Liar, Liar

Chapter 6 - I Want Bubbles and an Umbrellaaa

Fern has been knocking on my door every ten minutes for the last two hours. I want her to leave. Hell, right now I want her to move out. I need alone time, and that's what I have been shouting back every time she comes knocking, but she is as persistent as a donkey and won't let me be.

"Elisabeth Bleu, you can't stay in there forever!" she shouts impatiently. I try to remind myself that I love Fern like a sister but right now it's getting harder and harder to remember that.

"I'm not, it's been two hours! Now go away!" I yell from my bed where I have been hiding ever since it happened. I want to crawl into a hole and die, I'm so embarrassed. What was I thinking? Did I think he was going to leave her for me? Did I think that that would even work out? Did I think?

"B, what even happened?" Fern questions, noticeably lower in volume than before. I feel sorry for the neighbors, we've been at this for a while now.

"Nothing, everything is perfect."

I sink further into my pillow and screw my eyes shut. I'm such a girl, lying in bed crying over a guy that never was and never will be mine. There are so many things I regret and so many things I wish I had done. I regret never saying hi. I wish I did. I regret feigning disinterest. I wish I was honest. I regret that day in May three years ago. I wish it never happened.

May 3rd 2014

I plop down by my desk heavily, throwing my bag to the floor and hanging my thin jacket on the back of the chair. The sun beams through the windows like nobody's business, I notice some other students trying to close the curtains, but they're stuck. I don't mind it though. I'm more than ready for summer and sun. I'm going to get a tan this summer, however hard it may be for me.

I turn away from the window and glance at the guy walking past my desk. His name is Adam Cooper, I've been sitting in front of him in this class for the whole semester, but I can't find it in me to turn around and start a conversation. Either he is talking to his friends or the professor is speaking. The time is never right. However, I know I wouldn't either way. I will always find a reason not to.

Mr. Johnson lectures us for forever, and I find myself almost falling asleep in my hand. It's 8 in the morning, shoot me. Just as I am about to blink for the last time before I actually drift into sleep, I feel a gentle tap on my shoulder. I know exactly who it is and I turn around apprehensively.

"My pencil keeps breaking, could I borrow one of yours?" Adam asks, pointing to the several pencils I have laying on my desk. I nod feverishly and hand him one, smiling a tight-lipped smile. My mind tells me to say something, but my body turns back towards the front before it can work up a sentence.

At the end of the lecture Adam lays the pencil on my desk while walking past, thanking me all the same. I force out a small "You're welcome", but he doesn't hear because he is already halfway out the door.

After all my classes are done with, Ashley meets me in the campus park with donuts for both of us.

"Tnaw, thanks, Ash," I coo and take a bite of the delicious donut, before I remember something. "Oh, I need to return this book to the library today before my time expires."

"Now?" Ashley says, her mouth full of pink glaze, sprinkles and donut.

"Yeah, it'll only take a minute, it's right around the corner." Leave it to Ashley to not know where the library is. It's not that she's uneducated or a "stupid blonde" as they say, but usually she just orders new books online if she needs them. Perks of being rich, I suppose, not having to lift your ass off the couch.

We walk to the school library in five minutes. The librarian is busy with something and when we walk closer to the desk, I see that she is assisting the one and only Adam Cooper.