Lame comebacks! You hear them every day right?! Well I am sick of them, and I bet you are too. In this chapter I am going to have a scenario that has happened to me and the lame comebacks that others have said. Enjoy my children.
Okay so first lame comeback is your mamma! Everybody has heard that more than once.
I was bolting down the street trying to catch Belle ~ my fat dog if you don’t remember. She had gotten out since my idiot dad after I told him ten times to shut the bloody garage door forgot to. Well anyway, she had gotten to the end of my street and stopped to sniff dog shit, this was my chance. I snuck up on her and placed a smackos down on the footpath. I hid next to it in the long grass so she couldn’t see me. I whistled; her head shot up and turned. She noticed the food straight away and waltzed over. When she bent to eat it I snatched her and somehow managed to hold her; I start carrying her home.
I was crossing the road when two grade 8 boys scootered towards my direction. “Shouldn’t it be walking?!” The smallest one said in a know-it-all voice.
“No, as you can see SHE not an IT doesn’t have her leash. Now, shut up and leave me along.” I said back, and started to walk again.
“You shut up you slut.” The other one yelled back smirking at what he thought was a good comeback.
“Ahahahahahahahha, don’t they teach you anything these days little boys?! Look up the word slut before going around shouting it to random people.”
“What so you’re calling us dumb now?”
“I never said that!”
“Well, we do know what slut means,” the littlest yelled quickly.
“Hmmm?!” I smile turning around to listen. “I’m all ears.”
“Your mamma is…..” There it was the lame comeback.
“What you say about my mamma punk.” I say pretending to get angry. “Talk about her again and I’ll rip your tiny balls off, deep fry them then force you to eat ‘em.” I shout in a Yankee voice.
Yeah, they rode off like no tomorrow. I turned back and walked home laughing my ass off.
Okay, so there it was the lame comeback for your mamma! Seriously what is with it?! It isn’t even a proper comeback. It was a boring excuse for a memory anyway, but the only one I could think of where I actually said something back instead of laughing. Oh wait there is another one but it is short. Like really short maybe a sentence or two.
Okay here it is:
My sister and I were fighting over random shit.
“Shut up you’re fat!” I yell at her, we call each other fat all the time so it isn’t bad.
“Your mamma is!” She spits back.
“She is your mamma too dickhead,” I laugh and we both seem to laugh it off.
Told you it was short. If you have a memory of your mamma comebacks send it my way I want to hear it! Comment it below and if you want it put in the chapter pm me it so I can add it under mine and my sisters fight.
Next lame comeback is one used often in our childhood but some just can’t seem to let go of it. You have guessed it: I know you are so what am I?! Or how ever you have heard it. It is so annoying and useless.
My cousin and I were having an argument about shit knows what. She was 10 and I was 13 at the time of this lets say disagreement.
“Just go away, you are more annoying than a pest!” I spat at her, walking off to my room.
“Well you’re more annoyinger!” Lacey yelled back running towards me.
“There is no such thing as annoyinger you dickhead,” I say rolling my eyes. ~And don’t worry about the language guys she has a foul mouth~
“I know you are you said you are so what am i?!” She smiles thinking she has outsmarted me.
“You’re stupid actually.” I shut my door on a surprised face. Yeah, my comeback wasn’t good but it shut her up in seconds.
Like I said above tell me yours, I know you want to. Why do people still use it?! It was never ‘cool’ or whatever so why; tell me?!
List of more lame comebacks:
· I'm not listening! – Fuckkkk this one pisses me off. Obviously you are listening.
· Go dig a hole and die in it
· That’s what she said
· Talk to the hand
· Takes one to know one
· Did I hear something?! Nah must just be the wind!
· Blah. Blah. Blah. That’s all I hear coming out of your mouth
~There is way more but I can’t be bothered. If you have some comment them below~
