Being Shot

P h o t o #9 - Black Cotton Coat

P h o t o #9 - Black Cotten Coat

I stretched out the knots in my back as I walked into my room after a warm dinner on a Thursday night. After all of the crazy events last week, ending in visiting Cooper's extravagant house, I was grateful that this week had been a bit on the quieter side.

I thought about how undeniably slow the past sevens days had been, and how I had yet to encounter a jealous girl during them. In no way was I complaining. I actually thoroughly enjoyed not being pestered by them. It almost made me miss the days of me being a complete shadow amongst my peers.

Suddenly my thoughts shifted towards the boys. Elliot hadn't shown up to school Monday through Wednesday, and when he finally did come back around after his absence he basically ignored all of us, only offering soft grunts in contribution to our conversations. I had asked him what was wrong countless times, but he made sure to quickly brush me off with a slow stare that told me to not inquire. I even made an attempt to get information from Parker about it, but all he had to give me was that Elliot gets in moods sometimes and we couldn't do anything about it. It seemed that Jonas and Cooper agreed.

I wasn't dumb, I knew they were definitively hiding something from me.

I sighed, knowing fully that it was none of my business, but for some odd reason I just couldn't help my mind from redirecting itself to worrying whenever I tried in vain to forget. After mulling things over and going through the garbled events of the past three weeks, I realized I had, somehow, come to think of these boys as something similar to well suited acquaintances.

Of course I understood that they were the main cause of me to slamming my face into a tree and breaking my camera in the beginning, but now that I processed the events over again, I guess I've put it behind me, even if it still bothered me to high-heaven when I went to reach into my bag for my camera only to come face to face with my cruel reality all over again. that I can't take pictures anymore. Even if I've already started saving up for a new one (it would be just too bold of me to ask them to buy me another one, even if they were incredibly rich and at faults, I just can't see myself asking), it didn't keep the pain from resurfacing every once in awhile. What could I say? I'm a relatively forgiving person, after all.

My mind swiveled back to the main topic at hand, and began making the realization that I hadn't had something even remotely close to a friendship for longer than I could remember.

'Maybe that's why I just can't seem to soundly leave them alone.' I contemplated. I guess that somewhat explained why it made me just a little bit upset knowing they were keeping something from me when we were always around each other.

'Wait, wait. It's really none of your business, Emma. It could just be that they don't think too much as me, which wouldn't be too surprising. I am just a girl who was unfortunate to get under their radar to them.' My temples began aching as I continued my mental escapade, 'Maybe they've even gone as far as thinking of me as one of the other vexing girls that won previously, or even worse, as a complete burden.'

I have my head a vigorous shake to clear all of the bad thoughts that swarmed my brain like bees to their nest. Looking for any type of change of pace, I walked over to my night stand. I grabbed the water bottle off of it and pulled my two daily pills out of their speckled purple container hidden at the bottom of my top drawer. With a large gulp of water, the pills went down in the blink of an eye. I silently hoped they would soothe my mind for the night.

'That should calm me down.' I thought, stepping over my littered floor and making my way to my plush bed where my trusty laptop lay still on its charger.