Speak. on hold until summer :/

Chapter 8

Okay, here's the mini chapter I promised! Full update hopefully by Sunday(:

Harry

Every bang of the door sends knives through my heart. Maddy’s cries for help soon turn to shouts of anger that rip me in half.

I'm not sure where the nick-name Maddy came from. It just seemed right. Madelein is for old ladies and quiet passive girls. Right now she's quiet, but as I get to know her better, I can see her true head-strong personality. 

This afternoon went nothing in the way I had planned. When I took her on the roof I thought we’d be able to get to know each other and I could tell her why I needed her help getting my mother off of my back. I would tell her all about Lucy and everything would work out. Of course I scared her by making her sit on the ledge. How was I supposed to know she was bloody afraid of heights? I thought only children had that fear.

When she started panicking, I did as well. I did the first thing that came to mind and tried to carry her away from view of the ground. She was so flustered, it made me laugh a bit inside to how cute she looked. Not that she is cute, she’s one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen. Her soft hair put me in a trance, and those lips. I almost kissed her. I would have kissed her, but I once again, I panicked and asked her for help without telling her why.

And what if I had kissed her? I know Lucy will never return but I feel as if I am betraying her memory every time I look at Maddy. Niall would throw a fit as well, he hasn't admited it to me, but I know he's smitten for her. I can hardly get through a conversation without him asking me some random question about her.

None of this would be a problem if I would just talk to her, but I can't get the words out in a way that doesn't make myself sound like a monster. 

I know it is wrong to leave Maddy out there in the cold, but I can’t let this dinner party happen. If I know one thing about my parents, it is that they will marry me off if it takes strapping me to a pole at the altar. I will wait one hour and then hint to Niall that she’s up there. It won’t be long enough to hurt her, but it will throw the dinner into chaos.

After half an hour Maddy finally stops pounding on the door, easing my guilt. When she isn't making a sound, I can pretend she's not there anymore. I know it is stupid and selfish, but I can't very well go and open up the door now. She'd probably lock me out or pitch me off the roof. 

Before I change my mind, I pull myself off of the stairs and go to find Gemma. She's a girl, maybe she'll know what to do. 

I walk back downstairs to the library where I find her- no surprise there. We may not always get along, but she shares my passion for reading.

“Where have you been?” She asks not looking up from her book. “Mother was looking for you. Something about your coat tails for tonight.” She laughs knowing this means at least an hour of my mom trying to get me into formal clothing for dinner.

“Oh, here and there. I need some advice." I start, still hovering in the doorway incase a quick escape is needed.

"Is it about Isabelle?" She now sounds interested and puts her book aside.

"Who the bloody hell is Isabelle?" I ask. Maybe Gem isn't the help I need right now.

"My brother, the poet." Gemma laughs. "She is the girl who's coming for dinner tonight. You two used to play all the time when you were little. You called her Belle."

Now I remember. That girl was a demon in the body of a child. She used to boss me around and always got us into trouble. Of course she always came out as the perfect angel and I was the nuisance who needed a good spanking. If she is anything like she was back then, tonight will be even more painful than I thought. 

"Ah yes, she was...pleasent." I say. "Well tell mother I've pitched myself off a cliff and have no more need for coat-tails." 

"What about the advice?"

"What color coffin should I ask for?" I say walking out of the room, not bothering to close the door which I know will get on Gem's nerves.