The Wedding Issue

Chapter Twenty One - The Awakening

I was floating amidst the deep, cold waters of some foreign ocean in what seemed to be a dimension beyond time and space. It was soundless; tranquil, simply euphoric. The water was crystal clear, and there wasn't any life between it than that of my beating heart.

Was it beating? I couldn't quite tell anymore.

It was familiar, yet unkind. It seemed hostile but it felt uncharacteristically safe. It was ice cold when it should've felt temperate. I simply floated, unaware of time, unaware of emotion, unaware of the tragedy that struck me and broke half my bones and knocked the spirit right off my body.

Is this what it feels like to die?

I decided that I didn't mind being here. I felt nothing. That was good for a change; feeling nothing. I couldn't even feel my own face. I traced my fingertips against each other and I couldn't feel my smooth skin brushing against itself. What a peculiar feeling!

There was a lightning bolt that broke through the surface of the water, rippling through the depths of the ocean and sending me deeper into the abyss. I showed no resistance

'Don't go down there', a voice followed the blinding light.

I turned around to greet the unexpected guest. It was a little girl, about eleven years old, with deep, blue eyes and hair as bright as the moon against the dark sky. Her skin was pale and fragile, just like the nature of her body.

What could a pretty girl like that be doing in a place like this? This was no place for children.

'Who are you?', I asked the pretty little girl.

'I'm the soul that lies within', she said.

'What are you doing here?'

That's when the first pang of emotion hit me square in the chest; pity. I felt sorry for the little girl. She looked lost and all alone. I wonder what happened to her that made her come to this place.

'I'm trapped', she said.

'I'll help you get out of here', I promised her.

'You can't, not unless you leave with me.'

'But I like it here. It's so quiet and peaceful over here.'

'Then I'm afraid there's nothing you can do', she said and began to turn around and fade away.

'Wait', I halted her.

Another lightning bolt broke through the waters, and with that I felt something else; fear. I didn't want to be here all alone. I feared loneliness. I panicked.

'Stay with me. We could be friends', I offered.

She looked at me and smiled fervently. It was a warm and beautiful smile. It reminded me of myself back in the day when life wasn't as complicated as it was now.

Alive.

Dead.

Existing.

I wasn't sure what has become of me anymore. The thoughts in my head were all jumbled up. I couldn't make sense of left and right.

'Why are you trapped here?', she asked me.

'I'm not sure. I don't remember what happened to me.'

'That's what happens when you stay in this place for too long. You start to forget who you are. I don't even remember my own name', she complained.

'I don't remember my name either', I began to realize.

It was something with a G. Or was it a J?

Judith? Jordan? Jacklyn?

'But you do remember something', she broke through my thoughts.

'How did you know that?'

She was right. I do remember something, or someone. A man. A hazel-eyed man with messy hair and broad shoulders. He had a smile that was contagious and a touch that was gentle.

'Hold on to that thought. It's the only thing that could get us out of here', she said excitedly.

That was easier to do than I thought. He was the only thing that was clear in my mind. Everything else was nothing but a blur.

Another emotion bubbled in my chest; hope. I had to get out of here. I had to find my way back to the hazel-eyed man. He will save me.

Another lightning bolt came through, but this time it reeled us closer to the surface rather than push us deeper into the ocean.

'You're doing it. You're getting us out of here!'

I've never seen a child happier than the little girl who floated above me.

'Give me your hand', she said as she offered hers.

I placed what seemed like a gigantic palm into her tiny, munchkin, warm hand. That's when I realized I could feel her skin. Her warm, baby-like, smooth skin. I felt a jolt of peacefulness consume me. I felt safe and comfortable and surrounded by love.

'I still can't feel a pulse', she told me.

'You don't?'

'All charged. Clear', she said.

The next lightning bolt that followed blinded us with light. The peacefulness was gone. I didn't feel safe or comfortable anymore. I felt pain running through my spine, coursing through my body.

There was a lot of light. I couldn't make out the blurry faces that hovered around me. There was an incredible ringing in my ears that I couldn't stand. I wanted to tell someone to make it stop but there was something in my mouth.

And then it went dark; pitch black. The ringing finally stopped.

'We got her back', a deep, manly voice said.

I tried to open my eyes but my eyelids wouldn't cooperate. My body was too tired to want to wake up.

'Go back to sleep', the little girl whispered in my ear.

'You'll feel much better once you've had some sleep.'