To Hell and Back (Samlaena fanfic)

A Voice

Come to me Aelin.  Use the power that lies within.  Take it, let it consume you.  Use it.  It can't hurt you.  Let it take control.  Feel the flames.  They want more, need more.  Take take take.  Use it until it's power is gone..

I wake up with a jolt.  No it..it can't be back.  I won't use it.  I can't use it.  I turn to look at Sam.  All of my fears suddenly melt away.  Sam was stirring all night. He is lucky I didn't slap him. After all a beauty queen needs her rest. I got up before hin today. We are supposed to be docking by about 10. Right now its only 7:30. I go to my suitcase and grab a book-or maybe two- and get back in bed. I could only bring like six books in my luggage, as the rest of them wouldn't fit.  Sam is having a friend of his send the rest of our stuff overseas.  He was also able to get us a place to stay for a little while. Come Aelin.  Take take take.  I hear the voice again. No, no i will not use it. That demon will stay inside of me.  I get out of bed and change. I put on a turquoise tunic with a small gold dragon embroidered on the front.  I slip on some black pants and my usual black leather boots. I also put a few daggars at my side.  Quietly i creep up the stairs to the deck. I watch as the sun rises over the water. It makes the water look like a thousand jewls glowing under the light of sun. I love the smell of the sea. It's calming. And ever since we got here...well I can't help but notice a hint of pine and snow in the wind. It feels like i've known the scent my whole life. For all of time maybe.  I might be able to tell what it's from if i shift-"No stop thinking that way!"  I tell myself out loud.  "Thinking what way?" Sam says from behind me. I turn around and face him. He kisses me good morning. "It's nothing Sam I promise." I tell him. He rests his chin on my shoulder with his arms around my waist. "You can tell me whenever something's wrong Celeana." I nod my head. "I know, i just don't want to talk about it." He sighs. "The only way you'll get over it is by talking about it." I pull out of his grip. "Sam i know you want me to open up and i love you, but i just...can't." He lets out an exasperated sigh. "I love you too Celeana but...well if this," he points between the both of us, "is going to work then we need to open up to each other." I shake my head. "Sam I don't want to talk about this right now." Sam stalks off the deck back to our room. I go to the small benches in the front of the boat and sit in silence listening to the waves. As i'm sitting i see a white tailed hawk overhead flying near the boat. It looks beautiful and so full of grace as it glides on a breeze. The smell of pine and snow wafts to me again. It's so relaxing. Take it Aelin. Take the power smoldering within. Use it. Let your flames take hold and it will all go away. Use it, shift and be free. Not again! What the hell is that nagging voice. I-i can't use my powers, I don't even want to use them. Hell, I can't even shift! But...it did say if I shifted and used them enough they would go away...yes that's right, all of your trouble will fade away if you simply just-I run away from the deck. I won't listen to it. I rush down the stairs and into my room. Sam is sitting on the bed sharpening a dagger he bought years ago. "What's wrong?" He asks me. I sit next to him. After i sit i begin to cry and he takes me in his arms. I tell him everything that has been happening over the past few days. About the feeling in my gut, the voice, and my nightmares. "It will all be ok. I promise you." We lay back on the bed and just stare at the ceiling. "But what if it never goes away?" I ask him. He gives me a casual shrug. "Then we just try our best to ignore it." Easy for him to say, he doesn't have to deal with it morning, noon, and night! "You can be a little annoying sometimes you know that?" I say to him. He leans over and lightly flicks my nose. "You mean like that?" I roll my eyes as a smile tugs at my lips. "Asshole." He laughs. "I love you too." I grumble and turn over on my side and grab the book i left on my small table beside the bed. Sam gets up and leaves the room, no doubt going to ask the captain how much longer until we arrive. He has hated being on this boat for so long. Practically the only reason he hasn't started swimming is because he knows this is our escape from Arobynn. I don't mind it as much. Speaking of Arobynn, when Sam comes back i need to change his bandage. I wait for his return but he doesn't come back. I put down my book and go search for him. I look on all the lower floors and don't see him. Then i ask the captain and he points me upstairs. When i reach the top of the boat Sam is standing on the ledge. I run over to him. "Sam what the hell were you thinking standing up there!" He shakes his head in confusion. "I...I don't know how i got up here. The last thing I remember is going to ask the caption where some nicer inns were in Wendlyn." I grab his hand to help him down. You didn't think that escaping me would be that easy did you Aelin? I hear the voice say. I take Sam downstairs –almost sprinting off the deck– and sit him on the bed. I grab our medical kit and unravel the bandage around his arm. The stitches have held up well. I still can't remove them. I take the bandage wrap from the box and a small tin. "This may burn." I say to him. I apply a salve I bought at one of the stops our boat made. He hisses. "I told you it may hurt, but it's making sure that you don't get an infection." He nods. "Yea ok." After his arm is wraped Sam lays down. "I think I'm just going to sleep from now until dinner." I yawn. "That's not a bad idea." I crawl up beside him and rest my head on his chest. Sam kisses the top of my head. "I love you." He says. I smile. "I love you too Sam."

What is the strange voice Celeana is hearing? Who or what caused Sam to almost jump off the boat ledge? All will be answered in the next chapter. Sorry this one took so long i just am busy with another project at the moment. I often have writers block with fanfics so it can take a while to get more chapters out. Thank you all for being patient and i hope you have a good rest of your day!
~Sunshine 💛