Flames

ten

I should be used to getting limited amount of sleep every night, and yet I still feel tired every morning. It’s like my mind likes to ensconce thoughts in my head until I’m getting ready to go to sleep, only to unravel them as I close my eyes and try to get comfortable on the bed. I even tried using sleeping pills, and although they were quite helpful, I stopped consuming them. The mere thought of becoming addicted or causing it to harm my body in any way startled me enough to put an end to it. It’s like every possible remedy I could find online was entitled so it wouldn’t work on me, and only me.

I eventually gave up on trying – putting the effort to keeping my mind occupied instead. I knew I’d need some sleep eventually, so I just waited it out, like a snake squeezing it’s prey until it stops breathing and can swallow it – except nothing like that.

Last night was one of those times, and instead of falling asleep after Zayn dropped me at the house - I changed into my pajamas and watched a marathon of America’s Next Top Model until I completely passed out.

When I woke up the next morning, I was on a sitting position, my leg draped over the armrest and both of my hands stuck in between the cushion beneath me.

Last timed I checked, my phone read 4:35am, and it was now 7:30am.

My father must have had an exciting night considering he was not up yet, and by exciting I actually meant that he drowned his sorrows deeper into the ocean with alcohol – resulting in more needed sleep to wake-up, and go do it all over again.

Rubbing my eyes with the palm of my hands, I stood up from the seat and stretched, only to jerk back a step after realizing one important thing that so easily slipped my mind yesterday.

My car was still parked on the school lot.

Rolling my eyes and letting out an exaggerated grunt, I let my arms fall to my sides and walked back to my room, cursing myself for being forgetful and having to walk to school today.

It took about five minutes to get ready - which was due to getting some sweatpants, a long white sleeved shirt, my shoes and brushing my hair out of my face. To finish the oh-so-amazing look, I brushed my teeth and washed my face in case any saliva or eye rheum was still visible.

There was a school pep assembly in the gym today, and just thinking about it made me nauseas enough to skip breakfast.

Grabbing my backpack, I headed out the door. It was a bit early but since I was walking there, I knew I’d need extra time.

Except the idea was suddenly dropped when I looked to my side and saw my car parked on the driveway - the keys set on top of the hood.

And that’s when the strange feeling in my stomach came back, and Zayn popped into my head, practically staying the there the entire drive to school.

I was early again, as I expected to walk and not drive, so like the day before, I leaned back on the seat and closed my eyes for a bit.

I was hoping Zayn would arrive soon so I could thank him, and after seeing my car, he’d park right next to me - like he had yesterday - but he never did. I purposely opened my eyes once in a while, waiting, yet there was no sign of him, and that made me quite sad.

Once I noticed that there were only a couple minutes for class to start, I started walking inside, looking to my sides once in a while in case Zayn was anywhere near. 

It seemed rather dumb and a bit stupid to be so cautiously waiting for a boy I had just met a day before, but honestly, it felt as if I had known him for months, maybe even years.