Healing ||mileven||

Mike's list

El stood outside Mike's door and hesitated, almost afraid to knock, afraid of what the next few minutes could hold. She knew she had to confront Mike, but was so scared this would be the end of their relationship, that he would confirm he didn't love her, or worse, loved someone else. She knocked, "come in!"

Mike watched as his door opened and El walked in, closing the door behind her. She didn't look at him, instead keeping her eyes down. "Hi El" he said, trying to get her to look up.

"Hi." She was stood near the door, almost hugging herself. Mike cursed himself for ever letting things go so far, for not seeing how his behaviour had confused her and made her feel.

"El?"

"Yes?"

"Please look at me?" With that she looked up towards Mike, her mouth opened slightly and she took a sharp intake of air. Looking around the room she saw it had been decorated, all around the walls were pictures, all featuring her, most of the both of them together. She smiled when she saw he'd made cut-outs of eggos and hung them from the ceiling, like snowflakes at the snow ball he's so cheesy she thought, she loved that about him. "I have something for you" he said, handing her a single white rose, El was stunned, not knowing what to say.

In his hands, he nervously held a piece of paper. He did a fake cough to clear his throat, "my feelings for Eleven," her breath caught in her throat as he started reading from the sheet...

"I love her smile, it lights up my world

I love her laugh, it cuts through sadness like a knife

I love her heart, it is pure and good and full of love and kindness for others

She is funny and smart

She is brave and loyal

She is strong and vulnerable

She kicks ass, like seriously (a small giggle escaped El's lips)

She always knows how to make me feel better

She is broken yet unbreakable

She makes me want to be a better person (tears were forming in her eyes)

She is beautiful, inside and out

She loves eggos far too much (another giggle escaped through her silently falling tears)

Despite my multiple fuck ups she always forgives me, I hope

(He wasn't reading from the sheet anymore, instead looking her directly in the eyes, moving closer to her with each line)

I love everything about her

I will always be here for her

I will always protect her as best I can

There is nothing I wouldn't do for her

I love her with all my heart and soul

I love you El"

El had never felt so close to Mike, she thought she knew what love was before, but this, she was struggling to deal with it, to contain it, to understand it. It scared her if she was honest, to need someone so much, more than want, desire, it really was need, to be without him would to be without oxygen, she couldn't breathe without him, she couldn't live without him. And she needed to show him, she was never good with words at the best of times, but they failed her completely now.

Mike looked into her deep brown eyes, falling more in love with every second, they were still young, but he knew what he felt, he couldn't ever imagine being without her. He leaned in slowly towards her, gently taking her waist in his hands pulling her towards him, but not wanting to rush her, or make her feel uncomfortable. El let him pull her close and met his lips with her own, at first the contact was gentle, but soon their movements became more passionate, they parted their lips and sunk deeper into the kiss, showing each other what they couldn't say with words. Suddenly, El pulled away, taking deep breaths and leaning her forehead against Mike's. "Are...are you ok?" he asked, worried that he'd done something wrong. El just looked into his eyes and shook her head, she took a step back, breaking his grip on her waist but still looking straight into his eyes, and there she stood, to Mike it felt like minutes were ticking by, "El..."

"No" she said, interrupting him. Mike opened his mouth to speak, but she cut him off, "no Mike, stop." El was summoning the courage to say everything she wanted to say, her head was down and her eyes closed, she took a deep breath and looked into Mike's eyes, "Mike, you always say to use my words, to find ways to express myself, but sometimes they aren't enough, sometimes there are no words, sometimes what you do in one moment can mean more than a thousand words...please, right here, right now, no more...no more words, I want, I need, to show you. Understand?" He just nodded. His heart was racing...she started to close the gap between them and suddenly it was like gravity had taken over, a magnetic pull between them making their bodies collide never to be parted. It wasn't frantic, but it was close, a release of all the emotions built up from years of pain, of joy, of fear, of passion, of denial, of love.

Later that afternoon, they lay facing each other, holding each other, a perfect moment that they never wanted to break. "I'm sorry," said Mike, breaking the silence. El frowned, not understanding his apology, "wh..."

"El," he interrupted, "I'm sorry for making you feel that I didn't want to be with you, it was never my intention...I was...I was scared."

"Of me?"

"No! Never" he insisted, sitting up. "Look, El, you really are truly amazing, and in years to come when you experience more of the outside world, when you see what you could have, who you could have" he said, closing his eyes and turning away from her, "I didn't want you to look back and think I took advantage of you, that I stole this from you...you can do so much better, El, you deserve so much more than I can give you."

"Mike, look at me", she said softly. He looked at her reluctantly, she looked into his eyes and, caressing his face, she smiled and said "you're an idiot Michael Wheeler. You are my world, no-one will ever compare to you, you are the kindest, bravest, smartest, cutest man. You are my touchstone. And if I can't have you, I won't ever settle for anyone less, I would rather be alone for the rest of my life. I love you Mike." Mike's heart swelled, he had never felt so happy, so complete.

"Come on, we'd better get dressed, everyone will be here in like 30 minutes" said El softly, releasing his face from her hands and slipping out of bed. She put on one of Mike's big t-shirts temporarily while he found something suitable for her to wear from his closet. When he turned back she was sat on his desk, flicking through a book absent-mindedly. He just couldn't stop gazing at her, she was beautiful, and his heart belonged to her. She looked up and caught him staring, yesterday he would have looked away, embarrassed, but not now, now he just walked up to her, running his hands up her thighs while parting her legs so they were either side of him. "30 minutes until they get here?" said Mike, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

"Mouthbreather" El said through her smile, she laughed and then kissed him.

End

A/N so, that's the end. I hope the 3 or 4 people that read this liked it, it was literally the first Wattpad story I wrote and I'm pretty happy with it. Obviously, some loose ends etc, but I wanted it to be reasonably tight, story-wise.