boundaries | e.d

O n e

My idle mind granted me unwanted anxiety while my brothers' girlfriend attempted to convince a bouncer I was 21 years old. The whole ride here she bragged about city nightlife, and how being 17 years old should be fun - not spent in my room the way I preferred to. The bouncer then looked at me for any sign of agreement with my best friends argument, but the flannel and toms gave off the impression that I had no means of being here.

To avoid his glare, I turned away and stared out at the busy sidewalks of Chicago - taking into account the diverse crowd. I always found it fascinating how every person had their own story, own current issues, and unique reasons to be both happy and upset. Those thoughts and assumptions of everyones lives kept me busy as my best friend continued her persuasion. I finally looked back at her, questioning why she always looked beautiful, and I always looked washed out.

"Well I think you're being very rude." Natasha crossed her arms while I stood behind her, trying my best to keep the front she told me to.

"Listen lady. You either show me her ID or you go home." He shook his head and reached his arm out behind her to check the rest of the line for identification. Natasha huffed like a child and pulled my arm off to the side.

"Can you believe that guy?" She scoffed, pulling her phone out with a purse to her lips.

"We could always do something else," I suggested, crossing my arms in attempts to warm myself up from the breeze under the buildings.

"No," She looked up worried, "You wanted a fun night and that's what I'm gonna give you." Her phone buzzed and she looked back down again. I sighed and stared back at the line, realizing everyone was dressed the way Natasha was, and as always, I was the sore thumb.

My feet naturally began to shift in place from my growing insecurities. "Come on Nat," I began to complain, "Let's just go home and put on a movie."

"No way," She shook her head still texting, "You're brother's on his way and we are gonna celebrate your birthday-"

"You invited my brother?" I squealed, ripping the phone from her hand. She quickly retrieved it back, furrowing her brows at me for not wanting him to come.

"He's your brother. Of course I asked him to celebrate with you. It's an important day!" She put her phone in her back pocket as she lectured me.

"I'm turning 17. It's not that big of a deal."

"Every birthday is a big deal." She sighed from the constant battle of cheering me up tonight. It wasn't her fault though. Every birthday reminded me of the death of my parents, and how alone I've felt since they've passed away. Nothings been the same since they left my brother and I to fend for ourselves.

"I'm not just not in the mood to see everyone," I truthfully admit. It wasn't my brother I was trying to avoid. It was the group of friends that followed him everywhere he went.

"Maybe tonight he'll show up alone." Natasha forced a smile to me, knowing she was lying. I gave her a look that her prediction was dumb, and she shrugged in defeat. "Just ignore them. I'm sure they'll put your interests first tonight."

I heard obnoxious laughs and voices echo from down the block, indicating the gang had shown up right on time. Natasha grabbed my hand and whispered, "Just be nice" before they got close enough to hear. I pulled my hand away and crossed my arms again, already uncomfortable. All of them acted so normal despite the lifestyle they live in, and it disgusted me. My hair flew against the cheeks on my face while everyone got closer to us.

Ryder casually held his arms wide as he approached Nat who had a growing smile on her face. She jumped in place before running into his arms. Everyone cheered as he picked her up easily, tilting his chin up for a kiss.