My Life Story

Chapter 6: What I Now Feel Towards Jake

                          {based on a true story *different names used}

If I remember everything that I felt when I started liking Jake I would tell you I felt like every time Jake said my name I would like I were in heaven and I felt like I was dreaming. But I have changed since he rejected me I will never be the same I changed in a good way. During the summer in 2016 I reflected and thought the best way to stop thinking about Jake was to stay away. He tries to get close to me but I instantly move and no second thoughts I move. I will never fall for him again I will never make the same mistake falling for Jake.

If it weren't for Jake I would have never changed and become stronger. I was there for him when he needed to talk to someone he made me feel special but no all I ever was was his toy he hurt me. I was too young to understand what true love was. I was depressed for 3 years and a half until I put a stop to it in the summer of 2016 I said"I am going to move on next time I begin the school year, I will forget what Jake ever mean't to me I will act as if I don't know him this way I will be able to move on." This way I moved on.

Then one day, Jake was transferred to my P.E class he stared at me thinking I was going to start a conversation like I always used to but I stayed strong and continued with on with my life. He eventually got the message that I was moving on. I think it was best to not mope around for Jake who was not worth crying for he was a player he would flirt with two girls at the same time. He once flirted with Sophia and me but then I knew what he was doing and I left. He always thought he could play with my feelings he did it for 3 years and I finally put an end to it this year.

I got hurt and I put an end to suffering. I don't care what he does or doesn't do I stopped caring a long time ago. Everything I felt before faded away the day he found out I liked him and he rejected me. He told everyone that I had a crush on him and everyone's insults stayed with me until I decided to move on. Whenever he gets close to me I walk away or move then he stops trying to get close to me.

Riverdale helped me take my mind off the boys( Jesse, Steven, and Jake) now I'm waiting for the second season. It would clear my mind off I would then realize " wait how long has it been since I thought about them." I would keep the drama out of my mind. Before I was watching Riverdale my life was stressful I thought about the boys, And school which I almost had testing days. Every single day I have to walk past Jake in the halls he looks at me I just walk past him not looking at him.

I cannot stand Jake he thinks I forgot what happened no I haven't forgotten. Once when his crush moved in 2nd grade how stupid was I when I thought I may have a chance with him. He started crushing on someone else he ignored me for sometime he forgot he had a friend who he could talk to. Then he met some other kid who was crushing on me but I didn't like that kid I liked Jake. I was the girl he never noticed I stood there looking at him playing with girls.

He thought I was the same innocent girl he met a few years ago who let people bug her. When he saw me he couldn't recognize me he then noticed I wasn't the same. He changed me I thank him for that if he never would have hurt me I wouldn't have became stronger. I now stand up for myself and won't let others humiliate me the old me let them humiliate me and never said a word. He would see people bugging me and never said a word he didn't want others to see he was the hero because then they would make fun of him and his reputation was all he cared about.

About the boys( Steven and Jesse), there is one thing I am afraid of. I'm afraid to get hurt and fall for the wrong guy. I think everyday "even though you don't want to see them you will see them eventually they are both in one of your classes." I always have to pass by them and try to not blush. Sometimes I find Jake hanging out with Steven which maybe a reason I shouldn't talk to Steven.

I have been hurt and I make sure my friends don't make the same mistakes as I did with Jake. Jake was never the one for me and I have learned that a long time ago and he could do what ever he does with girls I am not one of his victims anymore. No matter how many smiles or winks he does there will be no possibility of us anymore. Jake has done many things to try to get me to talk to him all I have ever said is Hi. He wants to humiliate me like others have done. I once had a diary and he hid it somewhere I knew it was him.

I got mad at him and he ended up admitting it was him and apologized. I was lucky I never mentioned Jake in my diary. I was once passing notes with Juliette big mistake never pass notes. In that note I was mentioning Jake and the teacher took it she didn't read it out loud but she read it to herself and laughed. I was embarrassed and Jake asked what we wrote and we never told him to this day he doesn't know the truth.