Lethal Lullaby

Pressure

It's almost the end of term, I'm looking forward to summer with just Matthew and I, no school anymore and no interruptions, it sounds like heaven to me. I know I should be thinking about college applications, but the truth is my head isn't in it. I only applied to make my parents happy, but in truth I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I know I want to become a devil and I know I want to be with Matthew, but as for everything else I have absolutely no idea. I will talk to them about taking a gap year when I think the time is right.

It was a normal cold, dreary morning as I got out of bed, I found the usual note from Matthew. I was ready within the hour; my hair had been washed making it look squeaky clean and shiny and hang comfortably past my shoulders. It has gotten very long, but still it looked nice with its natural waves. I wore a pair of blue ripped jeans, a dark blue top and a black cardigan with a pair of blue dolly shoes and my usual black school bag. I also wore the beautiful locket that Matthew had given me, I never take it off. I gazed at its insides frequently, I love having a photo of him close to my heart always. I like carrying his book of poems about with me too, that way I can read them anytime I like. They are a real pick me up when I'm feeling low or insecure about my relationship with him. I know how much Matthew loves me he tells me all the time, but I still can't quite believe it and if it was taken away from me I wouldn't be surprised. It's not healthy being in a relationship with someone who makes you feel these feelings because of how perfect they are. But, that isn't his fault it's just my insecurities and I need to get over them. No matter how many times I read them they always bring a tear to my eye. It was so romantic of him to get them bound for me, and it looks like I have heard the last of these poems since Matthew prefers to sing to me now. Not that I mind, I will treasure these poems always and I will look forward to every song. In a way, he just sings the words rather than speaking them, and some would say that is even more romantic. And, he even does it with a guitar what more could a girl want.

I lifted my freshly printed photographs from the table in the hallway and flicked through them one by one. Matthew and his family certainly did stick out like a sore thumb, they were so beautiful and perfect compared to everyone else. They looked like they had been perfectly sculpted then photographed, if they didn't stick out before they definitely did now. It's just much more obvious when you put them all together. They mean a lot to me now, well most of them do anyway. I am looking forward to becoming one of their kind in the future. I finally came to the pictures of Matthew and me.

He stood there, beautiful, his eyes were as green as the grass grown by mother nature herself, his lips were as red as the blood running through my veins, his skin was as white as the clouds that form in the sky and his hair was as brown as the bark on a tree. He stood a tall 6ft 1, he was just perfect in every possible way and this picture would be beautiful if it wasn't for the pathetic girl standing next to him. My eyes were a washed out blue, my lips were a drained red, my skin was as lifeless as that of a dead corpse, but my hair was long, brown, and wavy it was my only saving grace. And my dress and wedges did help quite a bit to make a plain girl find some prettiness thanks to Hayley.

You only need to take one look at him, then at me and you can see how drastically different we are, but I guess that's what makes us compatible. Even though I don't look anywhere near as beautiful as Matthew in this photo, I will frame it. Only because I would like to have a photo of us together up in my room, and I can stare at it when he isn't with me.

As I approached the kitchen door I found Gwen and Ryan with the video camera out, I peered round to see what they were pointing at.

Oh, my god I can't believe it! Summer was walking at just a year and a half old, she is such a quick learner and growing up so fast. I know I saw her stand the other night, but I didn't know she could actually walk. It feels like it wasn't so long ago I was holding her in my arms for the first time.