Fuckin- Damn leeches!"

I flipped the cheap tv tray over and then knocked over a chair in my frustrated rant as I made my way to the couch. I promptly fell onto it and screamed into one of the pillows. My screaming was cutting through the music that was playing from Blasters room. I was sure it looked like I was throwing a tantrum- no I was totally throwing a tantrum like a three year old, but I honestly couldn't care less. I just screamed my lungs out with curses and just plain screaming in an attempt to free myself of the frustration and pain I felt. I shouldn't have expected anything less. Not even for me. Their own kid.

"That bad, huh? Want to talk about it?"

"Those fucking sorry excuses that I call my parents-"

"Can't understand you when your face first into a pillow."

I knocked the pillow off the couch instead of getting up, but Blaster didn't make a comment on it. The sound of rock music playing in the background was actually nice given what I had been forced to listen to tonight.

"Those sorry excuses that I call my parents ripped me off! I mean I should have expected it! I mean I'm not their kid or anything, right?! Of course they were going to screw me over! Fuck them! Fuck everything! I have never hated anyone more than I hate them right now!"

"Wait they screwed you over? How bad are we talking here?"

I just shoved the thin folder into his hands before I went back to screaming and cursing. I was going to be hurting by the time I was done. My voice was going to be gone. No doubt about it. Then I kicked the pillow at my feet off the couch just because I could. Blaster again didn't make a comment on it and just opened the folder. There was silence besides the steady thrum of music coming from Blasters room. I couldn't really make out any words through the closed door.

"This is it?" Blaster finally spoke with some slight disbelief in his tone that made me want to scream again.

"Yes. That is It!"

"But I thought- oh shit."

"Yeah! They have more! They just won't give it to me! They want me to jump for it like a starving dog for their amusement! Those lying bastards want me to do more shit for them! Not only that there are rumors going around about me like you wouldn't Believe!"

"If this keeps up the information isn't going to be able to help us by the time we get it."

"I know! But what am I supposed to do?! I just need Something! Like just the name of who he works for and Bam! We'd be able to go from there! But I doubt they'd just give it to me! Hell it'll probably be the last thing they give me!"

"I think you should back out."

"They have something going on too, Blaster! They're doing something and it has to do with the ocean!"

"Jazz, we can find another way and if they are doing something harmful we'll deal with it if it becomes a problem."

"If?! No it's when! They expect me to believe that they're funding a Nonprofit organization to Clean the ocean?! I don't think so!"

There was no way they were doing anything near the ocean that wouldn't get them more money. Money was all they cared about. They didn't hoard it like dragons did in fairytales with gold with how they tossed it around like it didn't matter, but they Never poured any money into anything unless it was going to get them more money in return. And they took shortcuts. They bent rules until they strained, ready to break. If lines were crossed they bribed the authority and in the end got away with it. They were going to cause some real damage and they were going to get away with it.

"It could be for their image. Maybe they did something or got caught doing something and need to get back into the public's or their partner's favor?"

"Oh if that happened it would be Big! People would know and the rumors would Fly! No they are up to something and maybe I can't get to Shane this way, we'll find something else, but I can figure out what they are doing!"

"Jazz, did you even stop to think that they're just baiting you? That maybe it is innocent just to get you suspicious?"

"Yes! But then I decided it didn't matter on the way here and I needed to make sure!"

"You're letting yourself get dragged into this. You Need to let this go. We'll figure something out. We have a whole facility of people to help us if things go bad. We're not the only ones that care. They're not just going to sit back and let whatever happens happen either."

"I know, but if I back out now... I don't want to lose."

"For the love of... I'm going to bed. There's pizza in the fridge. I'll try to talk you out of it again tomorrow when you're less... This."

"K. Night, Blaster."