Over Again ( A Kian Lawley / O2L )

Chapter 25 - Stop Caring

After Emily left, I didn't really know what to think.

Would Emily and Kian actually be together? I never thought about it really because I didn't think Kian would want that. But it would make sense.

It also wouldn't make sense because I know that Kian doesn't care much for her. Would he look past that for his child? Or does he like her now?

Are they talking now? Are they a thing yet? I didn't get the impression from Emily that they are together now because she said that they would be.

I've been trying to deny the fact that I want to be with Kian, and eventually I came to the conclusion that I really do love him and want to be with him. But, how am I supposed to be with him when he has a child on the way with a girl I absolutely despise? And how am I supposed to be with him after I just got accused of cheating on my ex-boyfriend with Kian? Me dating him would make that lie look like a truth.

Maybe I should just give up on dating for a while. I mean, I could use a year male-free. It would save me a lot of stress. Plus, it's not like I'm going to find the love of my life as a teenager. Maybe I should just let things happen how they happen and go with the flow.

The thought crosses my mind that just casually having guy friends would be nice. The kind of guy friend that I would have no romantic attachment with yet we could still have fun every now and then and do couple-type things. I mean, as a teenager, I love making out with guys. But I don't want to have a boyfriend in order to do that. Can I just have a friend that will makeout with me?

I shake my head, laughing at my own thoughts. It would be fun, but it wouldn't give people the best impression of me.

Wait, why the hell should I give a shit about what other people say about me? I shouldn't. So I should do what makes me happy and not have to worry about judgement. After all, if people are going to judge me, they're going to judge me no matter what I do. Whether I act like a whore or act like a goody-two-shoes, as long as I'm happy why should I care about what people think about me?

I smile, thinking about how simple I could make my life if I just stopped worrying so damn much about everything.

I look back out at the ocean, realizing that it's nearly five o'clock.

I turn and walk around the beach, looking for someone to talk to. I'm glad that I'm not extremely shy because if I was I wouldn't make any friends. Since I don't want to leave the beach, I walk around, trying to find someone who seems nice.

"Hey," a voice says from behind me before someone grabs onto my arm. I turn around, seeing a handsome guy behind me. He's the same height as me and has pretty green eyes and brown hair. Bingo.

"Hi," I say with a smile, hoping he doesn't take my politeness as flirting, although flirting would be okay as long as it just stayed friendly.

"You look lost. Ya new here?" He asks, smiling back at me. His teeth are perfectly straight and their whiteness contrasts wonderfully with his tanned skin.

"No, actually," I say, laughing a little. "I just haven't hung here in a while."

He nods. "I'm Brock," he tells me, extending his hand to me. This causes me to giggle, grabbing his hand and shaking it.

"I'm Maddie," I say, telling him my nickname rather than my actual name.

He nods, grinning at me.

"You wanna hang out with me and my friends?" He asks, pointing over somewhere behind him. I nod without even looking at who his friends are.

He grabs my hand but doesn't try to lace his fingers with mine, which I appreciate. Once we get to his group, I scan the faces, noticing that they're all guys.