Second Chances

Chapter 6

Carter couldn’t control the surprised look on his face when he saw Casey. Instead of one of her usual glamorous evening ensembles, she had on one of his old blue dress shirts. It hung loosely on her, but somehow it seemed infinitely more sexy than any of the figure-hugging dresses she loved so much. She had on some blue jeans and her feet were bare of shoes or socks. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail high on her head, and her face was completely devoid of the usual layers of makeup she wore. She had Jon over one shoulder and was holding Brooke’s hand with the other.

"There’s your daddy!" Casey crooned to the baby, glancing down at Brooke and pulling her gently by the hand into the room. "Come on, honey, let’s take your cousin Jon to see his daddy and Uncle Jerry, OK?"

Everyone’s attention was drawn to Jerry as he let go of his glass in disbelief and it crashed to the floor, shattering on contact. As soon as Brooke heard the sound of the breaking glass, she let go of Casey’s hand and rushed to her mother, hiding her face in Lois’s jean-clad legs.

"I didn’t do it, Mommy! I’m sowwy the glass got broke!" Brooke sobbed and clung tightly to Lois, and Casey thought her heart would break.

"That’s OK, punkin’, Aunt Casey knows you didn’t break the glass," Lois said, crouching down and trying desperately to calm the crying child. But before she could say another word, Casey came over to the two of them.

"Hey, Brooke, you know what?" Casey used her free hand to rub the little girl’s back soothingly as she crouched down to Brooke’s level, juggling Jon in the other arm. Lois tapped Casey on the shoulder silently and put her hands out, and Casey nodded quickly. Lois scooped the baby out of Casey’s hands and put him on her own shoulder as she straightened up. "Hey there – Brooke Lynn? You know what?"

Brooke hesitated to look at her aunt. She turned to Casey briefly. "What?" Having been brave enough to say that one word, she tried to bury her face in her mother’s legs again.

"*I* think those were just about the *ugliest* glasses I ever saw," Casey confided with a smile. She waited silently until Brooke hiccuped and turned to her again.

"Reawwy?" This time, Brooke dared to keep looking at her Aunt Casey.

"Really." She patted the little girl on the back again. "And I know it wasn’t your fault that the glass got broken." She rose to her feet and turned back to Jerry, who still stood there with his mouth hanging open. "It’s your clumsy daddy’s fault." She walked over to him and tapped his chin with her finger.
"And you should really close your mouth, Jerry. You’ll start to drool all over the carpet."

Casey had been lucky enough to overhear the commotion when Lois supervised Jerry and Charles setting up the crib. She had sneaked a peak around the corner of the doorway and from the way Lois affectionately railed at him, she deduced immediately that the man had to be her husband, Jerry -- Carter’s older brother.

Jerry closed his mouth deliberately and then blinked. "Bloody h…." He stopped himself just in time as Lois cleared her throat loudly. "Well, I’ll say one thing for her, Carter," he murmured, looking in Carter’s direction. "She’s just as cheeky now as she was before."

"I’ll take that as a compliment, Jerry," Casey smiled. Then, before he could utter another word, she leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. "And just because you’re company tonight, I’ll get Charles to clean up the glass."

Jerry shot Carter a bewildered look as Carter gave him an "I-told-you-so" look in return. Casey just watched the both of them with a smile and then returned to Lois as Jon started to whimper. "Why don’t you let me take him back?"

Just as Casey retrieved her son, Robin appeared in the doorway. "Good evening, everyone," she smiled. She came over and patted Jon reassuringly on the back. "Sounds like the newest Jacks isn’t too happy."

Jerry gingerly made his way through the broken glass and came to give Robin a kiss on the cheek. "That’s only because I probably talked too loud and scared the little bugger."

"Lord knows you have that effect on me all the time!" Lois came forward with a smile to give Robin a hug. "How ‘ya doin’, kiddo?"

"Fine, thanks," Robin replied. "I really appreciate you recommending me to Carter and Casey, guys. They’re pretty special people."

Jon let loose with another loud wail. "Well, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I think Jon and I are pretty *hungry* people," Casey said with a smile. "Anyone else want to join us?"

Robin put her hands out to Casey. "Why don’t you let me take him and give him that one last bottle of breast milk? That way, you can have a nice welcome-home dinner with the grown ups."

"That would be great, Robin -- thanks." Casey handed the baby over and Robin was out the door, cuddling him as she went. Casey turned back to Brooke, who was still sniffling softly. "Say there, Brooke -- did your mommy tell you I had a little accident at the hospital and I don’t remember much?" Brooke nodded silently, her big blue eyes the exact replica of her mother’s. "Well, do you think you could show me the way to the dining room for supper? I don’t remember how to get there."

To Carter’s amazement, Brooke put out her hand and took Casey’s. She turned and led the smiling woman out the door of the den as Carter walked over to Jerry and Lois. "What did I tell you?" he said to Jerry once Casey was out of earshot.

"She’s bloody *scary*, that’s what she is," Jerry replied softly. "It’s like she’s ......"

"....reborn," Lois finished for him. She crossed her arms with a satisfied smile. "I been readin’ about these near death-thingies, and they say it happens a lot."

She started to head for the dining room, leaving the two brothers standing there open-mouthed. "But just remember -- children have an uncanny ability to be able to read people. They can tell when someone’s lyin’ to ‘em."

She pointed to where Brooke and Casey had gone. "Now that child was petrified to be with Casey before. And," Lois put her hands up in qualification, "I admit she was hesitant tonight. But don’t ‘cha think it’s kinda strange that she feels so comfy with her Aunt Casey now?" She gave them a pointed look. "Maybe we all should take some lessons from her."

Lois left the room and Jerry turned to Carter. "She’s bloody insufferable when she’s right, ‘ya know."

Carter just shook his head and sighed. "That’s just the problem, Jer. I just DON’T know." They left the study together and headed for the dining room.

Twenty minutes later, Lois had to kick Jerry’s shin again under the table as he stared at Casey. Jerry gave her a dirty look and she smiled at him. "It’s not polite to stare at her, Jerry," she whispered for his ears only.

"But she’s eatin’ like a bloody lumberjack, Lois!"

Jerry watched as Casey scraped the last of her salad onto her fork and smiled contentedly. Carter sat at the head of the table with Casey at the other end. Jerry and Lois sat on one side, with Brooke sitting alone on the other side of the table. Brooke had been served Jello when all the adults were served large Ceasar salads, and she had laughed aloud when Casey tapped her fork on the cubes, making them dance in the bowl.

Casey sat back and watched as a pleasant but quiet woman came to clear the salad plates. But when she returned with the main course and set it before Casey, she frowned and stared at the sallow colors on the plate.
"What’s this?"

"Your favorite, ma’am," the woman - whom Casey assumed was Margorie - replied. "Chicken in honey dijon sauce with blanched new potatoes."

"Well......" Casey swallowed hard as the garlic and sweet smells made her stomach do somersaults. ".....it certainly is ......yellow, isn’t it?"

"Is something wrong, Casey?" Carter look more confused than ever, if that was possible. "You always used to *love* chicken dijon."

"I’m sorry," she said with a sheepish grin. "I guess it’s just the postpartum thing creeping up on me again." She leaned forward to sniff at it delicately, but the odors still made her feel nauseous. Casey was wondering how she would ever be able to get some of the nasty stuff past her lips when Marjorie returned with a plate for Brooke.

"Spaghetti!" Casey’s face glowed as she stared hungrily at Brooke’s plate. She leaned forward and sniffed the heavenly aroma. "That smells SOOOOO amazing."

Carter put his fork down loudly and sat back in his chair, his chin in his hand. Lois wiped her mouth with her napkin to stifle her knowing smile and Jerry just sat open-mouthed, not even trying to hide it.

Brooke looked shyly at her aunt. "We could share.....if you wanna....."

Casey’s eyes widened and she got a look of pure joy on her face. "Would you share with me, really?" She immediately shot up and moved her chair over to Brooke’s side of the table as Lois had to kick Jerry again to remind him to close his mouth. Casey reached for her silverware and water glass, moving them next to Brooke’s. She took her fork and spun it in the left side of the pasta, taking a small amount and tasting it. "Mmmmm......this IS amazing."

"Marjorie makes good pisgetti," Brooke said, twirling her fork in a way identical to Casey. She put some in her mouth and then sighed and closed her eyes as Casey had. "Mazin."

Casey laughed heartily and looked at Carter, stopping when she caught his gaze. He wasn’t exactly giving her a dirty look -- it was more like a combination of total confusion and unadulterated lust. She shrugged it off and then dug her fork back into the pasta as did Brooke.

"You’re wearing them again!" Carter’s voice brought Casey up short. At her confused look, he pointed at her hand. "Your wedding rings. You’re wearing them."

"Uh....yeah." Casey looked from one startled face to the next at the table. "I found them on the vanity table. They are he....mine, aren’t they?"

"Of course they are," Carter replied quickly. "It’s just that....well, you haven’t worn them for a while -- not for the last 6 months, in fact." His eyes spoke of pain and hurtful words and Casey wished she knew how to take that look away.

"Well, I kept tellin’ you, Carter, that was probably because sometimes, your fingers to swell so much they would have to cut the rings off in the hospital." Lois tried to smile and rationalize the whole thing, but Casey knew that her alter ego probably had had an entirely different reason for stopping wearing the rings.

"SOOO......" Jerry’s voice was artificially bright and bouncy. "Have mum and dad seen the new baby yet?"

"Not yet," Carter answered cautiously.
"We just got home today and I didn’t think Casey would feel up to the entire family descending on her right away."

"But they’re his grandparents, Carter! I *want* them to see him!" Jerry dropped his fork loudly on his plate and reached quickly for his glass of water, but Casey ignored him.

"Well....actually, I was thinking that maybe by the end of the week, we might have a little get-together," Carter said tentatively. He folded his napkin and set it next to his plate. "I thought we could have the baby christened and then maybe just a small dinner here afterwards -- if you’re feeling up to it, that is."

"How small?" Casey realized that she was getting in deeper and deeper with no clue to who Casey Jacks really had been. She needed to do more investigating and fast.

"Mostly family, although these things have a tendency to get out of hand pretty quickly." Carter picked up his napkin again and his face grew stormy. "It was a bad idea. Just forget I mentioned it."

"Well, I think it’s a wonderful idea." Casey shifted a little in her chair as she bristled at Carter’s dismissal. "I certainly want Jon to be baptized, and this weekend sounds like as good a time as any." She paused. "Although....I’ll need your help, Lois."

"Oh, no -- honey, don’t you remember? The staff is here to do all the cookin’ and cleanin’ and stuff. All you have to do is hold the baby and look pretty and smile."

"No, that’s not what I mean." Carter narrowed one eye as Casey contradicted Lois. He wasn’t really sure what Casey was going to say next, but he suspected that it might be some scathing remark about his family.
Perhaps the mention of them and a large family function sparked her memory after all. He wasn’t sure if that was a good thing, or not.

"I mean -- I need you to go shopping with me." Casey forked up another mouthful of spaghetti and giggled as she and Brooke shared the same strand momentarily.

"You mean there’s *nothing* in that huge closet of yours that would please you?" Carter shook his head and looked sadly at Jerry. "I told you the old Casey would be back."

Casey glared at him before Jerry could answer. "No -- that’s not it at all. I’m sure that I could find something in the closet that I could wear if I wanted to look like one of the working girls down on Sunset Strip, but I really don’t think that’s how you want me to look for our son’s christening, do you?"

Carter choked on his chicken and had to take a quick drink of water as Lois smiled, sat back, and applauded. "You go, girl – that’s tellin’ him." She reached across and patted Casey’s hand. "I’ll be happy to go shoppin’ with you. Name the day."

"Tomorrow." Casey raised an eyebrow defiantly at Carter. "That’s the reason I’m wearing an old shirt of Carter’s tonight. Other than a few pairs of jeans, there’s not a whole lot of comfortable outfits upstairs for a nursing mother to wear." Her eyes lit up like Christmas bulbs. "And maybe we could do some shopping for Jon, too!" She looked down at Brooke. "And if you want to come along, we’ll get you a pretty dress for the christening, too!"

Brooke nodded enthusiastically while Carter set down his fork again. He gave Jerry a puzzled look, and Jerry leaned over to whisper in his ears. "Hold onto your hats, ladies and gentlemen. You have just entered......The Twilight Zone."

*~*~*~*

Jerry and Lois left shortly after the dinner ended. Robin returned and announced that Jon was sleeping peacefully and she would be turning in early so that she could assist Casey if she was needed during the night. Casey watched as Robin left the den. {Why do you feel so nervous? The man’s your *husband* for goodness’ sake. You made a baby together.} Then, she remembered the pain on his face and the talk of how the other Casey had stopped wearing her wedding rings. {What kind of witch was she, anyway? Didn’t she love Carter at all? Why did she ever marry him?}

As Carter sat and worked at the huge desk, a plan formed in Casey’s mind. "Carter – you’ll probably think this is a silly question…"

"Go ahead." Carter’s voice was flat. {Now it’s coming. She’ll ask a question, and then her memory will come back, and the honeymoon will be over.}

"Well….are there any videotapes of us in the house? Like at our wedding or something?" She fiddled nervously with the huge diamonds on her left hand. "I just thought that maybe they would …..spark a memory or something…..I don’t know…."

{Maybe it’s just as well. The longer this goes on, the more you keep getting your hopes up, man.} Carter struggled to keep his voice calm, even though he felt like he was the captain on the Titanic, urging his men to sail on at full speed towards the icebergs. "That’s probably a great idea, Casey." He rose from the desk and went to a large cabinet. Carter studied the contents for a moment, and then pulled out two plain, black tape boxes. "You might find these helpful. It’s about all we’ve got."

Casey took them from him and turned them to look at the labels. One had a white, flowered label with a flowing script title – "Carter and Casey’s wedding." She smiled wanly at Carter, and then turned the other one over. The plain white label had been marked in several different colors of ink – probably every time some footage was added to the tape – "Casey’s birthday, 1996" "Summer, 1997," "New Year’s Eve, 1998."

"Thanks – these might help a lot." Casey nodded and then looked around the den. "Is there somewhere in here…..?" Then she glanced back at the open file folders on Carter’s desk. "Oh, I’m sorry…..I can just take these upstairs …is there a VCR in my room? I’ll turn the volume down so I don’t wake….."

Carter held up a hand halfway through her apologies. "I’m wiped." He glanced back at the open files on the desk. "None of those contracts were making any sense any more tonight, anyway." He went to another set of doors and opened them, revealing a built-in television/VCR. "You can be comfortable and watch the tapes down here if you want."

As Carter went back to the desk and closed the files, making order, Casey went to the television and studied the knobs. Carter passed behind her on his way to the door. "Will you….uh….need any help getting upstairs later?"

"No, thanks," she smiled, her lips thin. "And I appreciate this, Carter. If I have any problems working the machine, I’ll just find Charles or something."

"Well, good night, then." Carter stood awkwardly at the door. "I’ll leave this open a crack – in case you need someone."

Casey nodded as she found the remote and moved away from the set. "Good night." She was so absorbed as the tape started that she never noticed Carter leaving the room. She had chosen to watch the wedding tape first. At first, she sat on the edge of a leather armchair about ten feet from the TV, but after she was sure Carter had gone upstairs, she turned out most of the lights in the room and moved to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of the TV.

Casey could tell immediately that this was a professional wedding video. She watched as it panned the very house where she was sitting – apparently they had chosen to have the ceremony at home. She caught her breath when the camera showed Carter and Jerry, laughing and hugging. She had the sound turned down since she didn’t want to wake Carter or the baby, but she could still hear enough to know that Jerry was teasing Carter about "biting the dust" and "the loss of another good man."

Any questions she had had about how Carter would look in formal wear were quickly put to rest – he was simply gorgeous. There was no other word to describe it. The tuxedo had a dove-gray jacket and he wore a white ruffled shirt with the traditional black tuxedo trousers. Jerry had on a tux with a Columbia blue shirt, gray jacket, and the same black trousers. Casey bit her lip as she watched Carter run his fingers through his unruly blonde hair. {One of his nervous habits. I wonder if she…….I have any of those.}

The shot abruptly shifted to a candlelit living room with guests sitting on white wicker folding chairs. Soft organ music began to play as Casey recognized Lois walking down the aisle. She was wearing a simple Columbia blue tea length shift with a matching lace overlay, although the lace was studded randomly with iridescent sequins and pearls. Lois smiled for the camera, but somehow Casey got the impression that her heart wasn’t in her duties as matron of honor. She met Jerry and then they turned back with Carter to wait for Casey to appear.

Casey leaned forward anxiously as the bride appeared on the screen. The first thing that caught her eye was the amount of makeup that Casey Jacks had worn. Of course, she had found all the ingredients on the vanity table, but she hadn’t realized that they had been applied with such a heavy hand. {Her face almost looks like it’s going to crack if she changes her expression – like cheap paint that dries brittle to the touch.}

Casey soon-to-be-Jacks walked down the aisle to meet Carter alone. Her dress was the same dove-gray color as the men’s formal jackets. It was simple – slipper satin, a rounded neckline and full skirt with crinoline. There really weren’t any sleeves – a bias-cut band of satin that circled just above her breasts went around her upper arms just below the shoulders. It gave the effect that the dress was strapless.

When she met Carter at the front of the room, the camera swung around to capture the ceremony for posterity. Casey fast-forwarded through most of it. When she saw the exchange of rings, she hit the "play" button again, and rewound a little so that she could hear the way "she" spoke her vows. Casey swallowed hard when she heard "herself" speak. The words were breathy and soft, almost reminiscent of Marilyn Monroe. But Casey frowned in surprise as she listened to the words "she" spoke. The emotion in her voice almost seemed genuine.

As the camera shifted to Carter and he began his vows, Casey caught her breath again. The look in his eyes was so intense she could feel the heat, even just from videotape. {He loved her. He *really* loved her.} He repeated the phrases after the minister, but somehow, even the ordinary traditional words like "honor" and "cherish" seemed like they came from somewhere deep in his soul. The camera shifted once to the bride, and Casey was surprised to see just the hint of the same look in "her" eyes. {Maybe she loved him, too. Not as much as he loved her, but a little – at least.}

Casey fast-forwarded through the rest of the ceremony and the receiving line. She stopped the tape again when it showed the cake-cutting ceremony. As the bride fed Carter some of the white, sticky confection, Casey watched him suck her fingers into his mouth. The cameraman had unwittingly captured a sensual, X-rated moment on tape. She could even see his tongue working, licking the last bit of frosting and swirling around the end of her delicate fingers. There was applause and Carter leaned down to whisper something in his bride’s ear, causing her to blush profusely. Casey couldn’t hear what he had said, but she also noticed him run the tip of his tongue just inside the outer shell of her ear as he finished speaking.

{Whew! Is it hot in here or what?} Casey looked around the darkened room as she fanned herself briskly with her hands. {Wow – he is some kinda sensual guy. Could you imagine if he ever started acting romantic with you? If he ever ……} Casey’s attention was drawn back to the tape as Carter leaned down to feed his bride some cake. He behaved himself, not smearing it all over her face, but then Casey saw him slip his fingers in her mouth in return.
As she watched "herself" suck them with just as sexy and playful of a response, Casey felt herself breathing faster. Carter broke off the loveplay to lean down and kiss "her," and Casey saw his tongue lick the frosting off her lips before it sank deeply into her mouth.

Casey pressed the "stop" button. {Enough of that. Between the sexy stuff going on between them and your postpartum hormones, you’ll be too turned on to sleep if you keep watching this!} She took the other tape out of the plastic container and popped it in the VCR, returning to her seat on the floor.
The first scene showed Carter leading a blind-folded Casey around a path in the garden. They were laughing and teasing back and forth – this was obviously home video, probably with Charles as cameraman, she guessed. Carter looked back over his shoulder one last time – probably to make sure the entire scene was being caught on tape – and then told Casey that she could remove her blind-fold. Once she did, there was a loud squeal and she ran towards something off the screen. The shot widened to show her opening the door of an expensive-looking red convertible that had a huge red bow on the engine. Carter sauntered casually over to the side of the car, and as the camera zoomed in, it caught him leaning down to give "her" another sensual French kiss. Casey squinted and leaned forward to get a better look, but it appeared that "she" was returning the kiss with equal ardor.

The scene abruptly went black and the next shot showed what looked like a raucous party at the side of their swimming pool. Carter was tending bar, and Casey had to remind herself to breathe at the sight of him shirtless. The man had the most beautiful chest she had ever seen. As she continued to enjoy the view, she saw Carter’s face suddenly turn dour. A few seconds later, she saw the reason.

Casey Jacks, clad in a scandalously skimpy red bikini, appeared on the screen. She was waving and laughing raucously. {She’s drunk as a skunk.} Carter murmured something to her that the camera didn’t pick up, but "she" just turned to him, picked up a drink, and tossed the liquid in his face.

Casey gasped aloud as the contents of the cocktail hit Carter in the face. "Smack her!" she whispered to the TV, glancing around with a guilty look to make sure nobody else had heard her.
But to her surprise, Carter just took a cocktail napkin and wiped his face.
"She" continued to laugh, and Casey realized that "her" laugh was getting on *her* nerves! The camera painfully continued to roll and Casey watched in horror as "she" went to one of the other men at poolside and sat in his lap gleefully. "She" caressed his bronzed chest and nuzzled the side of his neck in a far-more-than-friendly manner.

Casey shook her head. {So this is what she turned into. Why? She seemed to love him at first.} The next scene on the tape showed a similar New Year’s Eve party. The situation was almost identical to the pool party, except that everyone was wearing formal clothes instead of swimsuits. "She" played up to every man in the room except Carter, who stood watching her from a corner – alone. At midnight, Casey watched in agony as "she" gave scintillating kisses and longer-than-normal hugs to several of their male guests.

Casey pressed the "stop" button and hung her head. {You never told me this, God. You must really have a lot of confidence in me – to expect me to fight this kind of reputation.} She exhaled loudly, the events of the day suddenly taking their toll on her.
Putting the wedding tape back in its cover, Casey went to the VCR, ejected the other tape, put it in its cover, and then closed the cabinet doors. Taking the tapes with her, she turned out the lights in the den, and then slowly made her way through the silent house up the stairs to her room.

*~*~*~*

"No! Don’t do it, Momma!"
Casey could feel the muscles in her arms tense. She tugged at the steering wheel with all her might, but she wasn’t strong enough to keep the car from crashing through the barrier. She felt the same sensation of being airborne – almost like flying. Then, there was the terrible jolt of the impact.

But this time, Casey wasn’t knocked unconscious. She felt the icy water streaming into the car, flooding up under her legs. She saw the peaceful look on her mother’s face, but it wasn’t mirrored on her own. Before she could even blink, she felt the water closing around her face, filling her nostrils, stinging with cold needles as it inundated every opening of her body.

She kept trying to scream but she just gulped more water. This hadn’t happened the first time! It didn’t hurt this much the first time! Why couldn’t she just get out one more good scream? "NOOOOO!!!"

Casey felt strong hands at her shoulders, shaking her gently. "Casey, wake up!"

Casey fought the hands, pushing away with all her might. She still couldn’t breathe. Maybe if she could just swim to the surface, she would be able to breathe again. She flailed her hands in the air, but then when they connected with hard, bare flesh, her eyes shot open.

Anguished crystal blue eyes looked back into hers in the darkened bedroom. Carter was sitting next to her on the bed, trying desperately to pull her to consciousness. "Casey! Are you alright?"

To be continued…..