||"Just because something is beautiful doesn't mean it's good."||
It was a long day.
Vera was worried, and though Wanda assured her time and time again that she was fine, the young nurse still kept aiding Wanda's every need.
But it was true; Wanda was fine.
But she wasn't in the mood to meet with Elijah, so she canceled their appointment and had Vera tell him that she'd see him the next day when she felt better. So for the rest of the day, Wanda lay around in her room, reading the magazines from her shelf and sleeping. The nosebleed she'd gotten the day before worn her out more than it should have, but it gave her a reason to stay in bed and rest.
When nightfall came, Vera was still by her side.
"You don't have to spend the night with me, Vera. It was just a nosebleed."
"My father had a terrible nosebleed once," she started, positioning the pillows on Wanda's rocking chair to her liking. "Two months later they found a tumor in his brain. A month after that he was dead."
Wanda wrapped her blanket around herself and looked toward the corner where Nik usually stood. Ever since her nosebleed, he hadn't stopped by to see her.
"That's terrible."
Vera finally settled down and relaxed, putting her feet up on the footrest and picking up the bowl of grapes from the small table beside her. "Yeah it was terrible, but that's life."
Out of nowhere, a desolate feeling in Wanda's chest appeared.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
Wanda peered over at her nurse, smiling. "More than okay."
Vera looked down at her bowl of grapes, then stood back up and got into bed with Wanda. "A snack before bed always helps me fall asleep." Wanda grinned, grabbing a handful of grapes from the bowl to stuffing them into her mouth.
After a moment of silence, Wanda asked, "What's it like?"
Vera looked at her and knew exactly what she was asking.
With a soft smile, she answered. "It's the most amazing thing that will have ever happened to you." Vera set the bowl down and crossed her legs. "You've created life and set it free into the world. What's more beautiful than that?"
Wanda placed her hand on her stomach and pictured its growth in her head. In the coming months, she'd grow to have a rather large belly, and the clothes she wore now would be too tight and she'd have no choice but to walk around in sweats and dresses. The thought of this reality was oddly exciting.
"I hope I'm a good mother, much like my own. I just worry that the life I have now will be the life my baby will inherit unknowingly. There is too much tragedy. I don't want that for him."
Vera tilted her head. "Him?"
Wanda had said the pronoun without even realizing it, but she looked down at her belly, her hand sprawled across it, and knew.
"Yeah. Him."
"Though my opinion might not matter as much, I want you to know that despite the lifestyle your son inherits, it'll be you who will mold his happiness. You could have nothing, but a mother's love...that alone is everything."
Unintentional tears formed in Wanda's eyes, and she landed over to give her nurse a tight hug, thankful to have someone there with her, someone who didn't hide in the shadows, someone to hold.
But it was hard to sit there with Vera and not think of Nik. It's who she wanted the most. The only person in the world who didn't judge her. The one person who had trusted her even when she didn't trust herself.
