Second Chances

Chapter 10

"Miguel?" Casey whispered, freezing in place. "Let me go!!"

"Not until we get re-acquainted, cara," Miguel hissed. He lowered his face to nuzzle her neck, and Casey pushed at his arms with all her strength. "Go get the Martinique, and then I’ll take you away from here with me tonight. We’ll pawn it when we get to Brazil."

Casey pulled away from him, frowning. "The Martinique? I don’t know that the h*ll you’re talking about!"

Miguel’s grip on her upper arms became painful. "Stop playing games with me, Casey," he growled. "We’re talking about millions of dollars here."

Casey’s head began to swim as she stared into Miguel’s cold, glittering eyes. Obviously there was more going on than just a simple affair between Casey Jacks and her lover. As she began to breathe hard, Casey’s knees grew weak. "I really.......I don’t feel well."

As Casey began to wilt towards the floor in his arms, Miguel finally realized she was telling the truth. He half-carried her towards a more well-lit area of the patio. "You do look pale, novia." Miguel guided her so that she could sit on a low stone wall. "I apologize for my thoughtlessness earlier. You have been through an ordeal, giving birth to your son."

Casey laughed grimly. "More than just an ordeal." She raised her eyes to Miguel’s. "Did Carly tell you that my heart stopped during the delivery? That I died for almost half a minute?"

Miguel went to one knee at Casey’s feet. "She told us, mi amada. My own heart almost stopped in sympathy for yours."

{EEEEWWWWW! What an oily slimeball! How could someone like Casey Jacks fall for anyone as contrived as this jerk?}

As Miguel took Casey’s hand and kissed the back of it, she had to suppress the urge to throw up in his lap. "Again, I apologize for pushing you, Casey. I should have realized that you would still be in a weakened state from your travails."

"Darn tootin’, buster," Casey muttered. She put the flat of her hand to her forehead. "In fact, I don’t see how she......I ever thought that I could run away with you right after the delivery." At Miguel’s puzzled look, she went on. "I mean, Jon is so tiny and fragile at this age. He would never be able to travel all that way......"

Miguel shook his head and smiled. "No, no, amada! Have you forgotten?" Casey frowned and shrugged and Miguel grabbed her hand again, holding it in both of his. "The baby was never to come with us. We planned to leave him here with his father so that it would be just the two of us.......the way we wanted it to be from the beginning."

Casey eyes grew large and tears filled them. "She......we didn’t......we weren’t......" She put her fingers to her lips, but then took a deep breath and wiped her eyes, shaking her head. She could hear the music and laughter coming from the tent, but at that moment, Casey felt like she was in a surreal nightmare -- even more than she did in the crystal garden after her car left the bridge in Port Charles.

"Do you want me to get you something to drink? Some champagne, perhaps, to revive you?" Miguel gestured towards the dining room as he rose to his feet.

Casey stopped him, grabbing his arm. "No, what I want you to do right now is to listen to me VERY CAREFULLY." Miguel looked surprised, but nodded. "What Carly told everyone is true. My heart stopped during the baby’s delivery. The doctors think that the lack of oxygen getting to my brain is causing me to have amnesia."

Miguel gave her an optimistic smile. "But you remembered me, Casey! And you will remember all of our plans, and then we can go ahead with them very soon, no?"

{NO WAY, JOSE!!} "The doctors can’t be sure when I’ll regain my memories. And I *didn’t* remember you. I just figured it had to be you from the way Carly described you and the way you were talking to me."

Miguel rose to his feet and began pacing around the patio. Finally he turned to her, his finger raised to make a point. "But this is not necessarily bad, Casey! While you regain your memories, we can have all the pleasure of getting to know each other again!"

{Not in this lifetime, Ace.} "Look, Miguel, I’m going to try to say this one more time." She took a deep breath, glancing upwards towards heaven and silently asking for some "help." "Since I "died" and came back, I’ve changed. I’ve got all these maternal feelings for Jon, and I like my life just the way it is." Miguel frowned. "I don’t know how to say this without hurting your feelings."

He raised an eyebrow. "But?"

Casey found herself hoping against hope that he would take the news calmly. "Whatever we had is over, Miguel. I don’t want to run away with you."

Miguel inhaled sharply as though someone had stabbed him. {This guy is such a turkey! I’ve seen better acting in summer stock!} "You have found someone else? Some doctor in the hospital where you had the baby?"

"No, Miguel!" Casey raised a fist to her forehead in frustration. But when she looked back at him, she could see that his own anger and frustration were starting to build. "OK. There’s no way to say this but to be blunt." She looked him dead in the eye. "I don’t love you, Miguel. I don’t *want* you. It’s true I don’t remember you, but the fact is -- I don’t *want* to remember you." She leaned forward, even though she saw the fury gathering on his face. "I’m married to Carter, and I want it to stay that way. I love him, and that will never change."

"CARTER? You love CARTER?" Miguel’s derisive exclamation echoed on the patio. "And when did you discover this ....... this new *passion* for your husband?" Miguel sneered the word so sharply that it made Casey cringe.

"Miguel, please try to understand......." Casey rose to her feet as Miguel began to pace around the patio. But then, before she could say another word, he turned back to her. His face was contorted with anger and he strode towards her.

"Oh, I understand all right!" he hissed. "I understand more than you probably think I do!" He grabbed Casey by the forearms. "You think you’re so smart, but I’m onto your game!"

"Game?" Casey frowned and looked down at his fingers as they gripped her.

"You think you’re so clever, don’t you, novia?" He laughed, and it began to scare Casey. She tried to look over her shoulder towards the tent, but Miguel jerked her body so that she was forced to stare into his face. "You faked this entire amnesia thing just so that you and CARTER can have the Martinique for yourselves!"

"Miguel, now just calm down...." Casey tried to pull away from Miguel, but he just held her that much tighter.

"Calm down? CALM DOWN?" Miguel jerked her against his body and leered at her, his breath fanning her hair. "When did you tell Carter of our plans? From the start, or just after you insisted on hiding the Martinique for safe keeping?"

"Miguel," Casey pleaded, "for the last time, I don’t know what this Martinique thing is that you keep talking about. Now please just let me go and I won’t tell Carter......"

"Oh, your precious Carter," Miguel sneered again. "Do you really think he is such a *big* man, Casey? Do you think that because he has more money or cars or houses than I do that he can make you feel more pleasure?" Miguel lowered his face to her neck again as Casey felt the nausea building. "You should know by now that I won’t share you with anyone, Casey."

Casey was trembling, her voice hushed. "What do you mean?"

"I told Max to stay away from you, but no -- he insisted on following you around the gym." To Casey’s relief, Miguel finally released his grip on her arms. "Max told me that you were just his friend, but I could see the lust in his eyes whenever he looked at you."
Miguel looked at her with malice written clearly on his face, but also a malevolent, twisted half-smile. "The doctors say he will go home from the hospital next week. With therapy, he may even walk again."

Casey gasped aloud. "Miguel -- you wouldn’t......" She began backing up, moving away from him towards the pathway leading towards the tent.

"No, I wouldn’t, Casey. I allowed Max to live, but if you insist on this nonsense of reconciling with Carter….." Miguel’s chest was heaving as he pointed a shaky finger at Casey. "I will kill him before I ever let him have you."

"And I’ll kill *you* if you ever show up on my property again." Casey cried out in sheer relief at the sound of Carter’s voice. As he spoke the words, Carter, Jerry, and two private security policemen walked into the lighted area of the patio. "What are you doing here, Morez?"

Casey ran to Carter, throwing her arms around him and hugging him so tightly that she threw him off balance slightly. She buried her head against his chest but then looked up at him with tears in her eyes when she didn’t feel his arms go around her in return. "Carter? You don’t......." Her lip began to tremble. "Oh, my God! You don’t think that *I* invited him....."

"Mr. Morez crashed the party, Casey." Jerry’s words were curt and Casey sighed in relief as she finally felt Carter’s arms enfold her. "Security just informed Carter that a rookie guard accidentally let him in."

"A rookie who is no longer employed by our security firm," Carter added. "So don’t get any bright ideas about using him in the future, Morez." He nodded briskly and the two policemen walked over to stand on either side of Miguel. "Now, I believe these two gentlemen will be happy to show you to the front gate."

Miguel walked past Casey and Carter with an ugly smile. "I’ll see her whenever I want, Carter. She doesn’t love you, despite what she says. It’s just another game." He leaned towards them and one of the security guards caught him by the arm. "She enjoys games, don’t you remember, Carter?" He gave Casey a lewd glare. "Which fantasy did you ask *him* to act out, amada? The duchess and the highwayman or the pirate and......."

Miguel never got a chance to finish as Carter pulled away from Casey, drawing his right arm back to punch Miguel. Jerry caught him just in time as the two security guards wrestled Miguel towards the edge of the patio. "Carter! Don’t give him the satisfaction!" Jerry held Carter firm as Miguel yanked his arm free and straightened his coat. He laughed bitterly and then turned, walking from the patio with a haughty stride.

"He was only trying to bait you, Carter," Jerry muttered, finally letting Carter’s arm go. "Didn’t you hear what Casey told him?" Jerry put his hand on Carter’s shoulder, squeezing it affectionately. "She said she loved you, man. She said she wanted to stay with you."

Carter took a long, deep breath, and then nodded quickly at Jerry. But when he looked towards Casey, he broke away from his brother and rushed towards her. "Casey? Are you OK?"

Casey had wrapped her arms around her waist and tears were running freely down her cheeks. As Carter came to her, her knees gave way and she collapsed into his arms. "Carter......you have to believe me....." Casey’s words came out on shaky sobs. "......I didn’t invite him......I told him to leave......"

Carter couldn’t help himself as he took Casey into his arms and rocked her like a baby. He stroked her hair, pulling her to his chest. "I know, love. I heard you."

Casey put her hands against his chest, pushing him away angrily. "But do you *believe* me, Carter? You can’t think......I didn’t want....." She pulled from his embrace, placing her hands flat on his chest in entreaty. "He wouldn’t let me go, Carter! He kept trying to kiss me and ...... I was so scared......I thought you wouldn’t come......"

Carter’s eyes widened as Lois came up behind Jerry. {She’s really frightened. I’ve never seen her like this before. The other times I found her with Morez, she was anxious to flaunt him in my face.} He pulled Casey back into his arms and held her tightly. "I know, love. I know he crashed the party." He pulled away from her a little as her sobs faded to hiccups. "I believe you, Casey."

Casey could have sung hosannas for the look she saw as she stared into his eyes. The crystal blue had turned to blue flame in the twilight and as Carter stroked her hair gently, Casey leaned into his caress. Carter saw her lower lip still trembling and he traced it gently with his thumb. "I would never let him hurt you, Casey." {Not when I love you so much.} Carter had to stop himself before he said something he would regret later.

Lois watched the fireworks building between the two but then the band in the tent struck up again. She moved towards them, taking Casey’s arm. "Carter…..why don’t I take Casey upstairs so she can fix her makeup?"

Casey’s fingers trembled as she gripped Lois’s arm. "And Jon! Oh my God, Jon!" Miguel’s reminder of "their" plan to leave the baby with Carter and never see him again sent shivers down her spine. "I want to check on my baby!"

"OK, OK, honey…..we’ll check on Jon, too." Lois put her arm around Casey and the two women slowly walked towards the French doors of the dining room. Lois turned back towards Jerry and Carter once as they made their way inside, sending Jerry a signal he couldn’t ignore.

As Jerry stood with Carter and he saw Lois’s eyes, he grimaced. Once the women were inside the house, he groaned out loud. "Bloody h*ll, I hate that look."

"What look?" Carter released a long sigh, running one hand through his hair as he propped the other on his hip.

Jerry pointed towards where his wife had disappeared with Casey. "The look -- you know?" Carter shook his head and Jerry snorted in disbelief. "You didn’t see that look Lois just gave me?"

"I’m sorry, Jer, but I’ve been a little pre-occupied. Did she give you some kind of special look?"

Jerry turned Carter back towards the tent and shook his head. "Of course she did. It’s the look that means that I’m supposed to try to talk some sense into you, or else I won’t be seein’ my wife naked again until they’re makin’ snowmen in h*ll!"

Carter smirked. "So -- I’m waiting. Talk some sense into me about what?"

"Casey." Carter and Jerry had arrived back at the tent where a bar had been set up serving after-dinner brandies. As Jerry held up two fingers to the bartender, he leaned one elbow on the bar. "Lois thinks she’s changed."

Carter accepted a snifter of brandy from the bartender and laughed. "Well, that’s pretty obvious, Jer. Even *I* figured that one out."

"No, I mean she’s *permanently* changed, Carter." Jerry nodded his head towards a quiet corner of the tent and the two men moved in that direction. "Lois has been reading a lot about people who have these death experiences, and she thinks that Casey got a pretty strong wake-up call. Look at the way she is with the baby."

Carter took a sip of brandy. "I’ve got to admit -- I never thought I would live to see the day Casey Jacks would want to go check on her son before she re-did her mascara."

Jerry nodded. "And she says you should have seen her on the shopping trip. Brooke positively adores her, and -- get this," Jerry muttered, leaning towards Carter. "Casey even asked *Mum’s* opinion on the dress for the christening. According to Lois, Casey picked out the same dress but in a different color. Mum advised her to pick that pink one she’s wearin’."

Carter swallowed his brandy quickly, snorting at Jerry’s comment. "Probably because Casey had chosen it in flaming red?"

"No!" Jerry put his hand on Carter’s arm. "Lois says Casey picked this washed out white thing, and Mum suggested she should get something with a little more color." Jerry snorted and swirled his brandy. "I think the last time Casey ever asked *or* took Mum’s advice about a dress was when they had that tropical heat wave in Anchorage." Carter shook his head in amazement and Jerry leaned closer. "And you heard what she told Morez right before we walked up, Carter. She sounded sincere. And you and I both know that before this, "sincere" and "Casey Jacks" weren’t words you generally used in the same sentence."

"I just don’t know, Jer," Carter sighed. "I want to trust her. I really do. It would be so nice to have things back the way they were in the beginning."

"Even *better* than they were in the beginning, if you ask me," Jerry muttered. Just then, Lois and Casey re-appeared at the entrance of the tent. Casey had repaired her make-up and hair and Carter felt like steel bands surrounded his chest when he looked at her. "She *does* look like she’s changed, Carter," Jerry encouraged. "Give her a chance."

Carter gave Jerry a sideways glance and then nodded quickly. He walked briskly towards his wife and sister-in-law, smiling warmly at Casey as he did.

{Oh...my...God.....he believes me! He’s smiling at me.....he.....he....} Carter clasped his hands behind him as he reached the women. "I’ve got a bone to pick with you, Mrs. Jacks."

{Oops! Was I wrong? But he’s smiling....} "What’s that?" Casey whispered.

"You haven’t danced with me yet tonight." He extended his hand towards Casey, still smiling, his hair falling across his forehead with boyish charm.

Casey felt like she was back in junior high at her first boy/girl mixer and Tommy Schnatmeyer had just asked her to slow dance. "Do I like to dance?" she murmured with a coy smile.

Carter took a deep breath. "I’m not sure what Casey Jacks would have liked, but it’s *you* I’m asking to dance," he replied, causing her to catch her breath.

"Then *I* accept," Casey replied, placing her hand in his. As Carter folded her arm in his and led her to the dance floor, many of the guests stopped dancing and smiled. It had been a long time since they saw this couple so happy.

As Carter twirled her under his arm, the orchestra swung into a mellow tune, the trumpets backing up the smoky voice of the female singer.

Love is lovelier the second time around.
Just as wonderful with both feet on the ground.
It’s that second time you hear your love song sung,
Makes you think, perhaps, that love, like youth,
is wasted on the young.

Carter pulled Casey closer into his arms and she sighed in contentment. Sonny had never liked to dance. He was able to stand and sway to a slow song occasionally, but he never moved much around the dance floor. {Oh, my gosh! That’s the first time I’ve thought of Sonny......I haven’t even wondered......} Casey chewed her lower lip and looked up into the eyes of her husband -- the man she knew she was falling in love with. {But this time, it’s just like momma said -- it’s really *love*.}

Love’s more comfortable the second time you fall.
Like a friendly home, the second time you call.
Who can say what brought us to this miracle we’ve found?
There are those who’ll bet
Love comes once, and yet,
I’m oh so glad we met the second time around.

Carter effortlessly moved Casey around the small dance floor. It felt so good to hold her in his arms. He could feel the slight bubble where her tummy still hadn’t gone back to her pre-pregnant shape. As she turned her head to lay it against his chest, Casey’s hair swept across his hand. How could it feel so much softer than he remembered?

When the music ended, Carter was tempted to hold Casey there and continue dancing until the orchestra begged to go home. But some of their guests had already begun to leave, and so Carter and Casey were forced to resume their roles as host and hostess. About an hour later, the last guest had gone home and the security guards sealed the front gate for the night.

Casey was about to climb the stairs for the last time that evening when she heard Carter’s voice behind her. "Need a ride?" She turned around to find him with his arms outstretched, half a twinkle in his eye.

Casey lifted her arms and returned the smile. "Well, my momma always did say something about not looking gift horses in the mouth....."

"A horse!" Carter cried in mock indignation. He swept her into his arms. "So now you’re comparing me to a horse, Mrs. Jacks?"

He took the stairs at a run, causing Casey to giggle in his arms. "Well at least I didn’t say which *end* of the horse, Mr. Jacks!"

They were both still laughing when Carter arrived at the doorway to Casey’s room. He still held her in his arms, turning slightly so that the soft glow from the hallway night light caused her hair to shimmer like dark velvet. Casey trailed a finger down the side of his cheek. "I’m still not used to all of this, you know. I feel like I should thank you for such a beautiful day."

"I’m the one who should thank you, on this of all days -- for giving me such a beautiful son." Carter gently set Casey down but her arms were still wrapped around his neck. Eyes glittered in the dim light with the dawn of passion. As their lips moved closer, the stillness in the hallway was broken by a piercing wail.

Casey shook her head wryly. "I think your beautiful son has lousy timing, Carter." She shifted her shoulders, pointing towards her door. "He’s probably hungry -- I should get inside to him."

Carter nodded and stepped back, the spell broken. "You should. And you should get your rest. It’s been a long day for the both of you."

Casey nodded as the door opened and Robin appeared holding Jon. "I’m sorry, but somebody is looking for his mommy." She smiled at Carter. "I thought he might be worn out after all the excitement of today, but apparently nothing short of a raging bull elephant can keep a Jacks from his food!"

Casey had immediately taken the crying baby from Robin. "There’s my precious angel! Are you hungry, sweetie?" As Casey disappeared into her room, Carter’s eyes followed her hungrily.

"Carter? Did you want to come in for the feeding? I’m sure Casey won’t mind....." Robin gestured towards the darkened bedroom and opened the door wider.

"No, that’s OK." Carter held up his hands, backing away from the door. "Casey’s tired and I’m pretty wiped, myself." He began walking towards his bedroom. "Please tell Casey that I said good night, OK, Robin?"

Robin gave Carter a thumbs-up as Jon wailed even louder. She closed the door behind her and Carter gave a sigh, ruffling his hair with his fingers. He plunged his hands deep into his trouser pockets and then went to his own room, shutting the door behind him quietly.

*~*~*~*

Jon nursed eagerly but fell asleep immediately after Casey burped him. After he had been tucked safely back into his crib and Robin said goodnight, Casey found herself wandering around the huge bedroom. She was too keyed up from the evening’s activities to even lay her head on the pillow.

As she stood by the window and gazed down on the same patio where Miguel had confronted her, Casey couldn’t help but wonder why "she" had been attracted to him in the first place. {What went wrong with their marriage? And why would any woman in her right mind ever want to cheat on a handsome, devoted husband like Carter?}

An idea occurred to Casey and after she made sure that Jon was sleeping soundly, she quickly changed out of her good suit and into a soft cotton nightshirt. After making sure that nobody was in the hallway, Casey crept downstairs to the study. She found the videotapes again and opened the doors to the built-in television. Keeping the lights in the room off, she put the tape of "their" wedding in the VCR and pressed the "play" button.

Casey scooted back and dropped to the floor, watching it from the same position she had the other night. But this time, she paid much more attention to the little details. Like how Carter had constantly been touching "her" in one way or another. Casey noticed that no matter what was happening in the ceremony, Carter’s eyes were riveted to "her." The warmth in them came through, even on a three-year-old videotape.

As the ceremony ended and the scenes at the reception began, Casey felt the tears gathering in her eyes. {Now *that’s* what love looks like. He *really* loved her.} Casey chewed on her lower lip and a small hiccup escaped her. She looked around, afraid someone would have heard, but the room was silent except for the sounds coming from the TV screen. {*That’s* what momma meant about love -- wanting a man to love me the way I deserve to be loved. Sonny never looked at me like that.}

As the tape played on, the tears only ran faster down Casey’s cheeks. {She was SO lucky and she probably never realized it. I would give *anything* for Carter to love *me* like that -- not Casey Jacks, but the REAL me -- Casey Barrett.} She wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand and continued to watch as true love -- and now she knew it was – was captured forever through the magic of videotape.

*~*~*~*

Even though he was exhausted from the day’s festivities, Carter still found himself wide awake. He pushed the covers aside, staring at the clock as he swung his legs out of bed. {1:30 AM. I wonder if Casey’s asleep.....} He sighed and rose from the bed, grabbing his robe on his way to the bedroom door.

{Don’t go there, Carter. You let yourself get too wrapped up in her spell tonight. She did it to you three years ago, and you’re letting it happen again.} Carter sighed and opened his bedroom door, letting himself into the quiet hallway. {I’ll just sneak down to the den and get myself a brandy. That’ll relax me enough to sleep.}

Carter tiptoed down the hallway, pausing only briefly at Casey’s bedroom. He put an ear to her door, but everything inside was silent so he went on down the stairs towards the study. He was just about to go inside the study and flip on the light when he realized somebody was already inside.

No lights were on, but there was a flickering light visible as Carter pushed the door to the study open just a crack. As he peeked inside, Carter had to stifle the gasp that almost escaped his lips. Casey was sitting in the dark on the floor, cross-legged in a floral print nightshirt. She was staring intently at the television, and Carter had to squint until he recognized what she was watching.

It was the videotape of their wedding. Carter could hear himself repeating the vows after the minister, and then he heard Casey’s voice. {God .... I never realized it.......even her *voice* has changed!} He was so busy listening to the vows that sealed their marriage that it was a few minutes before he noticed Casey again.

She was crying. She sniffled softly, but then something seemed to really hit her hard and she sobbed aloud. What would make her cry like that?

{It’s obvious, you idiot. She remembers. Seeing Miguel tonight caused it all to come back.} Carter shook his head grimly. {That’s why she’s crying. She remembered how much she loves Miguel and the thought of being tied to me for life makes her that sad.}

Carter was about to go back to his room when he stopped and frowned. {But if being married to me makes her sad, why would she be watching the video of the wedding in the first place? Wouldn’t that only make her sadder? Wouldn’t she want to *avoid* it -- to trash the tape so she wouldn’t have to ever watch it again?} He crept back towards the door and looked in at her. Carter heard himself toasting his new bride on the tape, and as he watched, he thought he heard Casey muttering.

{No.....what did she just say? She couldn’t have......but it sounded like she said, "why can’t you just love *me*?"} As Carter stood in the darkened hallway, he put his fists to his eyes, rubbing hard. {And if Miguel caused her to remember and hate me again, why did she flirt with me in the hallway tonight? She acted like she wanted me to kiss her.....}

Carter began to pace circles in the hallway, hoping that in some way he could clear the confusion in his mind. He kept hearing Casey’s words in his mind – her sincere-sounding declaration to Miguel that she was married to Carter, she loved him, and she wanted it to stay that way. He kept feeling her trembling body in his arms after Miguel had been taken away, and how she had seemed hysterical when she thought he didn’t believe that Miguel crashed the party. He kept seeing her lips, lush and inviting in the moonlit hallway, inching closer and closer to his. Yet, he kept hearing her sob as she watched the video – a video that also reminded him just how different her voice sounded now than it did then.

Carter’s head shot up as he heard the TV switch off and the sound of the tape ejecting. He knew he wouldn’t be sleeping much, so instead of going back upstairs, he headed in the other direction down the hallway.

*~*~*~*

Thirty minutes later, Casey was about to crawl into her bed when she decided to take one last look out the window. She frowned as she pulled back the curtains. But sure enough -- in the quiet moonlight, Casey saw her husband, doing frantic laps up and down the pool. She watched him for about ten minutes, and then he finally pulled himself out of the water, sitting on the side to catch his breath. Casey watched as he turned to look back up towards her window, and then stared back at the pool again. She saw him take a deep breath, and then he jumped back in the water, starting a new series of laps.

It was very late that night before either Mr. or Mrs. Jacks got any sleep at all.


To be continued...