I can't make direct eye contact with Holtz for the rest of the day, doing everything in my power to avoid her. I even leave early, telling everyone I'm exhausted as an excuse. When I get home, I take a shower and try to watch some television to help ease my anxiety. When that doesn't help, I go to bed and hope I can sleep off the embarrassment so I can have a normal day of work tomorrow and not have to spend it avoiding the person I actually want to be around most.
Laying in bed, trying to sleep, the image of Holtzmann standing inside the shower room, looking at me completely naked, will not go away. I toss and turn, trying my hardest to shake it out of my head; trying to convince myself that it wasn't a big deal, because she obviously wasn't fazed by it. If I can just fall asleep, I know I'll wake up feeling completely better about it.
----
When I do wake up, however, I find this to not be the case. In fact, I feel even more embarrassed, which I didn't think was possible. I debate calling in, pretending to be sick or something, so that I don't I have to think about the current object of my affection walking in on me naked. But I know I can't; I promised Holtz I'd get that equation done as soon as possible. I could always work on it from home.... No! Erin Gilbert, you are a grown ass woman, stop being so immature and just go to work!
When I get to the firehouse, Abby and Patty are already there. Abby is sitting at her desk, thoroughly engrossed in whatever she's looking at, and Patty is sitting on the floor with a laptop and our case files, trying to organize them on the computer. She's been working on this for quite a while, hoping having it digitized will help with ease of access and keeping them backed up in case of a disaster.
"Hey, guys," I mumble, both women looking up at me.
"Well, it's about time you showed up," Abby says teasingly. "You left early and got here late, that's very uncharacteristic of you."
"Yeah, I was just really tired, you know. Busting ghosts and what not." I laugh nervously, trying my best to lie convincingly.
"Girl, I get it. No one wants to see me without my beauty rest," Patty says, looking back down at the paperwork.
"Well, Holtz already left to get lunch so you're gonna have to find a snack here or go get something yourself," Abby says, also going back to what she was doing.
"Alright. I'm just gonna head upstairs and work on some equations. Yell at me if you need me."
I walk upstairs, relieved at the revelation I won't have to walk by Holtz to get to my desk and can take a moment to prepare. I sit down and arrange all my pens and things accordingly, then pull out the blueprint of Holtz's new prototype and get to work. Soon, my mind is completely lost in the equations.
A little while later, my thoughts are disrupted by a brown sack being dropped in front of me on my desk. I look up and Holtz is smirking down at me, causing my heart to skip a few beats.
"I got you something from the sandwich shop. I think it's your favorite." She muses.
I open the sack smiling, and indeed she has gotten me my favorite sandwich; Philly Cheese Steak Melt. My heart swells knowing that she's paid enough attention to me to know my favorite sandwich order.
"Thank you, Holtzy. It's sweet of you to know my orders." I open the wrapper and look at the sandwich. "You even got extra cheese!"
"Only the best for you, Dr. Gilbert," she winks and I feel my face redden slightly. "May I pull up a seat and eat with you?" She asks.
"Of course," I answer calmly, but thoughts of yesterday are still running through my mind, sending waves of anxiety through my body.
She grabs the chair from her lab and pulls it to the front of my desk, taking a seat and grabbing her own sandwich out of the bag, and unwraps it. I roll the blueprint back up and set it aside, making sure we don't get any food on it. We eat in comfortable silence for a few minutes and I let my eyes wander carelessly to Holtzmann. Her fashion sense is so crazy, I'm pretty sure the only person who could pull it off would be her. But jeez, she definitely pulls it off. Today, she's wearing a light brown vest with a bright purple button up shirt, the top few buttons left popped, exposing just a little bit of her cleavage,(Not that I'm looking...) and dark green suspenders. Her pants are also dark green with black leather biker boots. I have no idea why, but she looks so ridiculously hot. Honestly, she looks hot in everything I've seen her wear.
"Listen, Gilbert," she starts, pulling me out of my trance. "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you yesterday, walking in on you and stuff. I, personally, don't mind if other people see me naked and I guess it didn't occur to me that you might feel differently. I know that's why you've been avoiding me. And I didn't do it in a sexual way or anything, if you're worried about that. I-"
"I wasn't worried about that." I interjected, maybe a little too quickly. I definitely don't want her to think I wouldn't accept sexual advances.
"Well, good." She chuckles lightly. "But I won't do it again. Cross my heart." She makes a show of crossing her heart and I laugh. She smiles with me and I can't help but to think again, for millionth time, how beautiful that smile is. "Unless you want me to, of course. I definitely wouldn't turn that down."
She winks and I reach out and smack her arm. "Don't ruin it, Holtzmann," I tell her, laughing.
She rubs her arm dramatically and scrunches up her face. "Ow, that hurt! If you hit like that normally, I'd love to see what you could do in the bedroom, hotstuff." She winks again and I shake my head, taking a bite of my sandwich to hide my red face. If only she knew how what talking like this did to me...
