Second Chances

Chapter 25

"What did you just say?" Carter pulled away from Casey, his face pale and grim in the moonlight. When he pulled his arms back to break his loose embrace, a shiver went down Casey's spine.

She tried to sound nonchalant and logical. "I said that I think we should consider dropping the charges against Miguel."

"Drop the charges?" Carter's eyebrows rose in disbelief and he shook his head. "Do you mean let him make some kind of plea bargain? Let him get by on a lesser charge – some kind of deal?"

Casey took a shaky breath and pushed the hair back out of her eyes. "No – I mean drop the charges completely. Tell the police to let him go and forget that this ever happened."

Carter snorted again and rose from the bed, walking around the bedroom with his hands on his hips. "I can't believe you're actually suggesting this nonsense, Casey!!" He stopped by the doors to the patio. "The man broke into our home, kidnapped you, and almost killed me!! And you're suggesting that we should just......forget about it? Pretend it never happened?"

Casey shifted position and crossed one leg beneath her. "Carter, I know it would be difficult......"

"Difficult? DIFFICULT??!!" Carter ran his fingers through his hair and stood rigidly in place. "Casey, I wasn't sure if the man had blinded me!! Do you know how I felt when I woke up in bed and found you gone? When I saw you two on the beach and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to stop him in time, and that I'd lose you forever? And you want me to just forget that?"

Casey rose and went towards Carter, her hands outstretched. "But Carter, don't you see? If we press charges, there'll be a trial and we'll probably both have to testify. We'll just have to re-live all that again – all that horror." She reached towards Carter but he pulled away from her. "It'll be like having to go through it all again – having to suffer through all the pain all over."

Carter raised an eyebrow at her and Casey felt the chill come from his body. "That's not it at all, is it?" He circled wide around her and went back towards the bed. "You're not worried about re-living the pain at a trial. You're not worried about me at all." Casey shook her head as tears started to gather in her eyes. But when she went towards Carter, he pulled away from her. "You're worried about him." His voice was flat and emotionless. "You remember him. You still love the b*stard."

"NO, CARTER!" Tears were running down Casey' face in earnest. "It's not that!"

"Then what is it, Casey?" he whispered. The anguish in his voice made Casey want to take him in her arms, but he was too hurt for that. "Why would you care about a miserable excuse for a human being like that unless it all came back to you? Unless you remembered that you loved him?"

Casey's mind whirled with the possibilities of explanations. {You saw what happened when you didn't tell Miguel the truth right away. This is your perfect chance. You should just tell him. Explain it to him, the same way you explained it to Miguel. Maybe he won't think you're crazy......} But the more Casey thought about it in that split second, the more firmly she believed that Carter wasn't ready for the REAL truth yet. {You weren't that close to Miguel. He could accept the truth because you hadn't been living with him every day for over two months – passing up chances to tell him the truth – lying to him about what really happened that day, but telling him at the same time that he was the love of your life.....}

"Casey?" Carter sat down on the bed with a sigh, his eyes full of incredible sadness. "Is that it? Have you changed your mind about me?"

She walked over to the bed and sat down next to Carter, although he moved just far enough away from her so that their bodies didn't touch. "Carter," she began tentatively, "you know I've been telling you that I've changed since Jon was born. You know that I've told you that you're the only man I'll ever love – the only man who'll ever make me happy." Carter nodded quickly, but he still pulled away when she reached for him. "Well, some of the things I'm about to tell you may not make you too happy, but I want you to remember that I'm telling you the truth. You wanted to know my *real* reasons, so I'm going to tell you, alright?"