Happier

Chapter 26

Cole and Lacey always talked about those movies in which the boy stands underneath the girl's balcony and sings a song to try and get her back. Like those 80's movies where they bring a boombox with them. Lacey thought it was beautiful, Cole found it unrealistic. And he's not wrong. It is unrealistic. And that's exactly why she's going to do it. After her talk with coach Rivers and seeing him in the hallway, she realized just what she needed to finish off her school year. Him. He makes her happy, happier than she has ever been. If these few months are the last ones she has with him, she actually wants to spend them with him and not fighting with him. 

So, because of his hatred towards those unrealistic scenes from 80's movies and their love for 70's through 90's music, she planned out what song she's going to sing and how she's going to do it. She knows whereabouts his room is, so she'll stand underneath the right window and she has practiced the song a couple of times, so she's ready.
"Stace!" Lacey yells when she sees her sister pass her door. The girl freezes and takes a few steps back. "How do I look?" she asks, showing the white dress she's wearing.
"Who are you going to try and win back?" she asks teasingly, wiggling her eyebrows up and down as she walks into the room. A slight blush creeps onto Lacey's cheeks. "You look super cute!" Stacey's cold hand finds Lacey's shoulder and they both smile. They know what's going to happen and they know it's going to go well. It just has to.
"Do you need a ride or?" Stacey suggests with a smile.
"Ah, no. I think I might walk so I can think about it and turn back if I get cold feet," says Lacey, but her sister raises an eyebrow, "I'm kidding, I'm going to do this." It seems like she's motivating herself more than she is reassuring her sister. But she needs it. She needs all the motivation she can get.
"Good luck, honey," says Stacey, a smile still on her face. She's so proud of her big sister. She's grown into such an adult now, it's almost scary.
"I'm leaving after lunch. Cole never wants to be annoyed before twelve on a weekend," she tells her sister as she sits down on her bed. "I think I might practice a couple more times and then head off," Stacey just nods and sits down next to her sister.
"Do you mind if I listen?" Lacey looks at her younger sister and thinks about it. They've seen each other naked, heard one another sing underneath the shower. This is fine.
"No, not at all. It'll be better if I practice in front of someone," Lacey replies and gets up again to stand in front of her sister like it's a real performance. She gets her phone out and starts the karaoke version of the song she's chosen, playing it on her little Bluetooth speaker she's going to take. The music fills up the room quickly. A soft melody coming out of the little square. 

"Never can say goodbye
No, no, no, no, now
Never can say goodbye"
She starts with her eyes closed, pushing away the fear that's building up inside her.
"Even though the pain and heartache
Seems to follow me wherever I go,
Though I try and try to hide my feelings,
They always seems to show
Then you try to say you're leaving me
And I always have to say no,
Tell me why
Is it so"
Her eyes open now, feeling a little more confident about her voice. Stacey looks at her with proudness written all over her face. Her head bops along and it's hard not to sing with her. The eldest keeps singing the song, her voice growing stronger with every chorus that passes. Her confidence growing with every note she reaches. Her mind keeps imagining her singing this in front of Cole's window and it gives her more anxiety the more she thinks about it. Near the end of the song, she pushes that anxiety away and gives her all for those last couple of notes. Her voice stronger than ever and with more confidence than before.
"I never can say goodbye boy
I got to have you
I never can say goodbye to you
Never, never, never, never, never, never, never"
The corners of Stacey's mouth curl up into a wide smile whilst Lacey continues to sing.
"I never can say goodbye boy
I got to have you
I never can say goodbye to you
Ahhhh"
When the music stops and Lacey stops singing, Stacey starts clapping her hands excitedly. The proudness in her eyes is still there, it never left. It was impossible to leave when her sister killed the whole entire three minutes of the song.
"He can't say no to that," the youngest girl says, causing the eldest to blush. Again.
"I think I'm ready to go," she whispers with a small smile. Stacey stands up and goes in for a hug.
"Good luck," she says in her sister's ear.
"Thank you," Lacey replies and grabs her shoes and everything she needs before leaving the bedroom. After putting on her shoes and saying goodbye to her dad, she leaves the house as well. She's nervous, but she can take it. You can't always get what you want, unless you work for it. Her mind races over all the possible scenarios that could happen. He could interrupt her song and kiss her. Or interrupt her song and tell her to leave his porch. Maybe he'll just listen and kiss her afterwards. Or maybe he'll listen and tell her to leave afterwards. Whatever happens, she'll have to go with it, but at least she won't hate herself for not doing it. At least she tried. Her train of thoughts is abruptly interrupted by the scene going on at the corner of her street. On the intersection between Maple Avenue and Grove Street, paramedics are running back and forth, a body lying in the middle of the road, a car parked right next to it. A clearly upset and in shock older man talks to a police officer, telling the story of what happened. Lacey walks up to the scene, intrigued of what happened and wondering if she knows the person who got hit. Her heart beats faster and a lump starts clogging up her throat. Cherry Hill isn't that big of a town, she might know the person. It's only when the person's face comes into view she freezes. Completely. Her heart thumps so hard it might as well just pop out of her chest and everything feels numb. Her legs, her arms. Her whole body went completely numb. That face she'd recognize anywhere. It's the face she'd look for in a crowded space. Her safety net. But this time, he doesn't smile. He just lies there, lifeless.
"Miss, miss," a voice brings her out of her trance and causes the tears to start falling, "I'm going to need you to leave," the officer tells her kindly, but Lacey doesn't move. She can't. She's frozen to the floor. So, she shakes her head.
"No, I can't. I-I.... That's my boyfriend," she cries to her, her tears streaming down her face like waterfalls. "What happened?" she sobs and wipes her nose with the back of her hand.
"I'm afraid I can't tell you that, miss. Go home okay. I'll tell his family to call you when he wakes up," she tries to come to an agreement, but the last sentence catches her off guard.
"He's alive? He's going to be okay?" Lacey watches over the woman's shoulder as the paramedics roll Cole into the ambulance. The woman nods.
"He's alive, but in critical condition. The paramedics are doing everything they can," Lacey nods her head this time. He's going to be fine. He'll be fine. Cole is a fighter. He has to be fine. "Go home, okay?" the girl nods again, but knows she won't actually go home. She turns on her heel and runs back home. Her legs can't keep up with her body, causing her to trip a few times, but she doesn't fall. She can't. She has to make it home and take her car to get to the hospital. The moment she makes it there, the ambulance whizzes past her house with loud sirens. The tears keep coming, as if there's no stop to them. As if her body has opened the taps and every bit of water just pours out.
"Lace, hold up!" her dad shouts before she can hop in the car. He'd seen her run up the drive way and the ambulance pass by. "What's wrong?" he questions when he reaches her at her car.
"Cole, at the-the h-hospital. I need to get t-to him," she cries and opens her car door finally, but her dad stops her.
"You're not driving in this state, I'll drive you," he commands and goes inside quickly to fetch his keys. Stacey exits the house after him with Sam in tow. The youngest gives her sister a sympathetic smile, reassuring her everything will be okay. The five get into dad's car and he drives off at full speed, ignoring some signs. No one's outside in their quarter of town anyway. In only a couple minutes, they arrive at the hospital. Cole's family is already in the waiting her. His mother is crying, a tissue propped up in her hand. She doesn't even give Lacey and her family a glance. Only Cara does. The ten-year-old gets out of her chair and walks up to Lacey to give her a hug.
"He's going to be fine," Lacey whispers to the little girl. A part of her is talking to herself too. She needs to reassure herself the boy is going to be fine. He has to be fine.
"He was on his way to you, Lace," Cara sobs into Lacey's shoulder, "He wanted to make it up to you." Those words make Lacey choke in her own tears. If only she had left hers earlier. Then they wouldn't be here now. He wouldn't have been hit by a car. Maybe she would've. But maybe that was okay. Cole doesn't deserve this.
"Hey," Frank starts as he walks up to Lacey and his daughter whilst Stacey, Sam and William go to take a seat, "You okay?" he asks when Cara has pulled away from the hug with Lacey. She wants to nod and tell him yes, but her tears take over again. Frank sighs and takes the girl in for a hug.
"I could've prevented it. I was on my way to him when I found him. If only I left my house earlier. I could've made sure this wouldn't have happened, but I wasn't fast enough," she rambles, sobs interrupting some of her words.
"This isn't your fault, Lacey," Frank tells her, pulling away from the hug, but keeping his hands on her shoulders. He bows down a little, so he can look straight into her eyes. "This is his own stupid fault. He's the one who should've prevented it, not you. This is not your fault," he reassures her sternly, looking her in the eyes until it has penetrated through her brain. Lacey nods, not knowing what else to do and goes to take a seat with Frank and Cara. She sits next to her dad, resting her head on his shoulder. She feels so lost not knowing whether he's alive or not. She can't lose him too. Not like she's lost her mother. He's the only thing she had left. The only thing she wanted to keep fighting for. He can't be gone too. That would be one cruel joke God has played on her.

Time passes by and the two families are still sitting in the waiting room, waiting for a doctor to come and get them. Cole's mother has stopped crying by now and so has Lacey and Cara. The latter has fallen asleep with her head on her mother's lap, Stacey on Sam's shoulder. Lacey couldn't shut one eye. She kept staring ahead of her, thinking of a world without Cole. It was cold and grey, empty.
"Mister and misses Steward," someone finally calls them. Dianna wakes her daughter up and all three stand up to go to the doctor. Lacey listens into the conversation, wanting to know everything that the doctor tells them.
"He's stable. Only a couple broken bones, some scratches and bruises. We've managed to stop the internal bleeding and stitched some bits up. He's still asleep now, but if you want, you can go and see him now," Lacey looks at the family with hopeful eyes, hoping they tell her to come with. But they don't. They just give her a small smile and leave the Goldberg family behind. It's okay though. They deserve to see him first anyway.
It takes the Stewards half an hour before they come out. Frank looks at Lacey and gives her an approving smile as he walks up to her.
"You can go and see him, Lace," he tells her, "We have to do some paperwork, but we'll be back later tonight, okay?" the girl nods and gets up to give him a hug. "See you tonight, kiddo."
"See you," Lacey greets back when they pull away and she watches him walk to his family. Then, she sighs. A rush of anxiety and sadness flows through her body. She doesn't want to see the state he's in, but she does want to see him. So, without waiting any longer, she walks through the first door and into the second on the right. There he is. Connected to beeping machines with thousands of wires. She scans his face for a moment. The face she has missed so much. His eyes are closed and he looks peaceful. His brown hair lays messily across his head. The bruises and scratches on his face make him look tough, yet vulnerable. She swallows the lump clogging up her throat and goes to sit next to him.
"I'm so sorry, Cole," she whispers and the tears make an appearance again. Her hand finds his, but it feels cold. "I'm not going to leave you now, not ever. I know it's going to get better. You're going to get better. You're a trooper, Cole Nathaniel Steward," she chuckles a little, but then turns serious again. "I'm not going to leave you," she repeats in a whisper-tone and presses a kiss to his cold hand. "Not ever."