Her ✔

19

he was starting to get frantic
he didn't want to get in trouble
he regretted being caught

he was not human.

he was a brown haired entity that existed.

he- no, it had pale skin
it had black eyes
with a black emptiness inside

where its heart and souls should be

but it was tainted.
and that my friends
is his
no.
it's story.

() Five Years Old ()

people always think it's the father that abuses.

the father that pushes the kid around

the father that shoves the mother.

they never
guess
it's
all
h e r

they think when they see me
my father
an old boxer
did this.

that he causes the bruise under my eyes

that he colors me black and purple in places that aren't seen

that he calls me useless
a failure
trash
waste of space
a horrible son

but that is a l i e
it's all her.
everything
is
my
mother

the mother that's supposed to kiss goodnight

instead gives slaps

the mother that's supposed to wish me goodbye

instead calls me a failure

the mother that's supposed to love me

looks at me with hate.

and I can't
do anything
about
it.

someone
please
stop
this

() Ten Years Old ()

bye bye dad.
looks like they thought you did this.

haha
your crying

hah.
men shouldn't cry
right mom?

s l a p

okay
ill shut up
I'm sorry.
it's my fault
it's my fault
it's my fault

oh
I'm crying?
I'm sorry.
men shouldn't cry
I shouldn't be like Dad.
Dad was weak.
And now he's gone

I should be like you
right mom-

S L A P

oh
I'm on the floor
that hurt
I won't cry.

ill be strong.
I won't be weak.
I won't be kind.
ill be just like you.

just like you M O M

() Fifteen Years Old ()

...
it's cold.
I'm in the shed again
FUCK her.

she can die.
overdose for all I care.

Stop lying to yourself, Mason

right
I could never hate her.
right.

hah
I can hate myself though
right?

...
...
...

r i g h t

() Present Time ()

she overdosed
dads gone.
I'm alone.

good
that's good
right?

then
what do I do?
who do I lean on?
was mom weak
or was dad weak

Am I weak?

No.
No.
I was raised how mom taught me.
Then why'd she die?

Gasps,
Short breaths,
Feet slapping against pavement
Screams
Tears falling

HELP ME
NO
COME BACK
PLEASE
I DONT CARE IF YOU HURT ME ANYMORE
HIT ME
SLAP ME
DO WHATEVER

just please
don't leave me alone
please
mommy
daddy?

im scared

he's sobbing now
crying
in the middle of his empty house
screaming out their names

at this moment
his heart was tainted
and he was far gone
too far for anyone to save

but maybe not to far for her.