Falling - A Short Story

10

Gregory James

It looked like him, it sounded like him but there was no chance that the man who stood in front of me was my father. If you had met him four years ago, when I was thirteen and when he left me and my family you would understand my confusion.

If you had seen him that time you would have met a drunken look like man with a big beard and the smell of alcohol. That's how I remembered him.

But now, I can only see a wealthy looking man. Well dressed and decent smell. That's why I just couldn't believe it when he confirmed who he really was.

My father.

"Can I come in?" He asked gawky. It took some long for me to nod. Once I did he came in.

"I-I believe this is a shock for you." He was the first to speak.

"Yeah, you can say that."

He looked around the house. Particularly at the pictures on the walls.

"Look, we need to-" He began but I didn't let him finish.

"What are you doing here?" I asked taking one step closer to him.

"Your mother found me." He said and my eyes widened.

"My mother? You know where she is?" I asked, completely forgetting that it was my father, who I hadn't seen or heard in four years that stood in front of me right now.

"Yes, she came looking for me today." He said and I felt my heart skipping a beat.

"W-where is she?".

He frowned confused with my desperation and glanced at the door then back at me.

"She said she was coming to meet us, why do you sound so... Euphoric?" He asked.

"Because she hasn't appeared since yesterday! For a minute I thought she had fucking left us like you did!" I snapped. He slumped his shoulders.

"Can we talk? Please?" He asked ignoring my previous comment. I looked at him like if he was crazy.

"You want to talk? Talk about what? It's been four damn years now and you never gave a shit about me, Rob, or your fucking wife who you left pregnant with your daughter. Don't act like it was nothing. I want nothing with you. In fact, I do want something, I want you to fucking leave." I yelled furiously opening the door signing for him to leave.

"She was the one who kicked me out! Remember?" He replied offended.

"You were the one who beat the crap out of her every damn day. Remember?". I took another step. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. He let out of a breath instead.

"I know I fucked things up, I was a bad father and a crappy husband but-" I couldn't let him finish again. I've been holding this words for so long. I just need to let them out.

"Bad father? Just a bad father? Are you out of your freaking mind?" I took a deep breath, holding my anger because I knew that what I was about to say could make me break down. "Rob lost his mind. He went insane. He ran away a hundred times and now he's dead. You didn't even bothered to see him. You didn't even bothered to go on your own son's funeral." I let go without letting any tear out for my surprise. As the words came out, his face went red and now he took a step forward.

"Didn't bothered? I sent you guys money every month! I tried to talk to you guys so many times but your mother didn't allow me. She didn't let me even look at you guys. And for your information I did go to Rob funeral! I went there after everyone had left so don't you say I didn't bothered." He snapped back. I had the urge of punching him in the face but it wasn't worth it. Not with this son of a bitch.

"Don't put this on my mother, she had reasons to not let you near us! Fuck, you almost got her killed. You drank and beat her every damn day so don't you blame her for this. I'm actually thanful she did that, otherwise I would have ran away or killed you." I shouted. He gave up and looked down.

"I know what I did was awful, I regret it single everyday, I really do. But don't think I didn't try to fix it. I went to rehab, I got sober up, I found a job. I tried to reach out to you guys so many times. I know your mother had her reasons to not let me but I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I want you to know how sorry I am for not being the father you needed, for not being here when Rob was going crazy. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm not expecting you to forgive me but I just ask for you to think about it. To see from where I'm standing." He told me. I could tell he was being honest. But there is not a single part of me who could trust him again.

"Greg, your sister wants to- Oh, I'm sorry." Brooke apologized after realizing she had interrupted us.

"It's fine. Brooke, this is Samuel, Samuel, this is my friend Brooke." I introduced them feeling disgusted as I said his name. Disgusted about this presence.

Brooke flashed him an awkward smile. "Hey."

"Hey." He said back. Then he looked back at me. "Is she here? My daughter?" He asked. I nodded serious.

"Could I see her?". I hesitated to answer. I looked at Brooke and she was eyeing me confused. I nodded once to her and she went up the stairs again. Bringing Megan down a few minutes later.

When Megan appeared in the room. Samuel - I can't call him dad - widened his eyes and smiled.

"Greggy, who is this man?" Megan asked pulling the hem of my shirt. I looked down at her and picked her from the floor. Brooke was watching everything behind us.

"This is Samuel." I looked at her and then at him. He was still grinning.

"Hello. What's your name, darling?" He asked softly.

"I'm Megan." She replied smiling. His smile grew even larger.

"Megan, do you want to go to the park now?" Brooke asked after clearing her throat. Megan nodded happily.

"Is Samuel coming too?" She asked. He looked at me. I stammered before giving her a proper answer.

"No Megan, Samuel has some things he has to do. Right, Samuel?" I looked at him raising an eyebrow and he looked down upset.

"Yeah, I do. But I'll come back, okay?" He said. I couldn't do anything but nod. I didn't want to see that guy again. I went through four years of my life without him, I know it doesn't sound like a lot but I was thirteen when he left, It was a time when I needed a father the most. I needed a masculine figure to look up to and he wasn't there. He left leaving my family falling apart. But it was Megan that gave me second thoughts about it.

Maybe it is too late for me to even think about having a father again but it sure isn't late for Megan, she's only four after all.

After Samuel said goodbye I walked him to the door. Before he left he paused and looked at me.

"Your seventeen, right?" He asked. Why do you care, asshole?

"Yeah." I replied. He smiled.

"Bye Greg". He waved before entering his car. I watched as he drove away from me, I watched untll I couldn't see his car anymore.

There he goes again. It was a situation I was too familiar to.