Shutter [Jonathan Byers] Stranger Things I

LVI: Courage

cour·age

noun

the ability to do something that frightens one

The feeling of being ripped away from the real world made Emilia sick, but it was the pain in her arm, neck and face that startled her. Searing pain coursed through her like nothing else had before; what was this agony she was sensing? Her hands were immobile for a moment, but she could feel the ground below her. Completely aware of the fact that she had been grabbed by the monster and pulled into the Upside Down, she knew that she was not safe. But the pain, what was that awful sensation? She couldn't pin point it, because she had never felt anything like it before. The attempt to ignore it and move on was futile, and only made her focus on the pain worsen.

She rose to her knees, crawling slightly as she regained her mind. The throbbing pain did not ebb, but she had no choice but to run. The monster was not facing her, but it was so close that she could smell it. It was distracted, but by what, she wondered. Hopefully not Hopper and Joyce. That's when she remembered that there was still a chance that she could get out of this place. She had to get out of this place, no matter what. When she'd asked Jonathan what would happen if they didn't get Will back, he said he'd still have her. What, then, would he do should he lose both of them? She was not one to revel in the limelight, not one to think of herself as a driving force for someone, but she knew what it felt like to lose someone you cared for. Someone you loved.

She ran, she ran through the strange place, unsure of where she was or where she was going. Only one thing drove her to run and ignore the pain on her body, and that was to find Will, to find Hopper, to find Joyce, and to find her way back home. Time was foreign here, she had no idea how long it had been since she had been taken, how long she had been out of it, but she ran until she ended up in an eerie version of Hawkins. A Hawkins that was a nightmare, but it was familiar at least.

The growl of the monster could be heard, but she was not its main focus right then and there. Eyes scanning furiously, hoping not to see the monster, she realized that she was in a strange place -stranger than usual. When she looked around, the walls seemed thickly covered by a mucus-like substance. Her eyes landed on something; someone. It was Will. A stem of some sort was locked onto his mouth. Finding the courage to stand, Emilia walked towards the boy who looked dead. Her heart thumped harder and harder in her chest, but she did not back down, she did not cower.

Will had been in here a week, Emilia had spent a few minutes at a time here and there like a tourist. It was time that she took initiative. Hopper and Joyce were in here, somewhere -she hoped. They would find them both, and Emilia made it her goal to keep Will alive at all costs. Before she reached the young boy, she heard the monsters heavy steps as it sauntered over; half like a man, half like a beast. It drew too close to Will, and Emilia knew then that he was still alive. But it looked like he was being used for something, and Emilia had a terrible feeling that she knew what it was. She'd seen Ridley Scott's "Alien" enough times to know what she was looking at.

"Hey!" She shouted at the monster. It didn't seem to hear her, it continued to walk towards Will. "Hey! You ugly mother-"

It turned and she lost her voice, but not her courage. The attention on her, she would be the prime target, she wouldn't let it take Will. She wouldn't let it do more than it had already done to the Byers family. A deep set part of her mind wondered how Jonathan was reacting right then, and imagined it would not be well. But she was still here, she was still alive. The monster pursued her, and she began to run, as fast as she could but she knew that she could never outrun it. She was not fast enough, the pain on her body slowing her down, and the monster had grabbed her leg before she made it a few yards. She fell to the ground, dust motes floated around her body where it disrupted the world, and she felt her body being dragged back. Back towards where Will was.

She looked at Will, not caring that the monster was in fact dragging her along the ground, and noticed that he looked dead. Her heart stopped and that's when she began to kick, trying to free herself from the beast. The mucus held Will in place like straps on a hospital bed, the kind that held down McMurphy in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest", only if Stephen King had written the book instead. She fought hard, unwilling to let this monster win, unwilling to let it use her like it had clearly used Will. But it was strong, and it's teeth-covered petal-face opened up wide, as if yelling at her to stop fighting. Meaty hands with claws like talons lifted her up, and the mucus on the wall began to strap itself to Emilia. She wiggled and managed to snap through the freshly formed mucus. The monster roared again, then slammed her against the wall; this time, she lost sight of everything.

When Emilia woke, she was alone. At least, the monster was gone and the young boy beside her did not give off any sign of life. She felt sore, not just where her body ached when she woke in this world, but her throat. A nausea wrapped itself around her like a vortex, but she was unable to throw up. Attempting to shift proved futile, but she was able to move her eyes and look around. Part of her wanted to call for Hopper and Joyce, but another part of her was exhausted, too tired to even muster up the energy to shout. Instead, she glanced over at Will, desperate to ensure his survival even if it cost her own.

"Will..." She tried to speak, but something was in her mouth and every part of her ached.

She thought she heard him breathe.

"Will!" She called out louder, but she still could not speak. She knew that whatever was in Will's mouth was also in hers.

Emilia shut her eyes, trying to drown out the pain she felt, trying to fall back asleep now. Will wasn't responding, no one was around, perhaps no one was even coming for her. The twisted feeling inside of her told her everything she needed to know about what had happened when she blacked out, she just knew it. Instead of crying about it, instead of whining about the pain that seemed never-ending on the left side of her face, neck and arm, she simply allowed herself to remain calm. Fluttering in and out of consciousness, Emilia felt moments of bliss where she was senseless. No pain, no vision in which to see Will hanging there looking too much like a wet corpse for her liking, no thoughts running through her mind, no sounds around her.

During one moment of consciousness where she was particularly in pain, she spotted a yellow form in the distance. At first glance she thought it was the monster coming for her, but no, it was not yellow. Unless there was something else that lived in the Upside Down, this was no monster. She recalled how many people who survived near-death experiences claimed they saw a yellow light or tunnel before their death, or before they were brought back. Science explained it as the nerves in the eyes dying, leaving only a small focus left before it was completed gone. Emilia was unable to focus on what she was looking at, and so she presumed and accepted that she was simply dying. It was better than the alternative, really, now that she was a vessel for the monster. 

She felt it stirring inside of her.

She knew that when she died she would not see her mother, she would not wake up in some sort of afterlife. It would all be over, she'd feel no pain, she'd have no thoughts, she wouldn't miss anyone, because she'd be dead. A long time ago she'd accepted that, but she'd never thought she would die so young. Lolling her head forward, she said in her own mind, "I love you, too, mum."

Question of the day, have you ever done something self-sacrificing for another person?