boundaries | e.d

S e v e n

Ethan

When I'm around her a different part of me comes out - compelled by my connection towards her. The old Ethan would deal with his emotions, feel them harder than the rest of the world would. I tried so hard to bury that part of me, but every minute spent next to Riley, is another dig into the filled grave.

I let out a deep sigh, coming to the conclusion that I'm bound to unravel in days. Every time I remind myself to stay away, I find myself that much closer to her instead. To say I was fearful would be an understatement. I've kept so much inside of me for the longest time that if she were to break into me, she'll open up my heart to everything. But conquering my demons is what I needed to do, in order to keep feeling this way.

The second I saw her being goofed upon by the gang, every part of me questioned myself. She screamed innocence and purity, sustaining that image despite the corruption around her, and for once I wanted to be good again. The more she pushes me, the more I wanna be pushed. It's like being dehydrated of your soul and within one persons eyes, your entirety is full again. That must be what keeps dragging me towards her. The fulfillment she grants me, and the foreign happiness that consumes me when she laughs - reminds me of what life should be made of.

And above all, her beauty draws me to her in a way I've never been attracted to someone before. Like a child, my heart flutters when her hair is moved from her face, and I grow excited when I know I'll be seeing her.

But the Ethan I've created thus far is too developed to ever abandon him. If I selfishly cling to her out of the liveliness she brings me, I could end up corrupting her in the end. I did it to my family, to Grayson, to myself. I looked over to her in knowing that she deserved better and raised the blanket to her neck, dreading pulling my touch away.

Then as I started to fall asleep I realized that for once I wasn't alone, and neither was she. We had each other. In the most incompatible way possible, we were happy with having each other.

Riley

My eyes squinted open to a blinding sun that was reflecting off his mirror. I took a deep breath in to yawn, surprisingly feeling his strong arms surrounding me. I stopped breathing in fear that I'd wake him up, or lose his touch. My eyes slowly looked away from his arms and up to the mirror resting on the floor in front of us - his head was nestling in my neck as if he whispered sweet nothings to me before falling asleep.

In his sleep he looked at peace, warm hearted, and harmless. I rolled over, craving to see his fave in front of mine. His head lifted up as I did so, nestling back onto the pillow bellow him as his arms adjusted to my new position. He was too sluggish and dazed to realize we were tangled. Instead, he hazily opened his eyes and smiled at me, making me feel warm and fuzzy all over.

I couldn't help but smile at the child-like reaction I had towards him, then continued to admire his beauty. He opened one eye, curious to see what I was doing I assumed, "You're staring." He closed his eye with a smirk evident on his face.

"Oh," I blushed, not wanting him to get an idea I was crazy, "Sorry."

"I didn't mind." He chuckled before getting out of bed. "How'd you sleep?" He asked, rolling on the sweatshirt he picked off the floor.

"Good actually," I eased up, rolling on my side to face him. "Your bed is really comfortable." I yawned, feeling the silk sheets.

"Are you sure?" He seemed concerned again, which confused me after everything being fine between us.