The Spark {Book 5 in the Star of Gryffindor Series}

Chapter 15 - The Holidays

The Daily Prophet
Issue No. 102,030
10 December, 2021

Sarcasm Missed by Majority of Wizards, New Poll Says

After twelve hundred owls came with letters for the editor about how there in fact is rampant terrorism around the country, the Daily Prophet took a poll to discover how much sarcasm goes over the average wizard's head. We had very high expectations of the intelligence of wizardkind, and it was terribly shocking to see that most wizards do not understand sarcasm.

Our findings showed that the ages 11-17 picked up the most, while older age groups tended to be grossly outraged by the sarcastic comments in the study instead of realizing that they were sarcastic. Like terrorism, a lack of basic knowledge of the English language is rampant throughout the country, it seems. Perhaps Hogwarts should focus on that instead of divination or ancient runes.

~~

The Daily Prophet
Issue No. 102,031
11 December, 2021

The Prophet Apologizes

The Prophet would like to apologize for insulting the intelligence of any of its readers. An assistant who has since been dealt with snuck an editorial onto the front page yesterday. The Prophet is very sorry that this was not caught and does not hold any of the views given in the article.

~~~~

On the train ride at the beginning of the holidays, I was consumed by two very opposite emotions.

One was excitement. Toire and Teddy had both written me multiple times about how amazing little Charis was, and their excitement had of course leaked to me. They'd asked me to be her godmother, which was a bit scary. I was honored, though, and determined to be the best godmother/cousin ever to that baby.

The other was nervousness. Mr. Potter had already asked Aunt Andromeda about me visiting my father once, and received a flat no with a refusal to even hear him out. I was determined to explain why I really needed to speak to him, and maybe even pull out the Voldemort card on her if I had to. The prospect of visiting Azkaban was terrifying, though. I didn't know what she would say, but a small part of me almost hoped she'd say no.

I hadn't told any of my friends about that. I didn't want to worry them unnecessarily, for one thing, and at the moment, they were all happy, laughing, looking forward to the holidays. I didn't want to wreck their mood. So I smiled and laughed and tried to focus on the happy end of my current emotional spectrum.

Teddy had sent me several pictures of Charis, and in each one she looked different. Apparently, she tended to change hair color based on which family member she was looking at, which gave Toire quite a shock one morning when she walked in to find Aunt Andromeda holding a silver-haired baby (apparently, Veelas don't get gray hair, and that trait had lasted in Toire's mum's part-Veela side of the family). Most of the pictures featured a blue or blonde-headed kid, unsurprisingly. Even Colette had to admit it was adorable.

"Mum and Dad are hosting a New Year's Party," Albus was saying. "You're all in invited, of course, though I don't know if they'll invite your dad, Colette."

"He probably wouldn't come, even if they did," Colette said, shrugging. "I'll try to make it, though."

"Mum and Dad used to have a huge New Year's party every year when I was younger," James said. "But then one year I accidentally spilled all the champagne and broke everything in the living room, including the ball. As they were dropping it."