2. I've missed you.. us
Ashton: stop crying.
I looked up from my phone, sniffling yet again, and probably resembling rudolph the red nosed reindeer quite a bit.
Surveying the quiet classroom, I spotted Ashton from across the room, staring at me. Looking into his sympathetic eyes only caused me to feel even more miserable than I already did. I playfully rolled mine at him before returning my attention to his text.
Me: I'm not, allergies are kicking my ass right now!
I was waiting for a quick response once I immediately saw the three dots pop up until the everyday bell rung, signifying it was time to move to third period.
"Allergies huh?" Ashton basically jumped over a few desks to catch me before I left the classroom and into the beehive hallways where I would've been too lost in the crowd for him to find me, that's no thanks to my astounding, (not), height of 5'2. "I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better." I looked up at him, that same look of pity in his eyes i'd noticed earlier.
Ashton was one of only two people (the other, being my mom) that knew about my big break up. To be fair, i'm sure everyone in the whole school knows. I mean you see one of the very few couples that have been together since freshman year go from being never separated to the two of them never even giving the other a simple glance in their direction. But I trusted him to know the full story because he and I, although never hang out outside of school, are very close and very good friends. We talk everyday about anything and everything, I knew I could go to him in my time of needs.
Two weeks ago. Well, 12 days, to be exact, was when it all went down. And this time, I was counting. It was devastating, the first couple of days without him, I had to start a whole new daily routine, my old one being formed completely around him. We were always sure to see each other between every class, everyday he'd be the first person i'd greet in the morning and the last one i'd say goodnight to, and especially on weekends when we'd typically be spending all hours of the day together.
Actually, I didn't know which I couldn't stand more; the weekends that I now spent cooped in my room, his hoodie warming my body and our pictures clutched in my hand, laying by myself on a bed made for two, tears soaking into my pillow. Or, being stuck in a building for what felt like an infinite amount of time, knowing his every route, watching him talk to his friends and other girls, watching him smiling and having a good time, knowing he's not even thinking twice about me or how i'm doing. It was like a shot to my heart every time I saw him in the halls. He never noticed me though.
I tell Ashton how I appreciate that he cares but stress the fact that I don't need pity.
"I know, I know. You're a tough girl," He rolls his eyes sarcastically before returning back to his serious manner, "but still, i'm here for you, okay?" I flash him a genuine smile and he does the same before forcefully pushing through the large crowds in an attempt to reach his next class.
I felt just a tad bit better after the actual human interaction i'd just been apart of. It wasn't enough to make me completely forget about the fact, though, that I literally had no one to talk to in between classes, sit with during lunch, or hang out with outside of school.
Thanks to Evan's insecurities (and my inability to stand up for myself), I cut off basically all of my friends, (which wasn't much in the first place) but still, boy or girl, it didn't matter. You never wanna be that girl that deserts her friends for some guy because when shit hits the fan, your friends will always be there for you (God willing). Most relationships are temporary and I've learned that with first-hand experience throughout my whole dating life.
