forever ; hyungwonho

12

CHAPTER TWELVE

HAVING a happy ending was all what hoseok wanted.

currently, life was incredibly strange for him, because for a few weeks he was only surrounded by tall trees and clear skies, but now, he was staying in a town with people he didn't even know could be that nice. all hoseok's life, he grew up in a cruel environment, he almost forgot that people could still be friendly and that it wasn't just in the fairy tales.

what made it even more strange, was that there was another person who went through the same thing as hoseok.

it wasn't just losing the person he loved, it was the fact that they were inside his head, talking to him. hyunwoo approached him one day - it was quite a weird encounter, to be honest - saying that he knew. for the life of him, hoseok couldn't figure out what the male meant, until hyungwon started rambling on about how there was another spirit floating around there.

it turned out that hyunwoo lost the love of his life when they were both only fifteen to a sickness. he told hoseok how the boy died right in his arms, and then the next day he woke up with the boy's sweet voice echoing inside his mind. hoseok understood everything he went through.

the only difference was, hyunwoo seemed to be dealing with the absence of his love, way better than hoseok ever could.

now, the boy was sitting on the ground, picking at the strands of grass. sometimes being around people was too much for him; they were always laughing, filled with a happiness, he never seemed to find that within himself.

"what are you thinking about?" the spirit's voice drowned away his thoughts.

he shrugged, "you."

"interesting," hyungwon chuckled. "i was thinking about you, too."

hoseok let his body fall backwards onto the grass. he let out a huff of air, staring up at the clear, blue sky.

"came to any conclusions?" hoseok wanted his words to sound lighthearted, tinted with a bit of sarcasm, just like how they used to. but it didn't sound anything like that. he wanted hyungwon's laugh to resonate through his entire body, bringing it back to life. he wondered when he stopped feeling his heart beat race, or when his lungs constantly felt heavy in his chest.

he wondered if hyungwon could sense he was giving up.

"you're sad."

maybe he did.

hoseok didn't deny it, he just closed his eyelids, feeling the heat of the sun burn into his skin.

hyunwoo soon walked over, taking a spot on the ground next to the boy. he started talking about what he was going to cook for dinner- hoseok had been staying at his home. the dark haired male began giggling as he threaded flowers together, saying how he used to make minhyuk flower crowns when they were both young.

how could someone be so happy, still so full of life, even when their other half wasn't with them? hoseok didn't understand. he couldn't. so, he stood up, muttering a quick goodbye under his breath before hurriedly walking away. he hated the closed-off person he had grown into. he realized he really did lose himself, perhaps, a long time ago. or maybe hoseok was always like that, but didn't notice it because when hyungwon was alive, the boy brought out the kindness in him.

it was quiet, then hoseok mumbled, "is this the happy ending we wanted?" it was mostly to himself, but he knew hyungwon would've heard it.

"i know it's not what we wanted, but at least we're together."

hoseok dragged his fingers through his hair, searching for the right words to say.

he said, "i don't know how long i can keep doing this."

"doing what?"

"living," he threw his arms up in the air, sighing. "it's not the same without you. i can't keep pretending everything is going to get better. it won't and i don't think it ever will."

hoseok let out deep breaths, finally admitting to hyungwon about how he truly felt. he didn't know how the spirit would react, and judging by the deadly silence that followed after his confession, maybe hyungwon would be disappointed in him from not trying harder.

"okay."

the boy furrowed his eyebrows in a questionably manner.

"you don't have to keep going. i'm not forcing you."

"do you think we'd still be together even in the end?" hoseok wondered aloud, not wanting to leave the spirit even after he died.

"i believe we will be."

and that was all it took for hoseok to go ahead with his plan.

later that night, instead of going home to hyunwoo for dinner, hoseok left the town. he ditched another place where only heartache seemed to swarm around him, pulling him further down, away from reality. he was going back to the safe place, just to witness his and hyungwon's favourite spot one last time; also, to know he did keep one promise. the two wanted to see how beautiful the world could be before they went away for good, leaving all their sadness behind.

hoseok still wanted to be with hyungwon forever. he only wanted to be with the other. just, not there. not on earth.

he was going to make their happy ending come true, even if it wasn't how they expected.

even if it meant they were both dead in the end.