A few more minutes of unconsolable crying and I was ready to talk. I looked at the screen and Ali was looking at me worry clearly showing in her eyes. She tries hard to act strong but I know how much she hates to see me breaking.
"I'm ready" I said.
"Okay, whenever you're ready."
I told her everything that has been going on. I said how I've been failing my subjects miserably at school, I barely eat, barely sleep, and do nothing but wait for Jihoon to text or call. I told her how I was worried that he might have some groupie sleeping with him every night and that my worst fear was coming true -- that Jihoon didn't love me --. I burst out crying again and she just sat there waiting for my to cry it all out. I admit it felt so much better to cry and to be able to vent to someone who has been there for me forever. I looked up at her and wiped my eyes.
"Sorry. I didn't mean for our skype session to be like this..."" I trailed off. Ali just smiled and shook her head. She understood that I needed this time and that no words needed to be said. She knew that if I ever had any questions or doubts about anything, that i'd soon realize the answers all by myself. I did need some clarification though, so I asked her. "Do you think he still loves me? He's been so cold. He never calls me anymore and he's always in a rush to get off the phone whenever we do talk."
"Rina, he loves you. We all know it. He's just probably really busy or tired. Why don't you surprise him and visit him out on tour?"
That was what I've been planning actually since our anniversary was coming up but with the way things were going, I didn't want to pursue it, no matter how much I missed him.
"I don't know, Ali."
"Go. Ill go with you if I need to. You both need to talk. personally."
With that I sighed heavily and felt myself get really tired.
"Thanks a lot for everything, Ali. I need to get some rest though. That was really tiring what i did just now. I'll sleep on it and I'll let you know if ever I decide to go. Thank you and I love you for everything!"
