Dakota POV
I was walking Zepp at the park and decide its a good idea to head back to my place for lunch and a quick shower. I have dinner plans tonight with my mom and sister and I do not want to smell like a sweaty gym sock. I got a great work out chasing Zepp around the park. I start walking back to my apartment and thinking about everything that has happened since fifty shades and since Jamie Dornan stepped into my life with his charm and wit and humor and sexiness.. why must he be so damn tempting. I remember asking my mom if she ever fell in love with a costar when I was younger but I just thought I would be completely immune to any person on screen with me. I thought this was just another job. An accelerating force on my career. That is all this was supposed to be and after Charlie backed out and we found Jamie, I thought it was perfect because I trust him and he is married. That was the last thing that happened. Our relationship blossomed quickly into more than just friends. I even lost a child of his of ours. Now, I am walking back with the only guy to never let me down, my Zeppelin. I tell him in a low voice he is the only man for me and concede in my mind to keep our relationship (Jamie) strictly professional and as friends. Too much has passed between us but that has also made me stronger. I do not need a man to see my worth. With Jordan, it was different I felt wrong following my heart and fulfilling my purpose in the Fifty franchise but with Jamie I always felt completely on my own two feet and supported. I feel like something bad is going to happen suddenly and then I reach my home. Jamie is standing outside my door, apparently, he had knocked and was turning around. He looked up at me and his face smiled but his heart faded. Oh, I don't know what he is doing here but I do know it is not good for either of us.
Jamie POV
I turn to see her and she is as breathtaking as always. I smile hopefully hiding the sadness I feel. Having to tell her this after everything I already have put her through. It wont be easy. I feel like the biggest jerk in the world. I know I didn't do this on purpose or to hurt her but I feel like this is the cruelest thing I could possibly tell her. Dakota, I wanted to talk to you in person. I know we haven't really spoken in a while and with shooting, promos, and interviews coming soon I figure you should know something. Can I come in and talk to you?. She nods yes and opens her door. Zepp licks my hands as he enters before us and then she does and I follow.
"So, what's up Jamie?" she stares at me eating away at my soul. "Dakota, I found out a few days ago that Amelia is pregnant with my child from that night I got drunk. Please just let me finish before you say a word. I told her its over and she cannot keep me tied to her and what she did was disgusting and vile. She responded very differently than I expected. She told me that what she did that night was a moment of weakness and that she knows I love you. She has known since she first saw us on set. She says she wont get rid of the baby and I would never ask her to, but she said that she will do whatever I want and she also admitted to never loving me like she loved Colin. She told me to tell you first before this whole mess goes to the press. I flew out here as soon as I could and wanted to tell you first. Her family does not even know. She even told Dulcie I was gonna call you. I decided on flying here instead. Amelia is here in LA as well she wants to come talk to us. She wants this to work out for all of us. Please baby just let her talk to us for a few minutes" I stop talking finally long enough to see the look of horror on her face. She is speechless and I know this is the reaction I feared and it is really happening in front of me.
"How do you expect me to feel? I come home after not really speaking to you for months and you tell me you knocked up your wife. Congratulations I guess? I mean you and I could never be at least not right now, right? I guess this is what I feared all along that you would do something like this. I can understand you getting drunk and sleeping with your WIFE! Why couldn't I see that before. This is just fine Jamie. We will still be friends nothing more. Not until this whole situation is clear cut for the both of us. I need time away from you I am filming another project and then we start talking to Universal about the next movies. I heard Sam may be out and they are looking for a new director", She sighs and her eyes fill with tears and I by instinct come towards her and she puts up her hands as if to say, stay away.
"I am the biggest asshole that ever lived. I am so sorry Dakota. I want us. I love...." "ENOUGH! I cant hear this anymore!", she walks away and goes straight to her bathroom and shuts the door. I stand by it and say my last few words before I go, "Dakota Mayi Johnson, I do love you, even if you don't want to hear it. I have to say it because without you I am empty. I know you are hurt now and I can give you all the time you need but I wont give up. I will never stop loving you". I hear her breathing on the other side and I walk to her apartment door. I yell Goodbye I am leaving now, and walk out and close the door behind me.
As I walk out to my car I cannot help but start to ball like if my puppy just died and I was 5. I get in and let it all out. Snot coming out my nose and all. I find a tissue box and then the tears really start to come down. I cant drive like this. I sit there for like an hour composing myself and finally put my sunglasses on and begin the drive to the airport. I had texted Amelia in the car and I told her I had to go. I didn't tell her anything else but she understood and said she would see me soon. I booked a flight out to Ireland leaving in 1 hour and I drove like a bat out of hell but just under the speeding point. I was angry, hurt, I felt abandoned. I felt alone for the first time since mom died. I wasn't letting this stop me it just slowed me down a whole lot. Dakota has a right to be hurt but why does it sting so bad. I head in a fog towards the airport.
I board the plane to South Africa for my next film. Next thing I remember everything is in a haze. The stewardess says something I am not listening too and I put my earphones on and drown everything out to some Elvis Presley the saddest of the Kings songs I can find. My eyes are swollen and my heart is shriveled up and as I drift off to sleep I feel the plane take off. I will talk to my dad and Samina. They will know what to say to soothe my soul. Hopefully I can find it in me to work and not think too much of what I am leaving behind.
Dakota POV
I cried for hours and then I hear Zepp at the bathroom door. He is whining at me and I know he has to go out. I get up look in the mirror and I am not who I was this morning, I am scarred so deep and so brutally. Love sucks. Loving a married man sucks worse. I am lost and without direction, for the first time I want my daddy in a long time. I put a pair of sunglasses on to cover up my swollen red eyes. I head out to walk Zepp and I am completely numb. A fan spots me and I quickly walk the opposite way. I hastily finish walking Zepp and get back to my place. I call my dad, he answers after the first ring, "Hey baby, are you okay? It is pretty late". I open my mouth to speak and I hear myself just sobbing and I cannot even understand what I am saying. "Dad, can I come see you I miss you and I am not feeling great right now. I think my heart is broken and I don't know who else can fix it but you". He sighs and replies "Baby, you can come anytime in fact I will drive over right now and come get you! I will be on the way and be there by morning is that okay?", I say yes and he says we will talk when I get there but if you want to call your mother too, that way she can help you.
Hours Later
My dad gets there with his extra key and I am still crying on the couch and he doesn't say a word. He walks to my room gets my suitcase takes like half my closet shoves it in the luggage and throws that in the car. He comes in picks me up and takes me to the car. He gets Zepp and we are on the way. I look at him and he touches my forehead, "Rest baby we will be there soon". With that I close my eyes and fall into a sound sleep.
