Happier

Chapter 7

Saturday is game day and the Roosevelt Roses assemble in the gym one more time to rehearse the routine. Lacey feels a little weird about everything. About almost kissing Cole last night and about tonight being her last Roosevelt Roses performance. 

"OK, ladies," Lacey starts after they've rehearsed the routine twice, "I want all of you to be on your very best tonight. I know we can do this. I believe in us," Lacey's peptalks are normally a lot better than this, but she isn't really feeling up for it. She's had so much fun with Cole last night, she just wants to spend tonight with him too. But maybe she shouldn't. Maybe she should go out with Archie instead. It's been a while since they've gone out on a date. Since Cole came into her life, she's been distancing herself from Archie. She only ever sees him in school now. Her mind hasn't been made up either. Should she break up with him or not? If she quits the Roosevelt Roses, he may be the only thing that can keep her reputation on point. Or maybe it'll be a social suicide. Maybe he'll break up with her if she quits cheerleading. Her breath hitches in her throat as her mind keeps on racing. Her breathing becomes short and quick, as if someone's stepping on her throat.
"Lace, you okay?" she hears Violet ask, but it sounds blurry and rather far away.
"Girls, take five!" Melanie shouts to the others and they all scatter around the gym. Some towards their bags, others just to the bleachers to sit down and chat.
"Let's get her to the changing rooms," Violet suggest, taking Lacey's hand.
"Come on, Lace, let's get you somewhere quiet," Melanie tries quietly and takes the other hand to lead Lacey towards the changing rooms. Tears are streaming down Lacey's face as she gets pushed down on a bench carefully. She sobs and sniffles, her breathing slowing down a little and becoming more normal again.
"Are you okay, honey?" Violet asks carefully, her hand on Lacey's shoulder in comfort.
"Yeah," she sniffles and wipes her tears away.
"Will you be fine on the field?" Melanie wants to know. She'd never seen her best friend like this. Not once. She didn't know Lacey struggles with panic attacks.
"Yes," she snarls and gets up from the bench.
"Jezus, girls. Stop worrying about me, okay? It's one stupid panic attack. I'm fine, okay? I'm perfectly fine. Now get out there and rehearse some more with the girls. I'll be there in a few," she commands, startling her two best friends. Melanie takes a step back in fear, Violet takes a step forward, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Listen here, queen bee. I know you're still grieving and I know you want to do it on your own, but in some cases, you need someone, okay? And we're here for you. It's okay to cry in front of us, Lace. We're your best friends. You can cry and grief in front of us and we'll be there for you. Whether that's to give you a hug or cheer you up with puppy videos or listen to sad songs. Whatever it is, Lacey," Violet takes a breath and takes another step until she reaches her best friend. She puts her both hands on the captain's shoulders, "We're here for you."
"Oh shut it, V. I don't need you. Not a hug, nothing. OK? I'm fine," Lacey growls at her two best friends, then pushes past them to get out of the changing room.
"Shady bitch," Violet mutters underneath her breath, then follows Melanie towards the gym again. All of the Roosevelt Roses are standing in place, but no Lacey to be seen.
"Where'd queen bitch go?" Violet asks them, arms crossed.
"I don't know," one of the girls replies, "she told us to rehearse some more so we weren't sloppy tonight." Violet rolls her eyes. That's so typically Lacey.
"Alright, Roses. Let's take it from the top without queen bitch," Violet commands and plays the music. They do their routine without Lacey and it basically sucks. At least they'll be prepared for tonight.

Lacey runs through all the hallways to try and find her footballer boyfriend. All she needs is one kiss. Nothing more, nothing less. She runs as fast as her legs can take her, as fast as the tears are rolling down her cheek. She keeps running, until someone grabs her by the waist and pulls her to the side. Lacey lets out a shriek, but quickly silences when the familiar smell of Cole Steward enters her nose. With her back against his chest, she sobs a little more and lets out all of the sadness she still has inside her body. The boy holds her tight and sushes her sweetly.