Sanitizer
My brothers were mad at Dad for letting me study here in Villa. They were really against with my decision. Kaya nga hindi nila ako tinulungan. Nag-alala nung una si Ma pero kalaunan naging masaya naman siya, mabuti nga raw at pumayag and Dad.
Whole summer we traveled a lot mostly in Visayas, I was really happy but I could be more happier if Ma was with us. Ayaw niya kasing harapin ang Dad. Pero malapit na ang birthday at magkikita na sila ulit. Wala pa namang final decision kung saan gaganpin ang birthday ko, mas gusto ko dito lang Villa para lahat ng kaibigan ko makakapunta. Hindi naman ibig sabihin na hindi nagta-travel ang Mama, minsan ang kasama namin nila kuya ay ang Mama.
Gabb invited me again to eat lunch at Consola's Garden. At first I hesitated dahil napapadalas ang pagkain namin sa labas. Ayon sa kanya lunch lang yung tiyempo niya para makita ako. Minsan pag maluwag schedule niya hinatid niya ako at minsan na ring nasundo sa school.
"Oopsie! Hi Liv. Kamusta?" Sianna said to me enthusiastically
Ang plastic talaga. Hindi mo ako madadala Sianna. Mapagpanggap ka.
Sa dami ng lugar bat dito pa? Umiinit talaga ang dugo ko sa tuwing nakikita ko siya kahit anino niya lang. That swimming pool scene flashed in my mind again. How could I forget that?
Wala naman talaga siya kasalanan sa akin siguro hindi ko lang matanggap na nagkaroon sila ng ganoong ugnayan ni Gabb. Siguro naiirita din ako dahil nararamdaman kung gusto niya si Gabb. Ngayon pa lang kailangan ko nang itaas ang mga bakod.
"Your IG feed looks great. Very aesthetic. I saw your recent post nagbakasyon ka pala sa Siquijor" I know she wanted to have a long conversation with me I won't give her that.
"Thank you, Sianna"
Walang buhay kong sagot.
"Ahmm... are you with Gabb?" talagang naiirita na ako.
"I have to go"
Humalakhak pa siya nang pino.
"Siquijor hah!, Siquijor. See you when I see you"
Tumawa siya ulit. I won't wish just to see you.
Maybe she's thinking that I would be intimidated by her. Funny. I know you fancy Gabb, too. So what if I traveled to Siquijor? Did she think I'd use love potion to get Gabb? She truly believed in that myth! I don't need fucking love potion to get someone.
"Natagalan ka yata"
"Yeah I accidentally had a talk with your ex" malutong kong tugon.
Halatang nagulat siya.
"Ex? What are you talking about? I dont get you"
Napakabilis na yata magbago ng mood ko.
"Let's just eat, okay?"
Bakit ayaw niyang aminin na ex niya si Sianna? Hindi ba? Ano yong nangyari sa pool?
Kailan mo ba kasi ako tatanungin? Matagal na akong handa.
"I think we should stop eating out"
Mariin naman niya akong tiningnan.
I've been thinking about this, I do like him but we should really stop eating out. I could bring food to save money. We're spending too much and basically we're not using our own money.
"Why?... I'm paying. If you are really concerned then hati tayo sa bill" hindi ko alam kong galit ba siya dahil ngumisi eh
"Gabb" I hold her hand "I like eating with you a lot"
"Then why are you suggesting that we should stop?"
He's drinking now.
"Hindi mo ba naisip na magastos itong ginagawa natin. I can cook, I can bring lunch for us. Pwede naman tayong kumain kahit diyan lang sa tabi-tabi."
Kahit saan lang naman kami kumakain noon lalo na nung nandito pa sila Rojan at ang ibang barkada.
He smiled at namumula ang kanyang tainga.
"I don't like it because it's expensive and we are still using our parent's money"
Napayuko agad ako.
"It's not from my parents Liv. At night I work at my Dad's resort para magkaroon ng pera so I can date you" namumula parin ang tainga at parang gusto niyang matawa.
I once told Mama that I would never date a man if he would use his parent's money. I have wronged him for thinking ill about him. He's working, I thought he would not do that because they are rich and he's still studying.
"I'm sorry but please let's stop eating out. Hindi mo naman kasi obligasyon na dalhin ako dito o sa mamahaling establishments"
"But I want to..."
"Gabb, please don't be stubborn"
We're not yet official. Tapos ganito ang pinag-uusapan namin. What will happen if we're really officially dating?
Bakit ba kasi hindi mo pa ako tinatanong? I was actually ready to have a boyfriend the was problem he had never asked. I haven't asked permission to my Dad and to my brothers. Once na magtanong ito pasensiyahan na tayo. Hahahahaha.
He didn't even ask me directly that he was courting me. What are we doing? Just a game?
Sa level na to laro lang?
"Fine if that's what you want"
Tumayo na siya.
"Wait... I can't find my sanitizer"
Napakamot tuloy siya sa kanyang ulo.
Baka naiwan ko sa isang kong bag. May sariling pouch ang alcohol, sanitizers at wipes ko.
"Let's pay first, sa sasakyan mayroon"
When we got into his car he promptly gave me spray rubbing alcohol. He has to take me back to school and he'll go back to university.
"Baka naiwan ko sa washroom ng Consola" wika ko sa kawalan.
"Just drop me off near the convenience store"
I turned to him and he did the same. Why is he surprised again. Ilang beses ba dapat siyang magulat sa araw na ito?
Hindi naman kasi kailangan na ihatid niya ako sa gate o mas malala sa loob ng school. Anong sasabihin ng iba? Baka ma headline kami kinabukasan senior-high-student-caught-flirting-with-a-college-student.
"Do you have a problem? Masakit ba tiyan mo? Kanina kapa uncomfortable, Liv" now I can see in his eyes that he's worried.
"Wala naman. I just couldn't find my sanitizer" I said shyly and I was shaking my hands.
He sighed after a few minutes and suddenly laughed. He was still holding his stomach.
I feel embarrassed.
I'm ashamed to look at him. So it was good for me to get out of his car.
