Thoughts of a Young Christian Woman: Faith Is A Funny Thing

I Will Thrive

What is perfection? Is it this universal standard that measures all things the same way? It just means without flaws, right? And what exactly is a flaw? What is the criteria for identifying a blemish?

When reaching for perfection, we tend to think it is the same for all; a standardized goal. But perfection and flaws are nothing but an opinion.

What you see as perfection, another can see it as flawed. You might call it a mistake but another may not agree. Whole societies differ on the idea of perfection around the world.

So, if you're going to limit yourself by trying to achieve perfection, why measure your flaws by the world's standards? Why rely on society to tell you your value? Meeting someone else's expectations should never be your goal in life.

As a teen, having my dad as the youth leader put a lot of pressure on myself. I felt like others were putting me up on a pedestal (whether that were true or not, I don't know) and if I did anything wrong, any little mistake, I was going to be knocked down and the fall wouldn't just hurt me, but deeply disappoint everyone I knew. That is no way for a Christian to live.

Trying to be perfect is binding. Every time I fell short, when I didn't act like a "perfect Christian", I felt so much shame and condemnation. Don't get me wrong, feeling guilty about doing something wrong is a good thing; that is what the Holy Spirit is for. But when we beat ourselves up for falling short of an impossible goal, we stop enjoying our salvation. Being a Christian then becomes a chore.

There is no such thing as a perfect Christian. Following Christ means we should love Him, and willingly follow God's word out of respect for the creator and fear of Hell. A relationship with Jesus shouldn't be a burden. When we fall short, which will inevitably happen for everyone, we are to boldly approach God with repentance. We ask for forgiveness and continue fighting the good fight. We shouldn't kick ourselves when we're down. There is no joy in that. There is no freedom.

I am very critical of myself, not just in my walk with God, but in life and in marriage. I am easily side tracked by the desire to be perfect. Sometimes I get bitter towards my husband because he's "not romantic enough" or "doesn't act like he should." I see things on social media of what the world expects out of a perfect marriage, and it can distract me from noticing all the amazing things my husband does. Instead of comparing my marriage to the world's standards, I should be comparing it to God's standards. It is the same for any relationship, including our relationship with Jesus.

The church is supposed to encourage and inspire one another. But we can look at other's salvation and use it as a standard of perfection, instead of keeping our eyes on God. This doesn't just cause us to doubt ourselves, but God as well. When a brother or sister receives a blessing, we may start to question why God isn't blessing us in our own lives like He is in theirs. I know I've had thoughts like that before. If that kind of thinking continues, it can lead to bitterness and jealousy towards friends and even God.

We should be constantly evaluating our lives and pray continuously to be in the will of God. But there is no freedom in always being afraid of doing something wrong. Christ said at the cross that it is finished. All your debts have been paid and you have been washed clean by His blood. Because of Christ's sacrifice, you have been made blameless in God's eyes. It takes faith to believe that when you fall, He will pick you up; when you fail, He will set you up for success.

You cannot thrive while living under the pressure of perfection. I was so caught up in what others thought about me that I became a miserable Christian. That is not what God wants for His children. It is time to break the chains. It is time to give God all your burdens. It is time to thrive.