Happier

Chapter 23

After a deserved, relaxing, and wild spring break, everyone has to go back to school. Ever since the party, nothing feels the same. Cole has been really distant towards Lacey, Archie doesn't talk to either of them, and no one has heard from Melanie and Violet. But that Monday morning, they had to face each other again. Not that they were ready, but they had no other choice.
When Lacey finds Cole at his locker, she takes a deep breath before walking up to him.
"Hey," she starts. He looks at her and gives her nothing but a smile, "I was wondering, since we haven't been going on dates with just the two of us, I thought maybe we could go to Lucy's tonight. Share a milkshake?" she tries. He still doesn't look at her, but just stares into his locker.
"I can't tonight. Cara and I are doing some sibling-bonding," he lies and Lacey knows. He is the worst liar ever, and she doesn't want to let it slip, neither does she want to fight.
"I don't think you two need any more bonding," she says with a chuckle.
"Well, we're still going to do it," he snarls and shuts his locker before walking away from her. She stands there and stares at him until he's disappeared into another hallway. An empty feeling washes over her. Something's going on, but she has no idea what. She needs something. Something to fill up the emptiness she's feeling. If Cole doesn't want to go on a date, maybe Archie might. She turns on her heel to head towards her locker. She passes people, but she doesn't really notice them. Her mind runs over everything that had happened in the past week. How she kissed Archie during spin the bottle, how her sister kissed Violet and how Violet and Melanie made out the entire time. They were wasted. Totally wasted. Nobody knew what they were doing anymore. Let alone anyone remembers. Maybe Cole does. Maybe that's why he's been so distant. Maybe he remembers what had happened. That she kissed Archie. Twice. That would certainly explain his lack of love and kisses.
Lacey's breath hitches in her throat when she opens her locker and the thought slips through her mind. He knows. He remembers everything that had happened and now he doesn't love her anymore. He hates her.
"Hey, Lace," a voice behind her makes her jump and a tear escapes her eye. She sniffles and wipes the single drop away before turning around and facing the ginger boy the voice belongs to. "Are you okay?" he asks, a worried look on his face.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she lies, faking a smile for his benefit. For her benefit.
"I was wondering if you wanted to do the English assignment with me," he tries carefully, holding onto his books tightly. Lacey opens her mouth to answer, but nothing comes out. Her mind goes over the possibilities, the consequences and everything in between.
"Err-yeah, sure," she then finally manages to say, but regrets it after she does. Can't go back now, but Cole won't be happy about it. In fact, he'll probably just hate her more.
"Cool, I'll see you in English then," Archie gives her a wink before backing up and walking away. Lacey draws in a deep breath. This isn't going to go well. How is she going to break it to Cole? They've been doing English assignments ever since they met each other. And that's not even the thing he'll be mad about. He'll be mad because it's Archie. Her ex-boyfriend. The boy she kissed at the party.

The day has gone by very slowly. During lunch, Cole was never to be seen, and so Lacey sat with Archie and the girls. In English, he didn't even give her one glance. Not even when Archie went to go sit with her for the assignment. She has to know what is going on and why he isn't talking to her. They used to be so honest and open towards each other, always saying why something was bothering them. Now, it doesn't even seem like they know each other.
When she finds Archie at his locker after school, she decides to up to him. Maybe he knows.
"Arch," she storms up to him without wanting to seem angry, but actually doing so.
"Woah, what have I done this time?" he looks at her, but then realizes it's not Loopy Lacey in front of him, but worried Lacey. No pouted lips, no furrowed brow, and her hands are just holding onto her books. "Oh, hey, what's wrong?" he now asks worriedly.
"Have you talked to Cole since, you know, the party?" she questions, not daring to look him in the eyes. What if she gets the urge to kiss him again? She can't let that happen.
"Err-no, he's kind of been avoiding me ever since," then, it finally downs on him, "Oh, my God. You don't think he's mad because we kissed during spin the bottle, do you?" his words are rushed and hushed, not wanting anyone to hear their conversation.
"It could be," Lacey whispers, now finally meeting his eyes. A flash of a mixture of fear and sadness go through her eyes and it scares Archie even more. "He has been avoiding me ever since. We haven't gone out on one date since the party and he's uses lame excuses to get out of them," she explains quickly. Tears are welling up in her eyes. She's so scared to lose him. He's the only thing she has left to live for. Without him, she's nothing. Like she thought she'd be nothing without cheerleading. Archie shuts his locker and grabs her by the shoulders to force her to look at him.
"Hey, you two are endgame, okay? You love one another way too much to let one stupid drunken kiss get in the way," he tells her sternly.
"We let one stupid kiss get in the way of us too," she whispers, bringing up their past. Archie sighs. He almost forgot about that. A memory he tries so hard to suppress. They were endgame.
"I know," he releases the grip on her shoulders and slumps his shoulders.
"If only I could get him to talk to me," she mumbles and that's when he suddenly grows a lot more positive.
"I bet he's at the diner tonight. That's where he always goes to write when he's upset," he tells her and she knows she's supposed to know it, but she just doesn't. Her eyes stay upon the ginger boy and watch him become more ecstatic with the second, "I'll drive you, if you want me to," he concludes his rant of which she hasn't heard a word.
"No, I guess I'll be fine," she says with a smile, "The last thing he'd want is seeing us two together. But thank you though," she reaches up to kiss him on the cheek before leaving him alone and getting into her car to drive to the diner. Her mind goes over the things she wants to say to him. She has to tell him so much, that she just forgets to breathe. It's only when she parks her car in the parking lot and breathes out the puff of air she was holding in that she realizes.
She takes her bag and all of her courage, and walks into the diner. Her eyes scan the room, trying to find that dark mop of hair. They halt upon a booth near the back of the diner and she smiles a little. Archie was right. He's hunched over his laptop, his face lit up from the screen and concentrated. She loves this state of his. All focused and sexy.
"Do you mind if I sit?" she asks when she reaches his table. He looks up, his eyes dark like the day they met. He leans back in his seat and crosses his arms.
"If you want," it sounds harsh and to Lacey, it feels like a knife through her heart. He's never harsh to her. He never snarls or curses at her. But right now, she feels like he might just do that.
"Cole, I-..." she starts when she's sat down, but Cole interrupts her.
"Please, Lace, safe your breath. Yes, I've been avoiding you and it's about time you confronted me about it," he snarls, looking away from her. Lacey wets her lips and tries her best to hold her tears up. This isn't the Cole she loves. Nor the Cole that loves her.
"I'm sorry about the party, baby. Please, forgive me? It was one stupid drunken kiss and it never should've happened," she rambles and the tears start welling up in her eyes.
"You really don't get it, do you?" Lacey raises her eyebrow, not understanding what he's on about, "This isn't just about the fact that you kissed someone else at the party, Lacey. This is about the fact that you kissed Archie and that it's almost the exact same situation we were in just a couple months ago. You cheated on Archie with me and now you're cheating on me with him. Do you know how that makes me feel?" Lacey opens her mouth, but before she can say anything, he continues, "No, you don't. You don't know anything about me, Lacey. You think my favorite color is blue, but it's not. If you really knew me, you'd know I said it's blue because that's your favorite color. Doesn't it ever occur to you how different we are? You like blue, I like red. You're a straight-A student and a cheerleader, for God's sakes," Lacey listens to him and everything just becomes clear to her.
"Was," she adds, her voice quavering.
"I'm the loner, damaged outsider, Lacey. I don't fit in and I don't want to fit in. And yes, meeting you was the best thing that's ever happened to me, but was it to you? How am I supposed to be sure that you don't skip off to your kingdom with Archie when you decide you want to be on top again? I don't want to lose you, but I don't want to be with you either if it means being uncertain of us. What if you kiss Archie again, mmh? I'm not a rebound for your dead mother or your footballer-ex-boyfriend who wasn't good enough for you," Lacey shakes her head and grabs his hand.
"No, you're my boyfriend, Cole," she reassures him, but he pulls his hand away.
"Until you're sick of me like you got sick of Archie. And now you want to go back to him. But it's okay, I get it. He's popular, and muscular, and hot, and he'll make sure you get back on top. He's everything I'm not and I get it. Just stop wasting my time," he shuts his laptop, grabs it under his arm and leaves the booth. Lacey gets left behind with tears now streaming down her face like waterfalls. She had just lost everything. Her everything. But he has never been more right. Knowing herself, she'd just get bored of him like she gets bored of everyone. She's damaged goods. She's a bitch. A slut. She's everything he's not. She's not kind, or loving, caring. She's just damaged goods.
A milkshake gets put in front of her, and even though everything is blurry from all the tears, she still notices it's a banana milkshake. Her favorite.
"Are you okay, sweetie?" Lacey looks up to see Lucey. She looks worried. Lacey sniffles and wipes her nose with the back of her hand, then nods.
"Yeah, I'm okay," she lies, but Lucy doesn't buy it. She sits down opposite the crying mess and leans her elbows on the table, her head in hands.
"Now tell me the truth," she demands sweetly. Fresh tears escape her eyes again at the thought of what had just happened. "Hey, it's okay. Drink your milkshake and tell me when you're ready, okay?" Lacey nods, taking a tissue out of her bag before blowing her nose. She sips from her milkshake a couple of times until she's completely calmed down.
"I think I just got dumped by the best thing that's ever happened to me," she sobs, her words unclear, but Lucy understands her, "his favorite color is red, for crying out loud. I should've known," she shakes her head, blowing her nose in the tissue again. Lucy frowns, not understanding that last statement. What does she even mean by that?
"How long have you two been together?" Lucy wants to know.
"Almost three months, I think," the girl replies. Now the elder woman understands.
"That's the point where almost every couple has a turning point," she starts, "Everyone I've met has had their first big fight with their partner at three months. It's crazy, but it's true. Now it's your turn to decide whether you want to continue with the relationship and work through all of your problems or just let the ship sail," Lacey looks at the woman in front of her, trying to understand her words.
"No, I think he made it pretty clear what he wants," she says, followed by a sniffle.
"But is it what you want?" and with that, Lucy gets up and gets back to work, leaving Lacey by herself. Now it's her turn to figure out whether she wants to fight for his love or let him go. All she knows right now, is that she needs her sister. And fast.
So, she drives home. Once there, she finds Stacey on the sofa with their dad next to her. Even better. Fresh tears roll down her cheeks as she lies down on her dad's lap. He startles a little at first, but then starts stroking her hair. None of them saying a word, just making sure the eldest is okay and calmed down before putting on her favorite Disney movie. Still then nobody says anything. They know she'll come to them when she's ready to talk about whatever made her upset. That's just how she's put together.