Under Circumstances || Better Titled: What The Hell Are You Doing, Kaiba?

Oh, shit, um, you shouldn't lie to people, Kaiba.

We weren't prepared for the supply run we had to go on. We hadn't been ready to face what even the small towns had in store for us.

With no weapons on us, we couldn't have been prepared.

The only reason we didn't lose anyone was because of my hesitation.

I had refused to allow them to go. I refused any sort of attempt to gain supplies, no matter how we were low on food, no matter how each would complain.

We needed to be better prepared, and while, I could have gone on with one other, I didn't wish for the others to believe I held any distrust for them.

Trust was important now, more than ever.

I couldn't keep secrets from them, not even one of them.

Luckily, as things were now, those I distrusted were gone.

I surely had nothing to worry about.

It was clear to me, as it should have been to them, that we couldn't go into any towns big or small, unarmed, as that could lead in another loss. We were short one because of Mazaki's downfall, we didn't need to lose another, we didn't need to lose Bakura, or Mutou, or Siegfried, or Jounouchi, or myself. None of us were expendable, I wouldn't have anyone dying on me, not any time soon at least.

I cared too much for the group I kept now.

We had been allowed so much time to develop relationships and boundaries, wouldn't more than one of us be upset if any one else were to leave?

Mazaki's death seemed to effect Mutou, Jounouchi, and Bakura so much still.

From what I had gathered, Mutou had been in love with Mazaki, she had been what made him happiest, and as Jou had supposedly observed, Mutou wasn't alright with her passing.

Jounouchi and Bakura had only been friends with her, yet they had still been friends, her death still tore them up inside.

Siegfried hadn't known her, he wasn't aware of who she was, so he didn't care much at all.

When I thought of her, I only felt some hollow itch within myself, something dragging me down, something to let me know what a horrible person I was. At her death I hadn't cared, I had blamed her for what had happened, I had lashed out at her friend while he mourned, just after he had seen her torn apart.

How had Jounouchi forgiven me for that?

I couldn't get past it.

I was disgusting.

Regardless, now, more than ever, I knew that there was no chance which I would allow us to lose even one more person.

We were down to five.

Only five.

We didn't need to go down room four. Or three. Or two.

Or one.

The more we allowed ourselves to lose, the higher the chance was that none of us would make it.

-

I stood before the group now. We weren't too far from the nearest town.

Our cars were running low on fuel.

Our food supply was near gone.

We no longer had any hygene products.

Yet, for whatever reason, no one seemed to be down.

Everyone was hopeful, bright-eyed and ready to make this run.