Time Makes it Harder (JohnLock)

Please Don't Leave Me/It Is What It Is

(A/N I couldn't choose a title for this chapter, so I put both. I guess you guys can choose and go with whichever one you think it best.

Kisses! A💘&M💫)

John wakes up the next morning, a feeling of dread in his chest at the empty space in the bed next to him. He jumps out of bed, throwing on a hoodie and exiting the flat without any breakfast, tea or brushing his teeth.

He texts Sherlock countless times, calls him until he can't bear to hear his voicemail once more. Wandering around London, he checks every alleyway he can find, asking at every hospital, until his legs are screaming for rest and his stomach is begging for food. He walks back to the flat, dejected, hurt and wishing he knew where Sherlock was. It would make him feel so much better.

He needs to make sure that Sherlock knows that he loves him, deduction skills or not. And it might actually be nice to have a fully functioning Sherlock instead of zoned out in his mind palace all the time.

He walks to the kitchen, and start boiling water for  tea, knowing he's hungry but not sure if he can eat. His head is sweaty and his legs are ready to buckle from under him.

The door opens and slams downstairs, and John assumes it's Mrs. Hudson, until he hears the slow, troubled footsteps coming up the stairs. The door opens and he throws the teacup into the sink to meet Sherlock at the door.

His eyes are red, his hair messier than normal. One sleeve is rolled halfway up his arm and I can see small purple marks and bruises. His head is hung low on his chest and his back is arched into a hunch.

"Oh, Sherlock." John helps him to the couch where he gratefully sinks into the plush fabric. "Sherlock, why?" John asks and he peels the damp and sweaty robe off of Sherlock, wiping his hair away from his eyes. John sees clear tear stains on his cheeks, and fresh tears that begin to fall.

"I'm sorry. I thought it would help my mind. I know you don't want me to but... " His voice cracks and John has tears in his eyes that are threatening to fall. "I'm sorry John, I thought it would help me." From his lips comes a heart wrenching sob that makes John begin to cry.

The 2 men sit on the couch together, grabbing clothing and pulling each other close, crying into each other's shoulders.

"Please John. Please don't leave me." His voice cuts out because of the tears and his body shakes with grief.

"Never." John holds the back of Sherlock's head as Sherlock buries his head into his chest, tangling his fingers in the taller man's hair. "But," John's voice cracks. "But it is what it is."