All characters in this story have no existence or whatsoever outside the imagination of the author and have no relation to anyone having the same name or names. All incidents are merely inventions.
Pagbubukas
I can feel the scorching heat of the sun on my skin. I am experiencing again to breathe in the air that I wish to forget. The smell of the place that I really miss. Did you ever feel to be a tourist in your own home? Did you ever feel like running away again after hiding?
Deciding to come back to the place where I was born and raised still has a different effect on me. Five years of my life I spent working far away from home. Almost different races were with me but they could not fulfill the affection I needed. Iba rin iyong pagmamahal na mula sa totoo at kadugong pamilya. What if you don't have a family to call your own? Mas nakakahigit yung kayang ibigay nila. My job was not easy kahit pa malaki ang sahod. It was difficult but I have to endure all the pain just to find my purpose, my worth, and peace.
"Liv, are you really sure about your decision?" my colleague asked as I struggled to carry my luggage. I've been thinking about this so many times.
"Of course, I've been working there for years wala na akong plano mag appy ulit at magkaroon na bagong contract." I replied.
"Err? We will miss you and thank you for helping me and guiding me, Liv. I am saying this because I feel like this will be our last conversation, I know you have something in your mind..." she said sadly.
"I will try to contact you but I can't promise" sagot ko.
Buo na ang aking pasya uuwi ako, pamumunuan at sisimulan ang naiwang negosyo. Mayroon akong napundar para buhayin ang sarili ko and I've been doing that for years. Masasabi ko bang natupad ko na ang pangarap ko? Napuntahan ko ang mga bansang gustong gusto ko pero may kulang. Hindi madali ang magtayo ng negosyo but I have been planning about this a long time ago
Kasalukuyan akong nagpapahinga sa shop to check my social media accounts. Inaabangan ko ang kaibigan na mag online.
Makalipas ang dalawampung minuto, sa wakas online na si Mauwee. Impossibleng walang load ito, adik.
" Hi, Mau. I miss you" I sincerely said.
" Miss you too, Friend" she said
Bakit kaya basang basang ang babaeng to?
" Mauwee, bakit basa ka? Pauso ba yan ,wet look? " tanong ko
" Nandito kami sa beach ngayon, kasama sila Kuya at ibang batchmates natin. Small gathering lang just hanging out like the old times. Where are you? " paliwanag niya
Oh! I missed that place too. We used to go there before, we will ditched class just to go there. Nakakaakit kasi ang tubig ng islang iyon at ang mapipinong puting buhangin. She said that she's with her Kuya and it's not impossible that he's there too...
" Nasa Pilipinas na ko, Mau. Ganon ba? Kumusta kayo dyaan?" nakakainggit naman
" Umuwi ka na kasi. I think nine years of hiding from him is enough. It's the right time to face him. Napapagod na din ako sa kakatanong niya. I don't think na mapapagod siya sa kahahanap at kahihintay sayo. He's so persistent to see you. And your family is asking me of your whereabouts." she explained natamaan ako sa sinabi niya at natahimik.
"I will go home soon so don't worry" I almost lost my voice.
I wasn't hiding because of him, I hid myself because that's what I needed and I left my family too. I thought, I was strong but I wasn't brave enough to face him and everyone. Why?
" I see. Ba't niya naman ako hahanapin? Don't tell my family, Mau. I trust you na wala kang sasabihin sa kanila. Please..." I pleaded
" Ouch! Ano ba? Wag ka ngang makulit!"
Mukhang naiinis si Mauwee. May nanggugulo yata. But why is my heart reacting like this?
" Ano ba?" " Wag ka nga!" patuloy na anas niya.
" Mau, anong nangyayari sayo?" tanong ko sa kanya
" May makulit kasing nilalang dito." pahayag niya.
" Sino?" bigla siyang nawala sa screen. Hula ko may humablot sa phone niya.
" Ano ba yan!? Sino kasi yan?" nakakainis hah, may kausap yung tao eh.
"Relax. It's just me." Well, what? That voice. I miss that voice. I was literally shocked muntik kong matapon ang phone ko. Bakit? Bakit?
" Hey! " napabalik ako sa aking ulirat dahil nagsalita siya.
" Bakit nasa iyo ang phone ni Mauwee? Nasaan si Mau?" nakayanan kung hindi mautal pero yung puso nagkakarera na.
" Stop with your games, Liv. I will find you. I will bring you home, to your family" banta niya.
" You can't, Gabb. Hindi ako magpapakita sayo." I will bring myself home soon, I promise to face my family again but not you.
" You're selfish, Liv. Nakaya mong baliwalain lahat. I get it that you will never forgive me but please go home for your family, especially to your Mom." pakiusap niya
I feel so sorry for what I have done to Mom, I really do. I hurt her, I made her cry, suffer and still blaming myself. Hindi ko naman sila binaliwala, oo limang taon akong hindi nagpakita sa pamilya ko pero kinakausap ko naman sila.
"Ayaw kitang makita. Ayoko. You're not good for me. You will never be. You will fool and use me again. I don't want that to happen!" singhal ko
Bakit ganito ang puso ko? Bakit ikaw pa rin? Hanggang ngayon ikaw parin kahit anak ka ng taong yon...
"I don't care if you think like that of me, Liv. Magpakita ka na please."
Dahil sa kanya natuto akong mag sekreto kay Mama, I hurt Mom because of him and for listening to my heart. Dahil sa kanya nagawa kong manakit ng iba.
" It's been a long time and I still hate you" singhal ko ulit.
Tumawa siya ng mapakla sa sinabi ko "Have you been at peace hiding like that for years? hmm "
Yes because that's what I really need. I was finding the peace that I wanted. That's a necessity for me.He tried many times to get my attention pero hindi iyon tumalab.
" Mahahanap din kita kung hindi man I will wait for you na mahanap ang daan pauwi . You really hate me that much, huh. Answer me!"
"Yes! Bye!" pinatay ko na agad ang video call na iyon.
I really hate him for what happened before. I wanted Gabb to stop. Hindi kasi nila ako naiintindihan. Hindi man nila gusto ang desisyon ko but I like my decision so much. Sa mga nakaraang taon nakapag desisyon ako ng gusto ko, yung hindi ako kontrolado ng iba. They never let me to decide for myself. What's wrong of chosing myself and made my own choices. What's wrong with that?
