Angels {Brendon Urie/Panic! At The Disco} -COMPLETED-

Ian's Jersey

After the service, I literally couldn’t take two steps without somebody patting my on the back and mumbling something along the lines of ‘’I’m so sorry for your loss’’, or ‘’I’m here if you want to talk’’.

Of course, being polite, I smiled and thanked them, but on the inside, I just wanted to get away from everyone and everything. I wasn’t feeling any happier after they’d said it and it’s only out of sympathy anyway.

I’d spent the last hour in the corner with Jon and Ryan. Ryan was in such a state, bless him. I knew how close him and Ian were, it broke my heart to see him like this. Ryan’s one of those people with the cutest faces that if you see them upset, you instantly want to cry. So after that, Jon was stuck with the job of taking care of Ryan and I.

Around the seven PM mark, I decided that it was time to leave. I wanted to get home and go to sleep in one of Ian’s t-shirts and not wake up. I kept my head down and weaved in and out of the crowds to exit the building and get some air. Just as I thought I’d escaped the last person, I heard Brendon.

‘’Natasha, wait up,’’ He took a slow jog towards me,

‘’You leaving?’’

I nodded and he opened his arms. I took no hesitation to walking straight into them and giving him the biggest hug ever. I hadn’t seen Brendon all day, aside from when he made his speech, and neither had anybody else. I knew that losing Ian must have hit him really hard, as it did everybody, but Brendon mostly.

Brendon and Ian had this really special bond, and when Ian decided it was time to quit the band and stop touring with them, both boys were distraught. There must have been a reason, but I never got it out of Ian. And now I never will.

‘’You wanna come back to my place?’’

‘’Are you sure you want someone in my state hanging round your neck?’’ I looked up at him and he looked down at me, shaking his head.

‘’Don’t be stupid, we need each other’’.

I nodded and he took me towards his car.

--

‘’There’s a couple t-shirts in the spare room if you wanna get changed, they’ll be some shorts too’’ Brendon called out as I slipped off my shoes. He was already in the kitchen pouring out some kind of spirit for us both.

‘’Brendon? Do you have anything of Ian’s I could wear?’’ He turned to me, ‘’It’s not that I don’t want to wear your stuff, it’s just I miss Ian and-‘’

Brendon touched my arm and nodded. I followed him into his bedroom and he opened his wardrobe. He pulled out a pair of grey shorts and handed them to me. He then dug out and old jersey that had ‘Crawford’ printed on the back.

‘’I kept it when he left it here, but you can keep it if you like’’ He handed it to me and I looked at it, shaking my head.

‘’I’ll wear it, but you’re keeping it. I’m not taking this from you Brendon’’.

He nodded and gave me a small smile before exiting the room. I quickly changed and then sat down on his bed. Brendon’s room was full of photos and memorabilia. He had another jersey that had ‘Ross’ on the back, slung over the end of his bed. There was a box full of Spencer’s drum sticks on his dresser and old pop bottles full of guitar picks. I found it really sweet that Brendon had kept all this stuff, it showed how much he cares about everybody.

I noticed that there was a framed photo on his bedside table. I carefully picked it up and examined it. The photo was of Brendon and Ian in the tour bus. They were playing FIFA or something and Ian was about to hit Brendon over the head with a pillow. I looked closer and saw that they had the biggest smiles on their faces. I’d miss that smile.

‘’Hey do you want-‘’

I turned to face Brendon, unaware that I had tear droplets trickling down my cheeks. He came across the bed and put his arm around my shoulders.

‘’I miss him too,’’ he whispered, wiping the tears from my cheeks, ever so gently.

‘’It’s okay to cry’’.

I rested my head on his shoulder and I felt him press his lips against my temple. He then leant his head on top of mine and whispered something that I couldn’t quite catch. He carried on whispering and then, when I managed to make out what he was saying, I realised that he was very quietly singing ‘Always’. That song was my favourite, I’d always get the guys to use that song as sound check. I was happy that Brendon had remembered.

‘’You remembered’’ I whispered, looking up at him. He half smiled, looking down into my teary eyes.

‘’I never forgot’’.

~a/n I thought this was really cute, please comment/vote/add. I'll update soon:) thanks*