The Boy From Oklahoma

Alana

Briefly edited. 

   I hate myself for crying in front of him. I hate myself for letting him see any weakness in me. I bury my face in my arms once more. 

   "Alana, talk to me. Me and the boys were just shootin' the bull. I never meant nothin' by it," he says. 

   "I thought you were different," I say. 

   "Shoot, we're all the same 'round here," he responds. I lift my head so I can look at him. I push myself to my feet, but he's still much taller than me. 

   "That's the thing, Travis. You don't even realize you're different. There's this little spark in you. You don't want to be good all the time, you want to go out and cause trouble, you want to explore the world, but you were always taught to be good and stay here in this little ass town," I say.

   He stands there staring at me with his mouth slightly open. I shake my head and turn to leave. He grabs my arm gently and turns me back to face him. 

   "I don't know what it is about you, Alana Scott. You get under my skin like nobody's done before. This place has started to change you. You may not see it, but I do. I like the change in you. You're happy here Alana," he says softly. 

   I gently but firmly pull my arm free. "I'm the same I was the day I got here. All I want is to go home," I say. 

   "What could be better than this place?" he asks, throwing his hands wide.

   "Chicago," I say seriously. 

   He chuckles, but there's no humor in his eyes. "You say a city with so much pollution is better than out here in the country with fresh air? I know you don't think that, Alana. I think you're just tryin' to put up a wall so you don't get close to me," he says. Slowly, he places his arms on either side of my head against the wall, giving me plenty of time to escape. I back up, feeling the wood against my back. 

   "I'm already inside your wall though," he whispers, his eyes staring into mine. 

   I think back to the last day of school when that nobody of a girl tried to sit with Katie and I at lunch. I lean close enough to kiss him and plaster that mean girl smile on my face.

   "You're not," I whisper before stalking away from him. 

*** 

   Travis shows up late to lunch, but I make sure that I don't look his way. I know I hurt him, but that was exactly what I wanted to do. Lunch is awkwardly quiet. The boys don't say much because of what went down earlier. MaryAnn and Dusty try to make conversation, but nobody says much. 

   Aunt Sarah sets her fork down with a clang. "Okay, what is goin' on here?" she asks. She makes eye contact with each of the boys, but they all drop their gazes. She then turns to look at me, and I hold her gaze. She raises her eyebrows expectantly. 

   "Nothing, Aunt Sarah," I say sweetly. Her eyes narrow at me. 

   "I, for one, will not sit at this table in silence. Y'all can figure out your own problems." She gets up with her plate and takes it to the sink. A moment later, the front door slams shut. 

   Nobody moves for a few minutes. Dusty finishes his food and gets up in silence. 

   "Thank you for lunch, sis," Travis says to MaryAnn. 

   "Fix it," she responds as she leaves the table. 

   I look to Kade to find him staring down Travis. I swear, Kade has a sixth sense when it comes to my problems. 

   Travis says nothing more and takes care of his plate. Kade follows him out. 

   "Alana," Shorty says hesitantly. I turn to look at him. "I just wanted you to know I didn't mean what I said earlier. We all like havin' you here."

   Trace and Caleb both mumble "me neither's" and "I'm sorry's". 

   "Thank you," I say shortly, getting up to take care of my plate.