Kiss Me. A Lilo Story.

Chapter 19

I'm extremely sorry this took so long to upload! And I know I promised a long chapter but I felt it was the right place to stop.

I just finished writing this so I didn't proof read, sorry! Enjoy!

Soph. xx

I ran into the house with tears gliding down my cheeks uncontrollably. I wiped them away roughly. I was so angry with myself… disgusted actually. Niall never deserved to be treated so badly. I need to fix things with him, he’s one of my best mates. And Liam’s probably mad at me because of all the things I’ve put Niall through. I ran through the living room and up to Liam’s bedroom that we were sharing.

I knew exactly what I had to do… leave Niall alone with his family and the boys for the whole week, he doesn’t need me screwing things up for him. I need to let things cool down and I need to think things through… change my attitude. What if I’ve hurt the other boys with my pranks? I mean… I’ve already driven Liam to cut himself and want to die… I was throwing my clothes back into my bag when I heard a voice behind me.

“What are you doing babe?” Liam asked, sounding normal. What the heck is up with him? First he’s angry and treating me like rubbish, which I am, and now he’s acting like everything’s normal?? I turned to look into his deep brown eyes and my breath hitched when our eyes made contact. He still has that effect on me and I’m never going to get tired of it.

“I-I… wait… you’re not mad at me anymore?” I asked, still confused about the whole situation.

“mad?” he laughed… yes laughed. “Why would I be mad at you?” I looked at him dumbfoundedly.

“Do you feel okay Liam? Because you ignored me and treated me like rubbish this morning and now you’re here… talking to me like everything’s normal!” I exclaimed exasperated. Liam’s mood swings and Niall finally speaking his mind were really giving me a massive headache. I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. Everything I do is completely wrong!

“I feel fine Lou… And I didn’t treat you like rubbish.” He rolled his eyes, “I was just texting Lo—someone…” he explained, suddenly cutting himself off as he realised what he was saying. My eyes narrowed into a glare. He’s keeping things from me again!!

“Who were you texting Liam?! Be honest with me! For once!” I shouted at him, tears already welling up in my eyes again.

“Honest…? You’re going to talk to meabout honesty?! How about you begin by being honest with me?!” he snapped back at me.

“What are you talking about Li?” I asked, completely confused. Maybe I shouldn’t have snapped at him to start with but I can’t help but feel like he going behind my back with something… like… oh I don’t know, possibly texting his ex-girlfriend?!

“When were you planning on telling me you made out with Eleanor?!” he shouted, running a shaky hand through his hair and his eyes shined with tears. My heart completely stopped. I actually forgot to tell him about that! All this time I was afraid that he was cheating on me when in reality I was the one that had been dishonest. My face paled and my eyes widened. How can I be so stupid?! He deserves so much better than me… he deserves someone who can really take care of him, someone honest and sane!

“Lottie told me… At least she cares enough about me to tell me the truth! I’m sick and tired of being in the middle of your web of lies! Did you ever even love me at all?!! Was I just another toy for you to get over your break up with Harry?! What about when we had sex?! Was it just sex for you?!” he questioned, his voice shaking and cracking. The tears were threatening to fall from him gorgoues eyes. He deserves someone so much better… and I know exactly what I have to do. I need him to hate me, to forget completely about me. It’s the only way he’ll stop being heartbroken. My hands balled up into fists and I braced myself for what I was about to say, knowing it wasn’t true at all but he needed to believe it.

“Are you calling me a liar Payne?! Well here’s a truth for you… I had sex with Eleanor when we were at Doncaster… and she was way better than you!!!” I grabbed my suitcase and stormed out of the room, finally letting the tears run free as I ran out of the house and went to the airport. I need him to move on… no matter how much it hurts both of us, we need to be apart or else we’ll end up destroying eachother and the band.

 (WARNING: Liam's P.O.V. might upset some of you so if you get easily upset or this subject is a bit sensible to you, please skip his point of view.)

*Liam’s P.O.V.*

I watched as he stormed out of the room. I couldn’t do anything, I couldn’t breathe… I couldn’t think… The next thing I realised was that my legs has subconsciously led me to my bathroom. I shut the door quietly, feeling numb. I turned to look at myself in the mirror. No wonder Louis doesn’t love me… my hair is ridiculous, my eyebrows are too big. My eyes are a boring brown colour and my lips are too big. My body isn’t good enough for him. I’m screwed up. My mind is fucked up… he deserves better. He was probably just with me out of sympathy… I looked back in the mirror, watching as one tear overflowed my eye lid and rolled down the oh so familiar path down my cheek until it landed on my hands that were clenching onto the counter tightly. Once that tear had fallen, the others came bombarding afterwards. I suddenly felt weak, my legs began quivering as I fell on the floor with my back against the wall. My hand automatically went into my pocket, pulling out the shiny object… the one thing that would make me feel better... My legs instantly craddled into my chest as my vision got blurred with more and more tears. I held the tiny blade against my left wrist, pressing down before beginning to swipe it across. 1, 2, 3, 4 new cuts and I still didn’t feel any better. The pain in my heart was still overpowering the physical pain so I dug the razor in deeper, feeling as the red sticky substance dripped down my arm and onto my pants. Finally the physcial pain was stronger and it felt good. I began feeling relieved… I stared in admiration as the blood slowly dripped down my arm, that ruby red colour was fascinating… captivating actually.

*Niall’s P.O.V.*

After Louis had ran off, leaving me alone in the park, I decided to walk for a little while before going back. I can’t believe I finally snapped at him. It actually felt really good, like I was finally taking control of my life. I wouldn’t ever let him step on me like he used to do. I guess after Liam told me Louis had cheated, I couldn’t help but feel completely angry.

I had to protect my best friend this time. Louis had been hurting Liam for way too long and I wouldn’t allow it to go any further. Hannah had told me to talk to Louis a million times before, I just never had the guts to do it. Hannah… Oh Hannah… I sighed blissfully, a smile pulling at my lips as I thought about her. I was finally going to ask her to move in with me when we get to Ireland tomorrow. I can’t handle being away from her so long and I think her moving in with me would be a great idea.

I hadn’t even realised I was already standing outside of Liam’s childhood home until I was abruptly pulled out of my thoughts as a car pulled up beside me and a sobbing Louis put his suitcase in the trunk of the car. What the hell is going on?! Louis gave me a sad look before letting out a loud and violent sob as he got into the taxi and it drove off. My eyes widened frantically. They must’ve had a massive fight! Was this my fault?! Liam will never forgive me if this--- my eyes widened even more. LIAM!

I ran into the house and up the stairs as quickly as my legs would take me. I ran into his room, searching around from him frantically. He was nowhere in the room. I was about to run out when a light emerging from underneath the bathroom door caught my eye. I sprinted to it, swinging it open, not even bothering to knock first. Tears immediately formed in my eyes as I took in the scene.

There he was, curled up with his knees against his chest, back against the wall. Tears were flowing down his cheeks and there was a bitter smile on his lips as he stared at his wrist that was perched on my knee. The red oozing out of his flesh and staining his pants. His right hand holding his weapon of choice… a little sharp, shiny razor.

I ran to him, ripping the razor out of his hand and shoving it in my backpocket. His eyes snapped to me as his bitter smile turned into a scowl.

“Give it back.” He said sternly, giving me a glare. I just grabbed his unharmed arm and pulled him up to a standing position and over to the sink.

“Liam this has to stop…” I murmered as tears rolled down my cheeks uncontrollably.

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