Karma's Happenstance

The Devil's Joy

The Devil's Joy

Nikki Sixx POV 

People tend to call me the devil. Yeah,they have no fucking clue how right they are about this. I mean, fuck… I would easily sell my soul for fame and fortune. If I could find it somewhere that is. Some say I don't even have one. Again, who am I to argue? 

I fucking love to be evil. Love to piss off people. Love to make them fucking hate me. It really has a way of dividing the weak from the strong. These reactions from people keep me going and make me feel fucking alive. It’s almost better than being loved. Not that I have the vaguest fucking clue what that is. From neither the giving or receiving end of it. 

Being nice all the time and trying to never disappoint people is so fucking exhausting. It's far too much work. Especially when you realize that everyone has a touch of evil inside. Everyone lets someone down. Everyone has turned their back on someone. So I just am a jerk from the beginning and everybody expects even worse. So they place no expectations on me and can't be disappointed when I fuck up. I never give them a reason to like me in the first place.

Don’t get me wrong here. I’m not a nice guy playing evil. I really don't give a shit about people. I don’t fucking care about anyone but myself. I am 100% team Sixx and to hell with any other. I'm so fucking awesome I don't need anyone. My every desire is met with nothing more than a smile, my devil's smile. And believe me when I tell you this motherfuck never lets me down. Thank fuck I was born good looking.

So even having those Guns fuckers around, paying for their shit and letting them open for Crüe is not a pity party. I don’t do things like that. I have no fucking pity to give. It's an emotion I'm physically incapable of. No, I really don't give a fuck about those guys.If I’m nice to you, be aware, I’ll always come to collect. And I always get my pound of fuking flesh, one way or another.

Playing this fucker Stradlin is hilarious. I guess he reminds me of a shy timid me. Only not as good looking of course. But as much as I hate to admit it, we think a lot alike and have tastes for the same shit. And fuck no, this does not mean that I fucking like him. He’s such a fuck up, just like the rest of that lame ass band. He's just the fucking easiest target.

That crazy redhead singer is trying to tie this bunch of morons together as a band. Junkies, ego maniacs, gypsys, and clowns. Hummm, maybe they aren't all that different from Crue, except that they don't rock like us. Have to give him credit, he is a bad ass singer but everyone else is just plain average. Well, except Slash maybe. That boy may turn out as a real good guitarist. If he manages not to kill himself. And let's just say his chances are up in the air.

After I fucked with Stradlin and Slash a bit, I hear them leaving the suite. I guess they are on their way out to try to score. I can’t help chuckling a bit and my nose hurts like a motherfucker again. Stradlin, that son of a bitch! I really thought he’d maybe overdose and quit being a pain in my ass. But I underestimated the drug tolerance of that fucker. Maybe he’s not the wimp I thought he is. Have to give him credit for that. And for picking up that redhead chick. Damn, she is freaking hot. But a little to guarded for my taste.

And then I realize that they must have left her here. I'm pretty sure I didn't hear her or see her. Hummm. I sit on the edge of the bed and slide my legs in my leather pants. There's two chicks passed out in my bed. I lean over and bite one on the ass while I smack the other ones. "Time to jet," I say and stand up. I exit my room into a disaster zone that used to be a hotel suite. I wonder where Tommy is? I go to his door and turn the knob.

I stick my head in and see red long hair splashed out over the pillows. White satin sheets conform to a perfectly sculpted body. Oh wow...Stradlin did leave the chick here. I feel the corners of my lips tugging upward as I creep into the room. Stradlin...Stradlin...Stradlin, I silently say as I shake my head and approach the bed side.

I watch her sleeping so soundly. She glows like an Angel. She may even be one, who knows, cetainly not me. I gently sit at the edge of the bed. M eyes scn the room for signs of Tommy. No Tommy. Therefore I must assume it was Stradlin who got this lovely lady naked in Tommy's bed. Lucky son of a bitch. Oh well, no better time than now for me to get back at him for that.

I extend the backs of my fingers out to her bare exposed back and run them softly downward, stopping in her lower back.

She draws in a breath and stirs a bit, "Izzy?" She coos with a smile just before opening her eyes.

I snarl and roll my eyes. As soon as I'm done expressing this disgust she's got her eyes open and they meet mine. She jumps a little and tugs the sheet closer to her.

"It's ok Baby," I smile as nicely as I can, "I'm not going to touch you. Infact...I want to...uh, apologize for last night. I was...fucked up, yeah, so..." Mutter and mumble having no clue how to say 'I'm sorry'. I don't do sorry. And no, I'm really not sorry. I understand it appeared as if I was gonna rape her last night, but really, I don't think I would have. Maybe...I don't know. Ok, so maybe I would have.

Her expression hasn't changed. I just need to turn up my charismatic charm. 

"I've never been accused, charged, or convicted of any misdemeanor or felony rape cases. That's gotta count for something, right?" I say looking around for a fucking cigarette. I must have left them in my room.

"Then why didn't you stop when I asked?" She almost whispers and inches even further away from me.

"Because I was fucked up," I shrug, duh.

"And what if Izzy hadn't come in?" She barely manages to ask.

I bite the inside of my lip to keep from smiling. If stradlin wouldn't have broken down the goddamn door I would still be passed out next to her. And in the last hours, I would have rocked her fucking world. But no, that's not shit I should say. I should try to be more...more...fuck I don't know...not Nikki. Fuck where the hell is Tommy when I need him? He's way better with this mushy shit.

"I would have snapped out of it...eventually," I shrug. "I just couldn't help myself. Fuck. You saw how you looked last night...Who could fucking blame me?"

She's still silent as fuck.

"Come on, please don't be mad at me. I'm sorry. Really. Please let me make it up to you. What can I do?" Jesus, is it just me, or did that shit sound like begging?

But it must work because she gives me a faint smile. Imagine that. See I told you I was fucking charming and shit. She fucking bought it.