The Hulk who broke Santa
It was early Christmas Eve and Santa Claus was already tired. Present delivery would start in a few hours and with his little green helpers going on strike about their slave status and shitty conditions, he was working alone.
By the time he'd loaded the sleigh, he'd downed four bottles of mead and so nobody could blame him for doubting that the huge green monster standing before him was real. After all, who in the North Pole had ever seen someone other than him over 4 feet tall.
It was only when the monster roared "Hulk want special gift," and blew Santa over with the force he realised that this was actually happening. As a man in his late 700s, it's not surprising his bladder control left him.
He lay in the patch of yellow snow as the beast walked towards him. From this perspective (the bottom of a fourth bottle of mead), it seemed almost... attractive.
The beast flexed its muscles, already torn pants tearing further. "HULK WANTS SANTA AS A PRESENT!" Santa mentally shrugged. Its not like his life could get worse. The beast reached for Santa, righting him before dragging him back to the sleigh.
Santa bent himself with drunken precision over the side of it, unbuckling his pants and spreading his legs. The beast removed his own scrap of clothing with an ominous rip, releasing his throbbing North Pole.
Santa turned away in horror, his head bouncing off the side of the sleigh and knocking himself out.
When he awoke two days later, it was with a lingering hangover, no memories of Christmas Eve and an absolutely shredded arsehole.
